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Regret

A

AmyAtrophy

I hate myself for having this fetish. I hate what a weird pervert porn addiction has made me. I hate how I fetishize my own isolation/loneliness. Every time I finish to this material I have the most intense shame and regret. I'd give anything to be free from this horrible fetish it is psychologically damaging and traumatic. This material is highly addictive and I'd give just about anything to be free from this shit once and for all
 
WhiteSubmissionM said:
Too much porn and fantasizing (especially the kind with dark themes) isn't healthy, that's for sure. Sometimes it's just best to force yourself to take a break from it and find better things to do and think about -- it's not easy though. It's hard to give it up completely , but have to find some balance somewhere.
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I need a long break from porn. I'm trying to stop fantasizing too, it always comes up in my dreams. Both porn and sex.

oldnblack said:
Have you checked out yourbrainonporn.com or The Andreia Philosophy. There's a nofap subreddit as well.
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I have an account on NoFap website on the forums. Was doing pretty good for awhile but that's all went to hell. Just gonna try and start a new streak and just not think about sex.

I need to get this off my chest, my first girlfriend cuckolded me the entire time we were dating in a 3 year relationship. The other guy was White but still, the day I found out about this left permanent deep scars in my psyche. I want to quit the internet too not just porn and try to heal myself of this fetish because it's really messed with my head bad and once I finish, this whole fetish disgusts me
 
Fill up that idle times in your life with some activity. My fascination with porn waxes and wanes by the amount of idle unsupervised time I have. I use the term "fascination" instead of addiction because I have addictions before. Does your porn use stop you from doing other things? Do you ever cancel something so you can use porn?

Make sure before you criticise yourself that your just not just spending idle time. Some people watch sports, some people watch hallmark channel, some people read romance novels, you enjoy porn.
 
WhiteSubmissionM said:
I had this same exact experience, and I think it's the main cause of my interest in this "fetish" or whatever you might call it. Dating an upper-middle class white bitch who was better than me, and let me know it, but she still pretended to want me, while secretly (and sometimes not so secretly) chasing after better men at work and online -- making a mess of my life in the process

(ultimately my fault for letting that happen -- advice to young men, ALWAYS be ready to walk, without looking back, few of them are worth a damn, and if you can find a unicorn, well, you are damned lucky and should move heaven and earth if you have to to keep her, even the "good" ones will bounce for something better).

Yeah, it's impossible to "get over" it -- but, you can get better. You just have to be strong and set some firm limits , easier said than done though, I know. Like GerW says, we all have our distractions - for some it's sports, for some of us it's porn and weird fantasies. Just have to set some boundaries and stick to them -- and don't kick yourself for "relapsing" (you will).

Also keep in mind, some of the men on these sorts of sites are true sociopaths and real-life assholes (not just fantasizers) -- so it can be good to not get too involved with them, and to ignore them/shun them if you have to. You won't meet any true "friends" on a site like this, that's for sure -- if you do, you've done the equivalent of winning the lottery).
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Reading your post makes me feel better. I should've walked out of a lot of bad relationships earlier than I did in the past, not just sexual but all types of bad relationships. If it's impossible to get over it then I just want to lose the painful memories. People can be unbelievably cruel. Don't have much else to say, I'm journalling a lot and it helps me deal with it.

Thanks everyone for the support
 
Well I'm 60 now. Stroke survivor, prediabetic and hypertension.

The meds sure slow things down. Back about 5 years ago I was still masturbating to completion three to five times a day. These days its more like I masturbate to completion once in three to five days.

But I still spend way waaay too much time viewing pr0n sites. Just don't have the time to keep going till I cum.

I know frequency of ejacs and even erections will fall off the cliff after ~ 65? Then again I myself may khark it then too as that is the fate of all stroke survivors.

Perhaps it may also be my meds. Not the hypertension (high blood pressure) ones, but the cholesterol tabs.

I did used to curse my constant horniness, my urge to spend countless hours every day wanking. But I worry less about that now. Perhaps because I can feel life ebbing away.

The other thing is, never had a wife, no kids. Kinda feel like a loser [looser? ;)]. Perhaps because I've always wanted, well, a wife, and kids. But I know I have been too sexualised from the get go to settle down with a mainstream girl. Otherwise I've had many opportunities. Just few if any of them were as sexually mad as me. And some were, well, too fetching, as they went after taller, more handsome, and more popular guys. I'm only 166 cm's.

I also clearly have trouble with accepting reality, and have unrealistic ambitions. To this day. Highly unlikely to be realised.

60 And waiting for an 18 year old pale skinned skinny beauty with a brilliant mind to do medicine then neurosurgery (with scholarships!). Yep, its gone past dreaming. Even with the Electra Complex.
 
WhiteSubmissionM said:
I'm pretty much in the same boat as you -- nearing mid-50s, and still trying to recover from a bad TBI . Not like totally disabled or anything, still lift weights, go on long hikes, etc - but have anger issues, anxiety, memory problems, tire easily, things like that. Don't have the money or status to pull something young and fun -- and no way could I get along with a post-menopausal bitchy "Karen" sort of woman, even if I could find one willing to settle for me -- and in my mental state now I doubt I could deal with either.

I still have dreams though ... and like living vicariously through others, happy for them at least having some fun in life. So, if I can't get a white woman, well, I can be happy for the Black men who can (and feel happy for the women too, getting what they really want, even if it means white men lose out -- and, not like I ever would have had a shot at them anyway, haha).
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I need to lift weights. My jogging and walking really tones up my legs. They feel like steel. However the rest of me is flabby.

I actually do the walks to maintain my balance. I'm other wise not much into fitness. I should really get some gym equipment though, as the rest of me is quite flabby.

Maybe get a few kettle bells, and a rack to lift weights. A friend has such equipment but he's at the other end of town. Problem is about ~ 15 years ago I did have quite an array of gym equipment, but then I was working, and well they just gathered dust. So I sold them when I got a job interstate. I fear the same may happen if I get them again. Might buy them used or second hand. Someone trying to offload theirs.
 
wyteshit369 said:
Lol wow. You are all fakers. I hate the white race. Men and women. I only live to serve black kings. Literally! Once i get my inheritance im cutting the rest of my ****** off, feminizing myself for black gods, and will live my life 24/7 A BIMBO WHITEFAG! Until a black king gets rid of me. Smh. OBLM. BNWO. WHITEGENOCIDE. WHITESHAME
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bruh there are people here really hurt by porn abuse. Nobody asked for your opinion.
 
wyteshit369 said:
Lol its a public thread, on a site im a member of, and an open ended statement inviting comments. White people cant be hurt by porn, because we are not people. Whites are trash. You all will get it eventually i hope lol
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i know you are allowed to say it, just saying it's not nice and nobody asked for it. Not every second of your life has to be defined by this kink
 
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