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Let's talk about our descent into addiction

One lonely night during COVID lockdown, i like many guys was addicted to porn. It was late and I was horny. For seemingly no reason I couldn't get the thought of big black cock gangbangs out of my head. Perhaps the years of seeing interracial porn ads had done something to me. I hesitated but gave in to my curiosity. I figured if I really liked this stuff I should go ahead and find out. I should also note I was racist at the time and always thought interracial porn was disgusting up until those thoughts began. I came so fucking hard it scared me. I wouldn't watch again for a while, as I didn't want to like it obviously. But I couldn't get my mind off it. I had never been filled with so desire for porn before. It was so taboo and I felt so much jealousy, I was so uncomfortable with the thought of a black man fucking a white woman and envious of their huge cocks. The fact I was a virgin didn't help either.
It would off and on for months at a time become what I watched exclusively for a year. I would forget about it for a while but always go back. Years passed and now it's all I want. I can't help it, white women getting fucked by big black cock is the most erotic and arousing thing on the planet.
I'm a white nationalist all my friends are supremacists but I also love to watch n*gers fucking our women!
 
I've liked interracial porn for years. I was doing photo montages and pmvs (porn music videos). One day, a black man on internet convinced me to tell my wife about it. It led to sharing my wife. There were suddenly a lot of black guys around us. My ********* were seduced. It's like a tornado sucking in everything around me.
Great, I'm a white supremacist and if I tell my friends about my desires I don't know how they are going to react
 
As a teen, I first found some light captions about ex girlfriends being stolen, which lead to interracial captions. One mentioned bnwo, so I decided to google it. I found a bnwo religious site, and spent 3 hours reading every article they had. At the end was a series of indoctrination style videos meant to instill white guilt, white hate, white inferiority, black excellence, and black worship. I was so taken by their teachings that almost every night i would read the site twice while edging, then listen to the videos on loop while i edged myself to sleep, with the videos still playing in my headphones. I've tried quitting since then, but I always come back.
 
Just keep watching you'll eventually not be able to live without it.
Oh that is so true...Isn't it amazing how it gets you. I saw lots of comments over the years about how it can 'turn' you sexually and I thought no way can it do that. But I love it, love it, love it...I actually dreamt about worshiping a Big Black Cock last night. Just keep watching is my advice too. It seems to creep up on you but you end up wanting to be the "girl" worshipping that Big Black Cock.
 
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