Journal of a Journey - Book Thirty Two

Well, it's like 9:15pm and she's not home yet. I knew she was going to be at Ray’s a bit later tonight as I suspected they'd want some more time together given they haven’t seen each other in a long time. However, we have had a wicked rain storm go by and I was worried enough to call her cell-phone to see if she was okay. When she eventually answered it was to hint that I was ‘interrupting them’ and she hung up with me! That kind of annoyed me at the moment but now I’m kind of horny thinking about what I might have interrupted. I'll be sure to ask her about it tomorrow night...


Suzanna did tell me when I got home that I had called just as they were getting into foreplay for seconds for Ray (and like 5ths or 6ths for her). I apologized but she said it was her fault for not letting me know she'd be so late and with the storm and such, she understood. It was close to 9:30pm when she finally got home. I'd told the kids that she'd been working late and had then gone to see her *** before coming home.

It was after her apology that she said that she was up for a change of pace and while she still wanted to enjoy the post-sex feelings she had from Ray that she asked me if I would still want to go down on her even though we wouldn't be fucking. I told her what I'd always said to her, that I'd love sharing the experience with her even if we didn't have sex. I then admitted that I was still quite drained from our Wednesday night routine.

She smiled and kissed me and said that we could go upstairs and said I'd have to keep things quiet. I laughed and said, "No, it’s you who needs to keep things quiet". In the bedroom I unbuttoned her blouse and unclipped her bra as she slipped out of her jeans. She then asked me if I wanted to take her panties off.

I can't believe how excited I was as I sat on the bed and she stood in front of me. There was a damp stain in the crotch and I was frozen for a moment staring at her pussy and now, finally, I was getting to share this moment with her. She made a coughing sound that drew me out of my trance and I slowly moved my hands up her legs. I looked up at her from sitting and from this angle I could see that her breasts were still reddened from Ray obviously grabbing and sucking at them. It was what was lower that I wanted.

I grabbed the waistband and I slowly pulled them down. Her curly hair appeared and for a moment I'd forgotten that she hasn't shaved yet! It was like getting to undress a girl on a first date, I was so eager to see the rest that I pulled them down all at once. Even through the damp hair was slicked back I could see her swollen pussy lips. They looked wet and from the angle I was at, it looked like they were separated at the bottom and as I sat there for a moment, I swore a glistening drop of what could only be cum appeared. She put a hand on my shoulder as she stepped out of her panties and then said, "We should switch places".

I stood up and she took my place on the bed, as we did so she looked at me, "... this is for me, right?" I nodded my head in agreement and she said, "...okay, I want you to go nice and gentle to start....”

She slid back a bit and allowed me to push her legs back. I think it was a first in so many months that she let me do this.

I leaned forward and was just about to start when she clamped her legs together and told me to ‘get naked’ and to climb up and, "start at my boobs". I was naked in a flash and I got onto the bed and began kissing her lips and then nibbling at her neck behind her ear and then down across her shoulder to the little v just below her neck just above her breasts. From the way she was breathing I knew she was getting turned on by my attention.

She may have wanted me to start up there but she was also still horny herself and my kissing in slow-motion down her body really got her stoked up. No sooner had I sucked at her nips that she put her hands on my shoulders to push me lower.

I moved back to my starting position and this time she was really into it. She slid forward and sort of put her feet behind my neck and pulled me towards her. I needed no such encouragement and with both hands I reached out and spread her pussy apart.

What a change in Suzanna from her attitude long ago, she reached down, pulled her knees back revealing the pussy that Ray just fucked several times earlier. My cock started to throb a bit at seeing how beautiful she looked, so satisfied. Using my index fingers I opened her vagina up and for the first time in so many days not only could I see her beautiful pussy but I could also see what could only be cum still in her.

I began to lick around the edge of her pussy,licking at the damp hair up and down the cleft; gently pushing back at her outer labia to reveal the swollen knob of her clit. I worked my tongue up between the inner labia and could immediately taste the remnants of her earlier fun. It may sound crazy to say this, but the last few weeks of Wednesdays have sharpened my tongue regarding the taste of cum and it turned me on to know that Ray had cum in her and that I was now licking her and tasting it. As I got to her clit she began to moan as I gently licked upwards at it, spreading her sweetness and his tartness all over each time. Within just a few moments her pussy started to contract and then her body began to follow suit like it would sweep over her in a wave. Each wave and contraction seemed to cause more liquid to seep out of her and within just a few moments of this I felt her hand on the back of my head.

From how she guided me and how hard she pulled at my head, I soon learned what she longed to feel and I gave it to her. As I probed the insides of her pussy with my tongue she let out a moan so loud that I had to lift up and remind her to keep it quiet, we’ve got kids in the house!

She held it back for a bit but soon I could just feel it building again in her from how she would pull her legs back and encourage me to push my tongue deep into her to how she squeeze her legs around my head to hold me in place, I could tell she was close. I introduced a finger slowly into her pussy and as I did I gently sucked at her clit and that seemed to finally elicit a huge orgasm from her. She fought for a moment but my finger slipping into the hot wetness in her was something she couldn't fight. I felt her body shake as she clamped her pussy tightly on my finger for a moment as she let out a moan that I knew she was trying to stifle at the same time.

It was most beautiful to witness how she felt and, more so, how she looked as she came down from that orgasm. I moved up next to her and as I held her as she caught her breath she rolled to snuggle up to me. Knowing the contentment she felt at that moment and knowing how close I felt to her, it was great.

She later said that she'd thought of sharing like this with me on Thursday's but it's only since we'd been away that she realized (when I told her) just how drained and how great I feel on Thursdays that she thought this might work out. I admit my cock had grown to near full hardness by this point with her lying next to me, both of us smelling and tasting like sex. She looked up at me and patting my stiff cock said/asked again, "you going to be okay waiting till tomorrow?" I smiled at her and said, "you'd just better be ready for me tomorrow....”

Later as we were getting into and ready for bed she came out and said that she liked how she felt after being with Ray and she thanked me again for waiting. When I said it was okay she came out and patting her pussy said that it turned her on that, "tonight this is just Ray’s" Then she asked me, "should I put panties back on; or will you behave yourself?”

I didn't answer right away for a part of me wanted to tell her to put them back on but I knew it would turn me on that I'd given her oral sex and that she was going to make me wait another day. I guess she didn't need to be a mind-reader for my slight delay in answering gave her the go ahead to tip my chin up to her and say, "it's okay if it turns you on that if I put them back on". She said it just so calmly that I was just taken aback by it. I nodded my head yes and she smiled and said, "It’s okay; you'll have fun taking them off of me tomorrow night when it is your turn". A second or two later she leaned over, reached into my boxers and smiled at me when she felt my hard-on!


It's another different feeling that I'm still getting used to, that I can be open and don't have to ‘fear’ how she'll react to what I would want to say. It's also a new feeling to have her ‘understand’ what I may want to say. All I know is that seeing her climb out of bed, go to her dresser and pull on a pair of panties before climbing back in with me, it was just so erotic to experience. Maybe it is the symbolism but even now a few days later I can remember the intense feeling of sexual arousal that came over me at that moment.

She kissed me when she got back into bed but did not reach over to feel my now rock hard cock. We pulled the covers up and I reached over and gently stroked her hair and touched her shoulder before we both rolled over to sleep. (Well, her at least. I had to wait a bit for my hard-on to subside so I could roll over as I sleep on my stomach most of the time!)


Friday morning she continued the pantie ritual as if Thursday night had never happened. She pranced around the bedroom with just a towel on her head and a pair of panties on and I was hard once again. That was finally relieved later that evening when our ******** had gone out to a movie with her boyfriend and our son had left after dinner and would be staying over at friends for the night.

With the house to ourselves, we opened a bottle of wine and headed up to the bedroom so I could finally reclaim my wife. She undressed down to her panties and then came up to me and said I should take them off. I stood in front of her and instead of pulling them off her I kissed her and put my hand into them. I spread my hand between her legs and she knew what I wanted and she spread her legs a bit. As we kissed I spread her pussy apart and gently began to finger her. I had my middle-finger curled inside her pussy as she began to moan back at me through our kiss. A moment later she was naked lying back on our bed with my fingers now spreading her open to allow my tongue entry. What had been hot and wet with sperm and sweet the night before was now just damp and warm; waiting for me to reheat it.

As I licked at her she started to tell me more about her night with Ray. She finally told me how she was sucking on his cock when her phone rang. She said she was tempted to tell me right then what I'd interrupted but what turned me on was how she said she was holding Ray's cock and stroking it with one hand while she answered my call with the other. After she hung up on me she said that she sucked him once more to full hardness and then climbed up on top of him. She told me how she then ‘fucked him’ for their last time of the night.

We moved to a 69 and then enjoyed a few other positions (she likes a bit of variety and enjoys cumming in different positions) but, ultimately, we both still love missionary position. She loves being able to look up at me as well as to feel just how much I want her. I love feeling her pull her legs back or move around to open up and allow me deeper and deeper into her. As I pushed my hard cock fully into her she told me how after she'd climbed up on top of him that she'd fucked-him till she'd cum; she said something about him being so deep in her as she finally got off. As I started to fuck her she pulled her legs up for me she told me how she lay there on top of him and how he then fucked upwards into her. I had really started to get into fucking her and was totally enjoying feeling her body and feeling her pussy caressing my cock.

She started to tell me how Ray had grabbed at her butt and hips and how she moved to sort of a kneeling position so he ‘could enjoy himself more’. Hearing her telling me how she moved so Ray could enjoy her pussy more really got me going and I swear she felt wetter too as she told me.

As I said, she likes to look up into my eyes as we fuck and when she told me how it felt as Ray fucked her it really got to me and I know she could feel it; her ooh's and aaah's were much more vocal. As she looked up at me she must have known I was getting close because as she looked up at me she said in this cool sexy voice "Ooooh, that feels good." She pulled her legs back a little more for me and then she looked up at me and in the same voice, "it felt so hot when he finally came in me; I could feel him so deep".

I'm not sure what it was exactly at that moment, hearing the excitement in her voice both about re-living it and about teasing me onward, or in my head my thinking about and knowing how he'd enjoyed her so much. Whichever, the second I let my mind go to the moment Ray had cum in her, that was the point where I let go.

Oh man, we've had some good sex at times but I don't think I've cum that much in one load in years. I felt 5 or 6 of what I know were huge jets of cum and midway through my own orgasm, my deep thrusts took her over for one last orgasm herself which resulted in a gush of cum from her pussy as my cock finally deflated. She looked up at me as I caught my breath and giggled, "enjoyed that, did you?”

Afterwards as we lay there we started to talk; it seems so easy after we've just fucked and to talk about most anything. I told her that it I was guessing she'd had fun on Thursday and that we hadn't talked too much about her time with Ray lately. We lay there in the almost darkness, holding hands staring up at the ceiling when she told me about their night together. She said in over a year this had been the longest time she hadn't seen him. I asked how he'd managed and she giggled and said, "Same way as you do, with his right hand!"

I told her that he must have been really happy to see her to which she giggled and told me, “You’re so right; he was!” It was almost surreal how comfortable and relaxed she seemed as she told me that Ray was incredibly horny for their ‘first time’ and how physical he was with her which I know is something that Suzanna likes but doesn't happen all that much with him.

I commented back to her that I could tell (from Thursday night) that he'd enjoyed himself with her. She rolled towards me and held my hand tighter and she said that she'd really enjoyed what I'd done for her the night before, she said that she wasn't sure how I'd be if I wasn't going to get to have sex with her. I told her it was okay and that I enjoyed sharing the moment and experience with her. She took a second but then didn't flinch at all when she said that she was a little concerned about, "just how wet I was." She looked at me, "I wasn't sure you'd want to do that with how much Ray had cum in me". I pulled her close and told her that I didn't care how much there was, that sharing the moment with her was all that I cared about and I joked that she could have a gallon of his cum in her and I wouldn't have cared.

Friday night’s pattern continued through the weekend.


Even after our rousing night on Friday night both of us were still horny again on Saturday. Suzanna even commented that she's had more sex in the past 2 weeks than she has in a long time, including 4 nights in a row ending with a very gentle and passionate round last night.

The other part that I guess I am now coming to terms with is the openness that there now seems to be. Yeah, we may both be reluctant at times but once it does get started, it is so easy to talk to her about anything now.

Like last night. We'd both turned in a little early what with it being Sunday and a work-day coming up but nevertheless once in bed, we both felt the urge and a need. Although I was pretty well satiated from Friday and Saturday, seeing her change out of her clothes as she pulled on her t-shirt (no panties) it got me going again. When she slid into bed I hugged her and she could feel my hardening cock against her. At first she said she wasn't in the mood but there was something in her voice that told me otherwise. I played along with her and said it was okay if she didn't want to have sex and gave her a kiss. She seemed to roll over as if going to sleep and that was when I said, "you going to mind if I take care of myself or should I go in the other room?” Like I said, it's become really easy to talk to her. She waited a moment and then rolled back towards me and said that she'd reconsidered and that, "knowing what you'd be doing made me horny". She rolled towards me and kissed my face and licked against my ear and whispered, "how about you get yourself going and I'll do me?" and for a moment we both lay there masturbating.

A few moments later she said in a hushed voice, "you ready to climb on yet?” I looked over to find her legs spread apart and two or maybe 3 fingers buried in her pussy. I moved to kneel between her legs, loving the fact that she was so beautiful masturbating like that, she opened her eyes and saw me stroking my fully hard cock just inches from her pussy. She handed me the Astroglide and asked me to lube-up as she was a little sore and tender (I probably didn't need to as she'd gotten her fingers all lubed up already). I dripped some onto my cock and stroked it to spread it around as she continued to watch. When she saw that I was ready she pulled her fingers out and before her pussy could close up, I was in. The lube amde it easy and I slid slowly all the way into her, forcibly and deep. As I reached maximum depth she closed her legs against my body, I heard her moan and felt her shake for a moment and I realized she'd just cum. When she let her legs relax, her pussy totally opened up and seemed to have almost no friction. The lube and her own juices now mixed in made sure of that.

I sank all the way into her and held her tightly. I felt like the hand in her glove to coin a phrase, we fit together perfectly. My hard cock felt incredibly buried in her and as we held and hugged and kissed each other I started to fuck her. Her eyes opened wide as I pushed all the way into her driving her up the bed a bit and they opened even wider as I pulled back out of her almost all the way before doing it again. This time her eyes closed as our bodies came together and I could feel her thrusting her body up towards mine grinding her pussy against me each time. Each time I'd pull back she'd let out a low moan that slowly got louder and louder each time. It may have been forceful as I pushed into her but it was also just incredibly loving as she was literally begging me to push into her as deep as I could.

After just a few more minutes of grinding away at her I could definitely feel her pulling her knees back and instead of her feet being on the bed she was now she was pulling her knees back towards her breasts and encouraging me to fuck her deeper. I could feel she was building towards another orgasm, her head began to thrash back and forth and words became grunts and moans. I could feel it in her as the deepest recesses of her vagina began to grab at my cock and then release, throbbing in a way but at the same time seeming to almost milk my cock inside her. It was exquisite to pull out of her, see just how wet and open she was and then to hear her plea to ‘fuck me deep’ again.

I began by both loving and caring but by now, she just wanted me to fuck the heck out of her. Her legs lewdly spread didn't need my help to push or hold them back; her dark pubes all matted down but mostly her luscious pussy now swollen open and seeming to gulp down my cock as I bottomed out in her.

She began to push up against me and by now my balls were boiling. As she started to cum I could feel her whole body spasm including her pussy going from a death-grip one second to a gaping cavern the next. As her head thrashed about I looked down at her under me and that was it, it wasn't a huge load but it felt scalding hot and intensely satisfying to let go in her. She squealed as I came in her (apparently the hot sensation wasn't lost on me) and then locked her legs around me till we both came down.

We'd gone from falling-asleep to intense-fuck in all of about 10 minutes and instead of being tired at 10:30pm, both of us now seemed wired and awake. She rolled over to her side towards me and giggled at what we'd just done so quickly. After a quick kiss she put her head on my chest and we lay there together for a bit but then she reached down to my soft wet cock and she did what she usually does after I've cum, she reached down below my balls and ran her thumb all the way up. I moaned as she reached the tip but looked down and saw that she'd drawn a thick glob of cum out of my now flaccid cock. She smiled and laughed as she moved up on one elbow and brought her fingers up. "Do you want it?" she asked me; I answered by pulling her hand towards me and licking her fingers off. She looked at me and said, "It turns me on that you don't mind doing that...." I answered,"I only do it for you".

Suzanna brought me a washcloth from the bathroom and after I'd finished with it she went back in to the washstand. I'm guessing that I must have cum more than I'd thought as I watched her again put one foot up on the toilet and watched her clean up her pussy. She turned and saw me watching and she turned herself so I could see more.

When she got back into bed was when we talked a bit more. We shared a bit of closeness in the afterglow and after exchanging compliments on the surprise fuck she kissed me and said she was going to wait till tomorrow morning to put panties back on. I told her that was fine and she kissed me and said, "It turns you on huh?" I nodded my head .She got up on one elbow and said in this loving voice, "would you tell me about it?” I kind of hemmed and hawed for a moment until she said, "its okay if you don't want to" and after a moment she said, "I'll tell you something in exchange if you want"?

So, it was obvious she wanted to hear it. I took a deep breath and I told her that I thought it was the symbolism of it that turned me on. She said, "Okay, what do you mean?" to egg me on to continue. So I told her that in a way the panties seemed to symbolize to me that she wanted to keep herself for Ray and I told her that in my head, it turned me on to think of her as thinking that it's Ray’s until the end of the week. She asked me if I was surprised at what she'd done on Thursday and I told her that I had missed sharing that moment with her, sharing her time with Ray with her. She repeated what she'd said, that she wasn't sure our time on Wednesday would leave me in a place that I could be with her on Thursday nights but still be okay about not having sex with her. I told her that letting me go down on her like that was so exciting, that after 4 days of not seeing her pussy, that the short and limited time she gave me was incredibly exciting. She giggled and said she could tell from how I was afterwards. That was when I told her how exciting and turned-on I got when she put her panties back on and made me wait till Friday. She smiled and said that it gave her a very strong sexual thrill when she put them back on afterwards.

I told her that it was awesome that she shared her enjoyment with me but that she wanted to also keep some of it for herself. She hugged me and said she couldn't believe I was this understanding for a long time. I told her that her wearing panties like that turned me on because it was a visual reminder that she shares her pussy with Ray. She told me she likes that I think of it that way, that she, "shares her pussy with Ray" which she followed up by saying, "maybe you can have me orally on Thursdays from now on .... would you like that?" I moaned back an emphatic "yes". A moment later she giggled a little and said in a hushed voice, "then I guess you'll get to see how much he cums in me". I was about to say something when she said, "I wasn't sure you'd really want that" and when I started to say, "yeah, of course, I...." she sort of cut me off and said, "sometimes he cums a lot .... just so you know .... you can say no if you don't want to, you know....". That was when I pulled her close to me and I told her that I thought she was the sexiest most awesome wife in the world and that I loved sharing all of what she does with her and I told her very explicitly that I would always love to share, "no matter how much Ray may cum in you." I repeated the ‘gallon of cum’ comment to her which made her giggle and hug me back.

As we hugged and kissed I cupped her pussy with my hand and I told her in the most loving supportive voice I could that, "I love that you let other guys cum in you...." A second later I added, "it turns me on so much to think about...."

She kissed me and looked up at me and said, "do you want me to put them back on now; would you like to fall asleep knowing I am now Ray’s again?” I knew she said it as a turn-on to me and nothing more but yet I knew my hand had felt wonderful against her damp pussy too. Is it crazy to say that my cock got hard again as I thought about it? If that's not crazy then my answer to her of ‘yeah’ shouldn’t surprise anyone. She kissed me, hugged me for a second and said, "it's okay, I understand, it turns me on too" and she got up out of bed, went over to her dresser and in the dim light I could see her step into a pair of panties. A second later she climbed back into bed, hugged me and kissed me and said, "thank you."

I asked, "for what?" and she said, "for being honest" and then she took my hand, put it on her now pantie-covered pussy and said ,"you'll see it again later this week". Before she rolled away from me she reached over and into my boxers and she looked up at me when she felt that I was almost fully hard and kissed me and said, "you weren't lying!”

So it seems that we may have a new routine in the build here; the next week will tell.


I remember her ‘moments’ quite clearly but having them alone in my head is one thing, it is her actual re-living those same moments with me that is now giving me these awkward feelings. Even though I've been there together with them many times, it is still different to me when I think at various times that my wife has been in this same position or experience with Ray now.

Is any of it anything new? No, not really. I've felt some of this before but somehow the reality of spending several days alone with her as Ray did and then as I just did, seeing her so totally sexually wanting ,I think the closest I can say it feels is how I felt when she used our marital bed with another guy. I guess it is how it feels when I know she's given him something that had truly been between just us two before.

Those thoughts have become easier to deal with in the time since the thought of them waking up together and sharing moments like those are now feeling less threatening and definitely more arousing to me now.

That said, they are things I will just have to get used to. I know it's somewhat irrational given that it is really the only thing I seem to have some apprehensive feelings about.


I thought I should mention that our usual Wednesday night routine has resumed. Suzanna sat Indian-style next to me and I could just see the outline/impression of her pussy through her panties. I was quite horny the first time, needing little encouragement to get started. She admitted as I was masturbating that the thought of seeing me cum (as I soon would be) turned her on a lot. I told her that I knew it did and that was when she said it again, that seeing me cum and her knowing it wasn't going in her turned her on. I didn't ask questions as she'd already gotten me quite turned on and I noticed that her hardened pebble-like nipples confirmed what she was saying.

There used to be a time when I was a little shy to masturbate in front of her. It was one thing to do it as part of foreplay or a shared sexual moment but I have to say that I have at times felt like I am performing for her. It has gotten easier to let myself go including arching my back and moaning out loud as I get myself off and this time was no different and soon I let it go. She squealed as I started to cum and she reached out to cup my balls as I stroked the next few squirts. I swear I think she almost came herself just watching me. After a few moments she didn't even need to ask me, she just started pooling up my cum onto her fingers and it seemed like our normal experience together for me to lick them off.

It's at moments like that I realize just how far Suzanna and I have come. Just a few years ago she would have handed me a wad of tissues and had a bit of disdain in her voice. Now she coos in my ear how erotic she thinks it is.

What was different about Wednesday night wasn't that it was her that asked me about an hour or so later whether I ‘wanted to go again’. I hemmed and hawed a bit and she cajoled me and reminded me how much easier it is on me to wait after we do this together. I liked how she said it was us doing this together so I gave in (I really didn't need that much coaxing) and let her watch me again. Again as I got closer she started again to tell me how it seemed to turn her on to see me cum. This time it was me who repeated, " ... and that it's not going in you?” She didn't really answer but she pulled up closer to me and gave me this sexy moan in my ear.

I was about ready to cum and she knew it, looked up at me and said, "let me help you". She took my hand off my cock and I thought she was going to stroke me but instead she leaned forward and sucked my cock into her mouth! The sensation was incredible; all of a sudden I felt the intense warm sucking feeling and her tongue slowly slithering up the bottom of my cock up to the tip. I would have cum in her mouth had she gone down again but instead she pulled back and put my hand back and said, "see if that helps".

My cock was slippery from her mouth and in just a moment or two, damn, did I let loose! She squealed out loud at that and again, I think she might have even cum as I saw her panties become a bit darkened in the crotch. Nonetheless, a few moments later as I lay there I felt her hands again scraping and guiding all of my semen towards my navel where she scooped it up and let me again lick her fingers clean.

I'm also going to admit something now and say that these past Wednesdays and last Thursday I'm starting to get to really enjoy the taste and sensation of cum. Lately, whenever I've been masturbating instead of squirting it off into a tissue or whatever, I admit it, I've been catching it in my palm and then licking it off myself. Even now re-typing this it struck me how different my first and second loads of cum tasted. It is something that is just so intense to share with and do in front of your wife. She herself has never flinched at sucking on mine or her fingers or any of her toys or any cocks that have been in her pussy either.

However, this Wednesday took a bit of a different turn when about 11:30pm when I was quite content to turn over and fall asleep after having cum twice Suzanna rolled up next to me and kissed my neck and half-giggled/half-moaned that she wanted to watch me one more time. I was so not into it and I told her so, that I didn't want to get my cock sore or whatever. She smiled, rolled towards her nightstand and then rolled back and handed me the Astroglide and said, "Use this".

I'd used lubes before when I'd masturbated but this was a first and it sort of turned me on to give it a try. I told her that I was pretty well drained already and she giggled and said she'd help and again she leaned over and sucked me! That hardened me up more quickly and, sure enough as I stroked, she dripped a few drops of lube onto my moving hand.

Wow, it's been a while since I used a lubricant and I felt myself truly getting into this, the 3rd time. She dripped more and more lube onto me and said, "that's what I do with my toys too". The mental image of her fucking herself with a well lubricated dildo stuck in my mind and, sure enough a few minutes later, my slick hand did in fact get me to #3.

From the intense feelings there should have been a pool of molten lava on my stomach afterwards but when I opened my eyes and looked, instead, there was one sort of thick milky spurt followed just some very thick dribbling down my hand. Nevertheless, I could hear the low moan from her as she saw and felt me cum which was pretty neat to share.

I always feel really close to Suzanna after we share our Wednesday night ritual. It's weird but feeling her hugging me or me spooning with her afterwards feels very close and loving. She admitted that not feeling my hard cock poking at her as we fall asleep does make her feel better that I'm not being denied some pleasure while she has her own fun. She said some other stuff but I think I was half asleep as she was rambling on.


Thursday morning followed the same ritual. It almost feels normal now for her to be wearing panties most of the week. I have to say that not seeing her bare pussy during the week is profoundly arousing to me. Whatever it is, whether it’s what the panties ‘say to me’ or knowing that Ray will get to take them off of her first, I'm not sure but that thought continues to be incredibly (and I do mean incredibly) arousing. That my wife will not let me see her pussy before her lover has had sex with her, it turns me on just to think about it.

She was late again on Thursday night. Her *** is a good excuse as she plays it up that this is her night to stay with him late when in fact she sees him from late-afternoon and then goes to Ray’s about 6:30pm. Last night she came in just after 10pm. Our ******** had a girlfriend over so she was oblivious and our son wouldn't be home till much later.

I didn't know if last week was a fluke or the start of something new but when she came home Thursday night and kissed me I could taste what could only be cock on her breath. Not cum, but definitely her mouth and face had that musky odour about them. She pulled back and said, "do you want to go upstairs like we did last week?” I don't know what I said exactly but she laughed at my enthusiasm and as I began walking up the stairs and dragging her behind me she said, "Are you okay with the same as last week?"

I stopped her at the top of the steps and said, "what do you mean?” For a second the awesomely sexy moment was broken as she took a second and then said quietly, "I don't want to have sex with you tonight". She said it plainly, quietly, but at the same time, was totally serious. I took a second and then pulled her close to me, kissed her passionately and said, "I know" and then pulled her to the bedroom.

The moment the door was closed the sexy mood totally returned and she held me before she'd let me undress her. She kissed me and said, "I am so lucky; I love you". I hugged her back and gave her a quick ‘Love you too’ in return but in truth at that moment, I really wanted to get her naked.

I don't think I ever told her of my ‘first date’ analogy to how I feel when I undress her; never knowing what I'll find underneath. When I got down to her panties and was about to pull them off I joked, "still curly?" She laughed and said, "yes, but Ray asked when I was going back to bare!". With that she put her legs up and I pulled the panties over her butt and up and off her legs. For a moment she lay there on her back, legs together, straight up in the air like a dancer. Then she slowly parted them and revealed herself fully to me.

OMG, why does it turn me on so much to see her pussy after it's been used by Ray or whoever? Her swollen reddened pussy lips were visible between the curly hair that surrounded them. As she spread her legs, her lips pulled apart and revealed her well fucked vagina ... and it was definitely well fucked. It looked open, wet and even kind of heated. I moved up next to her, kissed her and then worked my way back down. As I kissed my way past her breasts I felt her hand on the back of my head and shoulders. She said something that I didn't totally hear. Later I found out that she'd said she now wondered why she'd not let me do this to her earlier. As I started to lick at the top of her cleft she started to moan and said quietly, "I need to cum once more baby".

It'd been well over an hour or more since she'd fucked Ray and there was no creaminess left to see but that didn't matter, she pulled back her legs even more and bore down to squeeze more of his cum out of her.

Maybe it's from me eating more of my own but it felt great licking at her oozing pussy and tasting cum in her even if it wasn't my own, knowing she'd taken it into her pussy in the middle of an orgasm she'd shared with Ray. In my head, that made it her cum as much as it was his.

I can't say I have any desire to suck a guy, I just don't. There's no eroticism in that for me although I suppose it'd be exciting and different that's for sure but the thought of sucking his cock isn't something that turns me on at all. Which is odd to say because the fact that I don't mind licking up the cum he leaves in her seems totally counter-intuitive. I think for me, it's like I said, knowing he left it in her in the middle of both of their orgasms makes it somehow totally erotic to me.

Whatever, she was quite wet and however many times he'd cum in her, well, it seemed to be a moment that we were sharing that would last a long time. I pulled back from her pussy several times to just look at her, up close or farther back, I swear I felt pride seeing her naked body beneath me and knowing she'd fucked Ray several times just hours earlier.

I looked up at her and said, "remember when we used to fuck a lot; sometimes during the day at work". She giggled. I added, "I guess it wasn't just me" and she kind of was quiet but moaned her agreement anyway. I looked up at her face over her pubic mound and asked, "what did you do back then?"

She got up on her elbows and looked down at my face looking back at her from between her legs and said, "Huh? What do you mean?” I just went for it, I said, "how did you manage when I used to cum this much in you at lunch time; what did you do all afternoon?”

She rolled her head back and giggled at me, "if you must know, if I was really messy I would have to just get a wad of toilet-paper or maybe buy a pad in the women’s room. Does that answer your question?”

I was looking her right in the face when I said, "oh, just wondering. I remembered you had seen Dan a lot too and had wondered."

She said, "now you know ... " and a second later she said, " ... now get back to work" and giggled as she lay back down onto the bed.

It didn't take me long to get her to orgasm after that little discussion. Her own mind must have been racing because just a short while later she came to a rousing orgasm that left her breathing heavily and afterwards, I heard her make a dreamy sounding, "Mmmmm thank you ....”

Last night was ‘our night’. She lay back and kissed me and told me many times again how lucky she was and as she spread her legs she looked at me and said, "Tonight this is all yours".


Friday night and perhaps it’s the openness of things lately but I am finding that by the time it is ‘my turn’ that even with the masturbation on Wednesdays by Friday night I am totally horned up again! Suzanna noticed and made several clear comments on how our ‘new fun’ seems to be making me so much hornier! Even to one point of voicing concern over how physical and forceful I was being with her.

At one point I pulled her up to her knees and she put one leg down on the floor and the other knee on the bed. I got behind her in much the same position, one of my knees on the bed and my other foot on the floor, and whatever it was, damn, did we fit well together. Her pussy seemed to open up and seemed to have no end that I could feel. She'd lean her head and shoulders down into the bed and thrust her pussy upwards back towards me. She screamed into the pillow when I held her hips and slammed into her.

But in the end there's one position she loves best, missionary. My cock felt like it was a foot long from the position she assumed with her legs pulled all the way back and apart. I dripped some lubricant directly into her pussy and then plunged in after it. The sensation of pulling back from deep in her and spreading the slippery wetness was similar to sloppy-seconds and in my head that was enough to really get me going. I managed to hold on long enough for her to have an intense orgasm after which her pussy was soft, wet and open so deep that for a little while, as she came down from her peak passion, I could barely feel her at all. As she recovered she brought her legs closer together and put her feet around by back and encouraged me to ‘cum already’.

Her voice combined with a million thoughts in my head brought me to a raging climax a moment later. She moaned loudly and pushed up against me to prevent me from fucking her too deeply and forcibly but it didn't matter to me, feeling her pussy sucking at my cock like that was all I needed. Damn, that was one awesome fuck and, like I said, the way we both seem to cum only reinforces all the other things we've been doing.


We were quite busy around here on Saturday such that later that evening, all we wanted was to sit around with a bottle of wine out on the porch till we were almost asleep!

Last night though we were quite amorous. We both seemed to be very turned on by the teasing of it going back to being ‘Ray’s pussy’. Starting today, no, actually starting last night when after we'd had sex and cleaned up that she pulled on a pair of panties. That was after we'd both struggled to keep the sounds of our passion quiet from our ******** asleep across the hall including both her hissing loudly as she held back a scream and my own loud moaning next to her head into the pillow as I came deeply in her.

Damn my cock is hard already thinking about it again.


We continued talking about the whole pantie-thing and Suzanna brought up how our ‘Wednesday night fun’ (as she puts it) seems to fit right in. The discussion actually started on Friday night as she'd teased me about it being ‘Ray’s pussy’ and she continued through the weekend up to last night where, as I said, I think the whole subject had gotten us both very worked up.

In thinking about it, I suppose I should have watched what I was saying a bit more. Earlier I'd often thought that I'd telegraphed my desires to Suzanna in a round-about way to make sure they were her own desires too. Maybe I should have been a bit more tight-lipped but again, the ease at which I seem to be able to talk to her (and for her to respond to me too) as well as I guess, losing the fear of saying or suggesting something that could weird-her-out.

She opened up to me and said that for herself, now she was finally able to see and understand what gets me aroused, that she's been able to understand herself too. It took a while for her to get to the point that she finds herself being turned on through the whole pantie-thing. Yes, knowing it turns me on is a huge comfort for her that she doesn't have to feel she's crazy by what she is learning about herself. She came out and said that when she thinks about what she is doing, consciously withholding herself from me, that it really turns her on.

I asked her if that was because she was falling for Ray or something like that. She said, "It’s not that; it's not him ... " then she was quiet for a moment, " ... it's that I'm not letting you see or have me" and she admitted that our Wednesday nights have only reinforced it!

She said she'd tried to tell me it for a while now, that seeing me cum like that on Wednesdays, seeing my cum just spurt away onto my stomach; that somehow it really really turns her on that she is helping me literally empty my balls and that when she sees all the cum that didn't go into her, that it really turns her on.

I repeated what I'd already said, that it turned me on too and I asked her if there was anything more to it. She said she didn't know, that all she could really say was that it seemed to give her this crazy sexual feeling when she'd see me cum like that. She was a bit quiet when she then admitted that it made her feel very close to me that she'd let me lick her fingers off afterwards and how it gave her an incredible feeling of closure (that's how she put it).

I told her more of what I'd already told her but also added, again, maybe mistakenly, that it turned me on that I was masturbating because she didn't want me to cum in her and I admitted that her panties seemed to convey that it was in fact ‘Ray’s pussy’ when she had them on. She had denied that several times but when it came up again yesterday she relented and said that despite her disbelief that this is really her, she admitted that it wasn't so much that it was ‘Ray’s-pussy’ but more that for that period of time that it wasn't mine! She told me that in her head, that she was preserving herself like this for her lover was the turn-on, not that she wanted to feel like she belonged to Ray or anything like that. What she did say was that it gave her the feeling that she was in control and that my masturbating for her was part of that control; that she was the one to decide who and when her pussy would get used. There was also mention of how she felt a certain arousal at defying the whole traditional catholic upbringing that she'd had where she was supposed to satisfy her husband.

It was very eerie to hear her say all of this. She looked at me and asked if this was some of what turned me on when she was away with Ray, whether it was sort of like what I feel from her wearing panties. I told her it was similar in a way.

She asked me if I liked that feeling. She came out and said it, of her giving Ray something that she was denying me.

How could I say no when it was true? I told her that since we'd started this and since we'd talked openly about it that I'd found myself feeling incredibly turned on when Friday came around. That's when she said again what she'd said about Thursday nights, that she didn't want it to be something that tormented me or whatever. She didn't understand when I told her that it was something that I enjoyed very much even it if did make me want her a bit. At least she didn't until I told her that it wasn't just the Thursday evening but it was the whole thing leading up to our time together on Friday that was what did it for me. In a way, I told her, it seems like 4 days of foreplay! She laughed at that suggestion.


After we'd fucked last night she put on her panties again and as we lay in bed she held my hand and asked me how I'd react now to the things that Dan had wanted. I turned to her and asked why she was asking, whether she had any lingering feelings for him, etc. She quickly and immediately said she never wanted to see him again but she also added that, "some of what he'd wanted, well, thinking back at it now, does seem exciting".

I held her hand and pulled her to me and told her that if there was something she ‘wanted’ that I wanted it to come from her and be something she wanted and that I was sure we could make it work. As I hugged her I ran my hands down her body and it gave me such a thrill to feel her panties beneath her t-shirt and she knew it. She hugged me and pulled me close and said she loved me and how lucky she was.

This morning and we followed what's become our normal routine now. She will always look at me in the mirror and smile as she pulls up her panties beneath the towel around her waist.

I'm not scared of what's going on, maybe I’m feeling a little apprehension, but if there's anyone I want to experience all of it with, it's her.


We are taking a ****** vacation from Wednesday to Saturday morning before Labor Day - going to the ‘Joisy shore’ and staying with friends at their beach-house.

I am already preparing myself mentally for what I expect to be coming up after that. She hasn't mentioned it but she also hasn't said it's not happening so I am expecting her to say she wants to go away with Ray again. It's amazing that it's almost 3 months ago already that she went to the wedding with him and despite all the misgivings and such things have only seemed improve between us afterwards. As I said earlier, when I don't think about the misgivings I had, the sex part of her being with him is still incredibly arousing to me and I can replay so many of those moments in my head and still be turned on by them.

Her arousal at our Wednesday night fun is obvious and she knows I enjoy it too. I've often said that I would go along with her denying me for a longer period knowing how much it turns her on. The thing is though; I'm a little scared to think it's something I'm going to enjoy in a perverse way! I'd also say that perhaps it scares me even more to think that maybe this is something I've wanted to experience all along!


Last night was interesting as it seems that Suzanna has seized that time as when she will ask or say things that she seems to have waited for. I've said that my stiff cock often seems like a lie-detector of sorts.

No secret here to say that I absolutely look forward to our Wednesday night fun. It may sound weird but I definitely enjoy this routine and even find myself getting horny in the evening thinking about masturbating for her later on.

It started much as usual, she came out of the bathroom in her night-shirt and panties underneath and sat Indian-style on the bed next to me and she seemed very pleased that I am so into doing this with her. I slid down my boxers and she smiled broadly that my cock was already stiff and that I needed little to no prompting to start stroking for her. I do like thinking about that I am doing it for her.

She was very sexy as she encouraged me. During the build-up to my first time she said a lot of different things including how happy she was that she now feels that she can share Thursday's with me and that in a way she connects my orgasms on Wednesdays with the happiness she feels sharing Thursdays with me. She asked me to tell her how I felt on Thursdays and specifically, what I was feeling when I am masturbating . I could tell what she wanted to hear and it turned me on to go along with her desires. I was honest and she could tell by how my cock and my hand on my cock responded.

It did feel a little odd to tell her it was more of a turn-on than anything else that I loved going down on her pussy when she gets home after seeing Ray. I told her that I thought it was incredibly exciting to spread her legs and dip my tongue into her pussy and to taste Ray's cum in her. She moaned at my comment and was even louder when I told her that I would often as I am licking her to think about Ray’s cock being buried deep in her as he came in her. I told her that when I could feel her pussy spasming as I licked at it that knowing Ray had felt that with his cock in her was incredibly sexy for me to think about.

She encouraged me to go on saying that hearing me saying all of this made her feel even better about what she was doing and that she loved ‘sharing the moment’ with me this way. She again said that she'd been concerned that I'd be feeling some sort of desire that she'd feel guilty about causing.

I made her giggle when I said that I wished she'd be able to get home in time for it to be a little more ‘creamy’ and she teased back that she knew I'd like that. As she said, "from how you enjoy cleaning up tonight" meaning how she likes that I lick off her hands and fingers on Wednesday nights.

As I got closer to my first orgasm last night she cooed in my ear again that she loved watching me cum and again teased about me ‘not cumming in her’. She asked me to tell her how I felt knowing that Ray was going to have her next. As I started to tell her how I felt, horny, aroused thinking about it as ‘Ray’s pussy’ she made a moan at my comments and that just sent me off. She squealed and I swear it sounded like she'd even had an orgasm herself as she watched me and hearing her squeal spurred me on and I think even got another spurt or two out of me!

When I finally stopped stroking I lay back to catch my breath and that now brings about another new kind of feeling. Before I used to feel weird, maybe embarrassed or something like that lying there with my limp cock and cum dripping off my hand and all over my stomach/chest, but last night, I can't explain it fully, it seemed so normal. I noticed that Suzanna was breathing heavily too and when she'd calmed down she kissed me and said, "Ready?" I nodded, "uh huh" and again it just felt and seemed so normal for her to start to scrape together my cum and to feed it to me. I will also openly admit that while I've never shied away from tasting or eating cum, these past few Wednesdays have moved me to where I actually want to clean it up and, dare I say, even to enjoy the taste!

As I licked her fingers clean she told me how horny all of this made her, as she put it, "that we can share your cum this way". She continued to scoop up my semen she casually asked me whether, "Ray’s tastes like yours?"

What a weird conversation to have with your wife although at the moment, it didn't seem odd at all. As I licked her finger off I told her that just like mine, the taste changes all the time. She seemed surprised when I told her that my first time tonight will probably taste different from the second time. She said she didn't know and hadn't realized that. She picked up my limp cock to collect some more of my cum and I added that, "a lot of the time my 3rd time will taste much more bitter". I don't know what she thought of that comment but it seemed to turn me on a little more telling her that.

She kissed me after I'd licked her fingers the last time and she said it turned her on to taste cum in my mouth and she said it turned her on also on Thursday nights when I'd do the same.

As I expected it wasn't long before Suzanna rolled over towards me and said, "so, are you ready to go again big guy?" I liked her light-hearted tease and she smiled when I slid down the covers and she could see I was already growing.

She told me she liked how all of this was going and asked me openly how I felt about things. I told her honestly that while I did have some concerns and I mentioned the awkward feelings I'd had after they'd gone away together but I also told her that she'd done so much to make me realize that it'll be okay and I told her that I actually felt closer to her. She hugged me and said that she wasn't sure about all that she's feeling but she did say that she feels energized and ‘up’ about how she feels and that she is still coming to understand all that she's feeling. She said that she loves that I can let her grow like this and not be threatened.

I looked at her and asked if I should feel threatened and she slid down and hugged me and said that she too feels so much closer to me than she'd ever thought possible. As she hugged me she said she loved me more than ever and that, no matter what, she knew that this was all just something she wants to explore and that she doesn't ever connect it with ‘us’. I can't recall exactly what she said but it was something about wanting to experience it as it happens, not to force things to happen but to go along with whatever was going on. It wasn’t so much what she said that I remember, but how she said it, the emotional connection that I felt with her that gave me the most awesome feeling. She said that I shouldn't feel threatened by anything and that she was sorry if she'd given me these awkward feelings and such. I told her it was me and my responses and that again, afterwards, they are more of an arousal than anything else.

I can see it now how she set this up in her head but it went right by me last night. As I started to stroke for the second time she started to talk and tease me and ask me how I'd felt while she was away with him. When I replied I know she didn't hear the apprehension or awkward feelings that I'd felt but instead she'd gotten me focused on the horny thoughts and arousal that I still feel from it all and that's what I started to tell her.

I told her that when I thought about them together, alone, and how open I know she was with him that it turned me on. I told her that I get a lot of the same feelings from her wearing panties; that it turned me on that she was ‘his’ sexually.

She picked up on what I was saying and the conversation drifted to how they'd shared the daily ‘ritual’ things, the waking, washing and dressing. She knew what she was doing and she emphasised the intimacies, the sexual thought for them all. She told me how she would look in the mirror in the bathroom as she stood there naked washing or brushing her teeth and she could see him lying on the bed in the other room. I told her that those thoughts and the knowledge that she would soon go back to bed and share herself totally with him just drove me crazy with desire.

She giggled as she looked at my ‘huge’ throbbing cock saying, "I can see that!”

She took that as a signal to start slowly teasing and to ask me about her going away with him again. She told me how she liked the feeling of being someone else for a while and letting herself go so freely. I told her it turned me on to think of her that way and that was when she said it. "So, are you going to be okay if we go away again?”

I stopped stroking for a moment and she immediately added, "I'm not sure when but will it be okay if I do? I want to be sure it's okay for you." Before I could say anything she kissed me.

Now I was pretty horny at this point and a bunch of thoughts went through my mind; should I confront her and make a bigger deal of it; should I ignore it; should I say okay and continue on with our "second round"? Looking back it was obvious what my answer was going to be, I said, "I'm sure it'll be okay".

She smiled really broadly at that and leaned down and said, "you are the best; now let’s get you to cum again!” and with that she sat up and pulled off her t-shirt revealing her delicious breasts and her rock-hard nipples.

I was horny and I went with it. I asked her if she was looking forward to ‘getting well fucked’ again.

She giggled and gave back a dreamy moan.

I told her it would definitely turn me on to think of her doing that again.

She said it will be different from when we go away together. She said she hoped I understood that without the love she feels for me, without feeling the love, that it seemed to let her enjoy the physical aspects of sex with Ray even more.

We talked like that for a few more moments but the more I said and admitted to her, the hornier it made me! I know it was the heat of the moment but when she said that she wanted to feel Ray like that again when we were being so sexual with each other, it really struck me that she wanted that kind of intensity again with him. I know it should have scared me to see her like that but instead, oh my god, it turned me on so.

I went with it and told her that it turned me on that he'd fucked her so much in such a short period of time. She moaned remembering it and said back that it'd been a long time since she'd cum like that too. I told her that I'd often thought about how much Ray had cum in her that weekend and she cooed back about how erotic she felt with him afterwards knowing how much he'd cum too. It was hearing her again say how physical she felt her orgasms to be with him that set me off for the second time.


Last night, oh my god, the fires were stoked to an inferno between us. She was quite horny despite already having had quite a time with Ray and I swear my cock felt like it had grown a foot and was a thick as a can of soda from the way we felt together. For the first time in a long time she squirted during one of her orgasms while I was behind her. It was the most awesome sensation to feel her juices between us and running down her legs.

The intensity of our Friday nights seems to only have increased in the past few weeks. Perhaps it's because she is now so willing to share the details of her Thursdays with me that affects us and we are both more wanton by Friday. Whatever, it is astounding that after this long together that we can both literally wear each other out to the point that after I get my last spurt of cum in her that we both collapse exhausted on the bed!

She continues to tease me about Ray, it’s ‘Ray’s pussy’ all the time. I know she says it to turn me on and not out of any sense of desire for Ray and she could immediately tell that it worked. Another time she lay back below me as I knelt between her legs she pulled her legs back to spread her pussy open and she let me watch her masturbate for a few moments making no qualm of showing me her pussy opening up. What got to me was when she said in a sexy voice, "Ray likes watching me do this". OMG, you cannot imagine how that got to me. My cock seemed to grow in all directions and I swear I felt the base of my cock throb with desire.

It seems crazy but thinking of her so openly sharing that moment with not just me but with Ray; why does that turn me on so much? I sometimes wish it didn't but it does. I could feel my cock throbbing as she gently slipped her finger in and out of her wet hole and rubbed it all around her swollen clit. Each time she'd swirl her finger around, her pussy would spasm shut and then reopen looking wetter and stickier inside. I thought I could hear it call my name!


Whilst things have become much clearer to me now, I just wish I understood why it turns me on that she wants to experience these new things. To do them with someone else before then sharing them with me.

I am sure it is why it turns me on to think of them going away together. In a crazy way it does turn me on intensely to think about her sharing every moment with him and maybe even more that he will give her these memories and not me; that she'll come home satiated from him; that she will willingly give herself to him knowing I'll be home waiting for her. Yeah, it turns me on incredibly.

I can almost see in my mind them sleeping together, naked and sticky from sex the night before and during the night. My cock is like a rock thinking of her waking and getting out of bed naked, feeling so comfortable with him for her to not even feel the least bit modest. Then I think about the other things like the intimate moments than them holding hands walking through a small town or sight-seeing together.

I can't explain it. It's not just that they're having sex, I've been there and have been a part of that, and it is to me that she is giving something to him and not to me.

But it is very much what I want, and that's what is crazy to realize, that I seem to be incredibly aroused at the thought of her sharing with someone else instead of me. I know it is why I encouraged her to do so many things that seemed so crazy or extreme at the time.

I've read back through all of my previous writings and there are moments when each one of them is enough to almost get me to cum just from re-living them. Going backwards, I see them all as giving me the same incredible intense sexual rush that is almost as intense just re-reading them.

Such as my enjoying and even in a way, asking for her to wear her panties to deny me now. It turns me on so....

Her going away with Ray to the wedding was one thing and, looking back, it seems so obvious that not only was she going to ask but that I was surely going to say yes no matter what.

Her leaving her rings at home. Even something non-sexual (yes, but very symbolic, I know) like that is something I wanted her to feel.

Then when I encouraged, telling and even my asking her to give Ray the first time with her truly without any birth control.

I've re-read and masturbated to that memory so many times. How crazy is it to want her to share that moment with him? The first time of her having sex in over 20 years (since we had kids) totally without birth-control after her IUD was removed. I don't know why but knowing she did that is giving me a hard-on just typing this.

It's obvious that I wanted her to give in to Dan's wishes but, really, was it that or was it my desire to be denied? I am so comfortable in now admitting this to Suzanna (or whoever) that is it any wonder I enjoyed what Dan had pushed her to, to be with him for so many days in a row or to begin to truly make it formal that she wanted to deny me.

I read back at how I didn't resist her saying no to me before she would see him and yes, damn does my cock nearly burst when I read of what I felt of her torment when he'd asked for her to be exclusively his. I will say that I was totally scared to let it go further then but now? I don't know. Even before then when I read-back to her first overnight with Peter, I know I hated it at the time but now, thinking of how she must have felt sharing those intimate moments for the first time and learning of her own sexuality, I’m not sure.

It seems almost obvious though when I read back to how I felt with all of the things she'd done with Peter. I remember I freaked out that she'd shown him how to insert her diaphragm and that all of that led to her getting an IUD for a while. It turns me on knowing that she wanted to do that but looking back it again seems obvious that she did it as part of her sexual awakening to give her more spontaneity.

I don't think I noticed or recognized that part of it back then .... or did I? I did clearly recognize even back then that I wanted her to experience new things with others; why else would I have encouraged her to let Peter be the first to try out her IUD? I have masturbated so many times to the thoughts that I'd used condoms up until we felt she was safe but that she gave that first time to Peter. Why the heck does that turn me on like it does?

In a way, I suppose it seems apparent where all of this is heading. I've said it all along that I do want her to push this a bit more although at this point I'm not sure that I want much more than where we are. But at the same time, if it happens of its own accord with her wanting these experiences, I also know I will probably never say no.

I’m not that sure that Ray is the guy to push her that far and that's why I think I find all of this very arousing right now, because it is clearly her that wants all of this stuff, this cuckold stuff!

Perhaps it might be the way and she would go further with a more dominant lover who knew his bounds and understood where the sharp-edges were but, again I want her to guide this and I want to be a part of this journey with her.


What a weekend. Awesome day yesterday ended with an awesome evening!

Suzanna and I lay out in the sun, swam in the pool and drank most of the afternoon. She was so playful without the kids being around including her flashing me her naked body in the pool and even up on our deck. The afternoon was beautiful and we both dozed on and off enjoying the first truly nice afternoon in a long time.

Rather than cooking dinner we had a pizza delivered. I joked with Suzanna that she should answer the door in a skimpy robe or something like that. She'd take off her bathing suit and I almost had her going for it at one point but she chickened out at the last moment.

We opened a bottle of red wine with the pizza and afterwards it was up to the bedroom as the wine and the heat of the day had gotten her worked up. When we were in the bedroom she was obviously horny as she stripped off her robe and lay back. In our inebriated state she teased me about, "better have me now or you'll have to wait". At one point she rolled over and picked up a pair of panties and teased me about, "maybe you'll put these back on me tonight" and then she teased that if I wasn't a good boy that they might go back on sooner than later!

I joked back that I wished she'd let me take a picture of her pussy ‘to help me through the week’. She giggled but then said, "Ok". I was stunned but didn't give her a second to change her mind. I picked up my work-phone and snapped a picture. She insisted on looking at the picture and smiled. I asked her if she was more at-ease with pictures of her being more hairy and she said, "Maybe; I feel less ******* this way".

I didn't push it and put the phone down and went back to business. As I licked away at her pussy I asked her, "how come you let Ray take pictures of you sometimes" and she said, "well, he doesn't always ask...." A second later she said, "Sometimes I don't even know he's taken any".

I said to her that he could have taken some that she may not be happy about him having and she giggled and said that he'd promised to make sure whatever he took didn't have her face in them. I asked her if she trusted him and she said, "yeah, but what difference does it really make?" and then she lifted her head up and looked down at me still between her legs and said, "you have pics of me with my face in them" and a second later she said, "and knowing you, you've probably posted them on the web somewhere". I didn't answer her, not really sure what I should/could have said.

As I'd said, she was quite horny yesterday from the day in general and as I licked away at her pussy she was happily moaning away. When I felt her float into her first orgasm I slid up her body and got ready to mount her! Her eyes were open and as I started to rub my cock around her pussy she smiled at me and handed me the Astroglide and said, "be sure I don't get too sore".

I never mind using lube with her once I'm done licking her pussy before we start fucking and once I'd applied a little, oh man, my cock slipped right into her pussy all the way. She let out what had to have been the sexiest moan ever as I pushed it home all the way into her. We kissed and hugged with my cock all the way into her and I then rose up on my elbows so she could look down and enjoy the sight of my cock pulling out of her. She looked up at me after watching me stroke it in and out a few times and with a half-moan she said, "almost like sloppy seconds" and it was.

she pulled her knees back for me and I was almost in my own world enjoying the feel of her body. Then I felt her body stiffen at least twice as I took out my pleasures on her. Feeling her orgasm under me really got me horny as each time her pussy would tighten up and then as the pleasure passed over her pussy would open up. It was almost like her hips would move back and arch up and I felt like I was in her up to her neck! Finally, oh my, at the end I don't even recall what she was saying as she rocked back and forth. I was buried deep in her pussy when I felt it begin. Even in my delirium I counted at least 4 or 5 what had to be huge squirts of cum and each one brought out a squeal from her which only spurred us both on.

We were both spent and I pulled off of her. She was going to roll over and get off the bed but I stopped her and said, "one second" and before she could move I snapped the second picture. I wished she hadn't rolled to one side, having her up on that pillow left her with her pussy gaping open which was just so hot to look at.

I could have taken another shot of her in the bathroom, one foot on the toilet, cleaning up, but that would have risked her getting annoyed and making me delete the previous 2 pics so I let it go.

I joined her a moment later and she rinsed out the washcloth and then cleaned up my cock and crotch as she'd done herself. She kneeled in front of me then gave me a quick suck and again, as if talking to my cock, she said, "now you'll just have to wait till later this week." She kissed the tip, stood up and kissed me and said it'd been an awesome weekend.

I washed my face and brushed my teeth and when I came back into the bedroom she was just pulling on her t-shirt and she turned to me and said, "do you want me to wait till tomorrow morning" as she held up a pair of panties. I told her that it was up to her but that I loved falling asleep with her spooning behind her. She said, "as long as you behave yourself" and then cupped my cock and said, "but if this is going to be poking me all night, then.....”

I held her and said, "Whatever you want, as long as you're next to me". She smiled and got into bed without panties on.


This morning though we are back to the normal routine. I heard her in the shower as I awoke and when the bedroom door opened she had the usual towel around her head but had already put panties on. She saw me staring and said, "sorry, but you can wait till Thursday" and broke out in a big smile.

I walked to the bathroom with a tent in my boxers!


Damn, another book filled.