I am a 43 year old heterosexual woman. My husband and I have been married for 14 years and have a 13 year old ********! I am 5ft10 tall heterosexual curvy hourglass shaped attractive brunette. I have very large breasts and i do have a big butt. I don't intend to dress in any particular 'way' for anyone. I just wear what I like. I don't 'ask' for anything. I don't ask to be groped. I wear clothes that fit me properly. Most of my outfit are satin pant and skirt suits satin coats and satin and silk blouses. I am always on high heels and full make up on. If you are curvy, tall and busty, many clothes tend to look sexier on you than on a thin person. So things that fit properly that are relatively conservative can be suddenly too revealing and sexy when you put it on. This happens to me a lot. I wear almost always my satin and silk blouses fully buttoned to the top combined with a satin skirt or satin pants. I don't wear anything vulgar but because of my body type anything i wear looks tight on me. Being tall and curvy draws attention on its own. This can be both positive and negative. I tower over plenty of men and women. I was sexualised from a very early age, and shamed for the way my body looks - something I have no control over. I can't help how wide my hips grow or how big my breasts get.
My mother used to shame me for the way my body looked. If I wanted to wear a skirt or dress, she always discouraged it, she always thought my skirt was 'too short' or 'too tight', or there was something wrong with my dress-sense. There's always guys flirting or asking me for my number. When I go out in public guys start talking to me and subtly try to ask me out. I mention I have a husband but some of them wont go away. I have trouble being mean so i cant get them to leave me alone. I end up getting stressed by it. The irony is that all this time I've been afraid of men, perceiving any touch as a sexual advance that I should fear - when really, it was a short, skinny old woman I should have feared. My story just seems so implausible that I feel I won't be believed.
About four months ago i attended this all-female group meeting with a specific focus on developing self-awareness, self-confidence and self-efficacy for women to improve their professional and personal lives. I was wearing a purple long sleeve satin blouse buttoned up to the top,black satin pencil skirt, sheer black pantyhose and 5 inch heels purple shoes. I had full make up on.
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I was just standing outside waiting for it to start, and this skinny really short like 5ft3 tall wrinkled face thin lips green eyes gray haired masculine ugly woman in her mid 50s behind me started stroking my back and saying "You have a beautiful blouse. Wow. You are such a big woman. Standing next to you i look like a midget. By the way i am the Facilitator. Why are you here? ".
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I introduced myself to her and said " A lot of people think that I'm stuck up upper middle class arrogant overdressed snob because I tend to ignore them. When i am in an environment where I do not know everyone I can come as arrogant and stuck up depending on the setting. Is truly a defensive mechanism though.I got the feeling that a lot of people think i am just arrogant snob. I barely have any friends. I just want someone to understand, hear me. When I do speak with people, I tend to be overly nice to compensate and I guess that comes off as fake which definitely doesn't help the situation. People around me (except for the ones who truly know me) have always said that I come across as snobby, stuck on myself, and unfriendly. The truth is, I'm just really shy and insecure when it comes to socializing with people. I do have several close friends, but it bugs me that A LOT of people think I'm a snob when that couldn't be further from the truth. I have been told that I seem snobby and it is because I don't speak up in groups where I am not comfortable. I have had people ask me if I thought I was better than others."
This woman the Facilitator said to me wit a creepy smile on her face " I will help you with that, but you have to trust me. My methods are unconventional. Common big woman" Then she grabbed my left hand with her left hand and she placed her right hand very low down in the small of my back (actually quite a bit lower than that).
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We entered. There were 14 women in their 40s and 50s. This woman the Facilitator introduced me to them. The whole time while we were walking and while she was introducing me to the group, she kept holding my left hand with her left hand and her right hand patting my lower back and top of my butt. One chubby short red haired woman asked me" Why are you so overdressed? You look so glammed up ".
" I like dressing well, and looking presentable. I ’d rather be wearing something i feel good in than look like i just rolled out of bed.I wear high heels every day too.All the time." I answered to her.
Then this woman the Facilitator sat me in a chair in the middle of the room, pretty much front and center of everyone else. A few minutes later I got up to go an get bottled water she kept pushing me down to sit like if I was a naughty child trying to run away. After she saw that I just wanted to get the bottled water, she calmed down a bit. Then as she was standing behind me this woman the Facilitator started massaging my shoulders. "You are so tense. You just need to relax. Just trust me" She said to me. .
This massage bothered me but I didn't know how to say to her don't touch me with out sounding rude. So she kept rubbing my shoulders for like 10 minutes, then she just placed her hands on my collar bones. She rested her hands on my collar bones for like 5 minutes. Then she said loudly" Our new member will join this conversation. Common big woman, get up."
So i got up and started talking about my issues, but i had the feeling that everything coming out of my mouth was stupid. I was talking for like 5 minutes, and this woman the Facilitator was standing beside me, rubbing my lower back with her right hand. Then we had a coffee break. I was standing by the coffee machine and this woman the Facilitator walked past and slapped my butt hard. It was actually audible and in front of everyone but no one even reacted. I just turned around and saw her smiling at me as she walked off. 5 minutes later again she gave me a big, hearty slap on the ass when she was walking past.
It was odd, but I let it go. I walked to the restroom. This woman the Facilitator followed me in. I was in front of the mirror, she hugged me from behind cupped my breasts with her both hands and started feeling up and jiggling them. I was speecless. "Your breasts are soo large. My methods are unconventional. Do you trust me? I am very touchy feely person. But my touch is not sexual at all. Also i am not tough and strong. I am tiny short skinny 54year old woman. I am physically completely harmless. You are so tall and and being well endowed well built and curvy on high heels makes you HUGE! Standing next to you i look like a midget. You are physically stronger than me. Why are you so arrogant? Why? Just talk to me." .She kept jiggling and feeling up my breasts while she was talking.
"Please remove your hands from my breasts. Also i am straight and i never had any desire to do anything sexual with a female". I said to her. She moved her hands from my breasts and placed them on my waist. I kept talking " I'm often thought of as stuck up because I don't usually talk unless I have to. I get nervous just walking into a room and saying hello to everyone. I think that maybe I have a certain look on my face when people see me; I mean, to me it's my "I'm seriously nervous and uncomfortable" face, but to others I think it makes them feel like I think that I'm better than everyone. So everyone just thinks I'm stand-offish and an overall rude person who thinks way too highly of themselves."
" That is why i am touching you. You must trust me." she said. Then we walked from the restroom. She walked beside me with her right hand resting on my butt. I sat on my chair, and she sat on a chair behind me. behind me and began rubbing my back. I felt awkward. She then began furthering her reach and casually brushed across my rib cage/side boob. I thought it was an accident, then she did it again and left her hand there and leaned in to whisper something about her unconventional methods. She kept rubbing my back then leaned in and stopped at the same spot and said something else. And that happened a few times. She began fully brushing the sides of my breasts. While she was standing talking her hands were resting on my shoulders. Her hands were practically constantly on me during the rest of the meeting. The meeting ended I started to rise from the chair while she was still sitting, and she then reached over with her both hands and squeezed my butt about five times .
I didn't know what to do, and I actually laughed, even though that was the last thing I felt like doing. As we were leaving on the parking lot this woman the Facilitator pulled me aside, and said to me " Big woman, do you trust me? I will help you with your issues. Wow, big woman, your breasts are exactly the level of my face". She placed her hands on my breasts and moved them in circular motions. I just snapped and I slapped her. Hard. I pushed her away from me and turned away again and she started crying saying that i am an arrogant, stuck up snob and that. She just walked away defeated, and apparently was crying in her car..
But this chubby red haired short woman, group member saw the whole situation. She walked up to me and she yelled at me " You are so tall with your huge boobs your big ass your flashy clothes. You are glamorous, elegant and fashionable. Your breasts are so massive. What do you expect? Some women for whatever reason feel it is appropriate to grab them and touch them because they're so big. The facilitator was just showing appreciation for your curves, height and clothes. She is not physically threatening to you at all, and the chances that she wants to actually **** you are virtually nil. I wonder why is it such an offense to you some woman to grab your boobs or buttcheeks. You stupid overdressed insensitive cow.''
Afterwards when i got home I started breathing hard, my legs got weak, and my heart started to race really fast. It’s not something I’ll ever get over, but it does get easier over time.
My mother used to shame me for the way my body looked. If I wanted to wear a skirt or dress, she always discouraged it, she always thought my skirt was 'too short' or 'too tight', or there was something wrong with my dress-sense. There's always guys flirting or asking me for my number. When I go out in public guys start talking to me and subtly try to ask me out. I mention I have a husband but some of them wont go away. I have trouble being mean so i cant get them to leave me alone. I end up getting stressed by it. The irony is that all this time I've been afraid of men, perceiving any touch as a sexual advance that I should fear - when really, it was a short, skinny old woman I should have feared. My story just seems so implausible that I feel I won't be believed.
About four months ago i attended this all-female group meeting with a specific focus on developing self-awareness, self-confidence and self-efficacy for women to improve their professional and personal lives. I was wearing a purple long sleeve satin blouse buttoned up to the top,black satin pencil skirt, sheer black pantyhose and 5 inch heels purple shoes. I had full make up on.
.
I was just standing outside waiting for it to start, and this skinny really short like 5ft3 tall wrinkled face thin lips green eyes gray haired masculine ugly woman in her mid 50s behind me started stroking my back and saying "You have a beautiful blouse. Wow. You are such a big woman. Standing next to you i look like a midget. By the way i am the Facilitator. Why are you here? ".
.
I introduced myself to her and said " A lot of people think that I'm stuck up upper middle class arrogant overdressed snob because I tend to ignore them. When i am in an environment where I do not know everyone I can come as arrogant and stuck up depending on the setting. Is truly a defensive mechanism though.I got the feeling that a lot of people think i am just arrogant snob. I barely have any friends. I just want someone to understand, hear me. When I do speak with people, I tend to be overly nice to compensate and I guess that comes off as fake which definitely doesn't help the situation. People around me (except for the ones who truly know me) have always said that I come across as snobby, stuck on myself, and unfriendly. The truth is, I'm just really shy and insecure when it comes to socializing with people. I do have several close friends, but it bugs me that A LOT of people think I'm a snob when that couldn't be further from the truth. I have been told that I seem snobby and it is because I don't speak up in groups where I am not comfortable. I have had people ask me if I thought I was better than others."
This woman the Facilitator said to me wit a creepy smile on her face " I will help you with that, but you have to trust me. My methods are unconventional. Common big woman" Then she grabbed my left hand with her left hand and she placed her right hand very low down in the small of my back (actually quite a bit lower than that).
.
We entered. There were 14 women in their 40s and 50s. This woman the Facilitator introduced me to them. The whole time while we were walking and while she was introducing me to the group, she kept holding my left hand with her left hand and her right hand patting my lower back and top of my butt. One chubby short red haired woman asked me" Why are you so overdressed? You look so glammed up ".
" I like dressing well, and looking presentable. I ’d rather be wearing something i feel good in than look like i just rolled out of bed.I wear high heels every day too.All the time." I answered to her.
Then this woman the Facilitator sat me in a chair in the middle of the room, pretty much front and center of everyone else. A few minutes later I got up to go an get bottled water she kept pushing me down to sit like if I was a naughty child trying to run away. After she saw that I just wanted to get the bottled water, she calmed down a bit. Then as she was standing behind me this woman the Facilitator started massaging my shoulders. "You are so tense. You just need to relax. Just trust me" She said to me. .
This massage bothered me but I didn't know how to say to her don't touch me with out sounding rude. So she kept rubbing my shoulders for like 10 minutes, then she just placed her hands on my collar bones. She rested her hands on my collar bones for like 5 minutes. Then she said loudly" Our new member will join this conversation. Common big woman, get up."
So i got up and started talking about my issues, but i had the feeling that everything coming out of my mouth was stupid. I was talking for like 5 minutes, and this woman the Facilitator was standing beside me, rubbing my lower back with her right hand. Then we had a coffee break. I was standing by the coffee machine and this woman the Facilitator walked past and slapped my butt hard. It was actually audible and in front of everyone but no one even reacted. I just turned around and saw her smiling at me as she walked off. 5 minutes later again she gave me a big, hearty slap on the ass when she was walking past.
It was odd, but I let it go. I walked to the restroom. This woman the Facilitator followed me in. I was in front of the mirror, she hugged me from behind cupped my breasts with her both hands and started feeling up and jiggling them. I was speecless. "Your breasts are soo large. My methods are unconventional. Do you trust me? I am very touchy feely person. But my touch is not sexual at all. Also i am not tough and strong. I am tiny short skinny 54year old woman. I am physically completely harmless. You are so tall and and being well endowed well built and curvy on high heels makes you HUGE! Standing next to you i look like a midget. You are physically stronger than me. Why are you so arrogant? Why? Just talk to me." .She kept jiggling and feeling up my breasts while she was talking.
"Please remove your hands from my breasts. Also i am straight and i never had any desire to do anything sexual with a female". I said to her. She moved her hands from my breasts and placed them on my waist. I kept talking " I'm often thought of as stuck up because I don't usually talk unless I have to. I get nervous just walking into a room and saying hello to everyone. I think that maybe I have a certain look on my face when people see me; I mean, to me it's my "I'm seriously nervous and uncomfortable" face, but to others I think it makes them feel like I think that I'm better than everyone. So everyone just thinks I'm stand-offish and an overall rude person who thinks way too highly of themselves."
" That is why i am touching you. You must trust me." she said. Then we walked from the restroom. She walked beside me with her right hand resting on my butt. I sat on my chair, and she sat on a chair behind me. behind me and began rubbing my back. I felt awkward. She then began furthering her reach and casually brushed across my rib cage/side boob. I thought it was an accident, then she did it again and left her hand there and leaned in to whisper something about her unconventional methods. She kept rubbing my back then leaned in and stopped at the same spot and said something else. And that happened a few times. She began fully brushing the sides of my breasts. While she was standing talking her hands were resting on my shoulders. Her hands were practically constantly on me during the rest of the meeting. The meeting ended I started to rise from the chair while she was still sitting, and she then reached over with her both hands and squeezed my butt about five times .
I didn't know what to do, and I actually laughed, even though that was the last thing I felt like doing. As we were leaving on the parking lot this woman the Facilitator pulled me aside, and said to me " Big woman, do you trust me? I will help you with your issues. Wow, big woman, your breasts are exactly the level of my face". She placed her hands on my breasts and moved them in circular motions. I just snapped and I slapped her. Hard. I pushed her away from me and turned away again and she started crying saying that i am an arrogant, stuck up snob and that. She just walked away defeated, and apparently was crying in her car..
But this chubby red haired short woman, group member saw the whole situation. She walked up to me and she yelled at me " You are so tall with your huge boobs your big ass your flashy clothes. You are glamorous, elegant and fashionable. Your breasts are so massive. What do you expect? Some women for whatever reason feel it is appropriate to grab them and touch them because they're so big. The facilitator was just showing appreciation for your curves, height and clothes. She is not physically threatening to you at all, and the chances that she wants to actually **** you are virtually nil. I wonder why is it such an offense to you some woman to grab your boobs or buttcheeks. You stupid overdressed insensitive cow.''
Afterwards when i got home I started breathing hard, my legs got weak, and my heart started to race really fast. It’s not something I’ll ever get over, but it does get easier over time.