Journal of a Journey - Book Thirteen

I finally did it and owned up to telling Suzanna that I wanted to experience more of what I've been fantasizing about. I guess I figured, “why fight it?” it's obviously what I want. I love knowing she's fucking Dan and I love her taunting and teasing me about it. If it's something I truly want to experience, it just seemed like the stars and moon and whatever lined up and the circumstances were such that I let it out.

I told Suzanna that I really got turned on by her flaunting her sexual relationship and desires with Dan. I think it took her a bit to realize what I was saying to her but she accepted it in a loving way and I truly believe she is still doing much of this as something to give me increased pleasure, clearly along with hers.

If last night was any sign of what's going to happen, I can honestly say, ”Bring it on” I want to do it. Some of what I shared with her was what she'd already known; some of what I shared, I think may have surprised her but didn't shock her. I told her that the 2 days of ‘denial’ she imposes on me before she sees Dan were in many ways some of the most erotic times I can ever remember and that despite it going on now for several years in one way or another, it hasn't gotten old, it's only gotten more exciting for me.

A lot of what we talked about was nothing new but I think hearing it again and re-hashing some old ground may have given her a new sense of understanding just how turned on I am about all of this. Despite her PMS mood last night, the sex was intense and passionate and incredibly satisfying (unless she was able to somehow fake her rapid heartbeat, being out-of-breath and the cool sheen of sweat that covered both of us!)

It actually felt good to me to not have to be so guarded in my responses.


Suzanna's not having the best of times. She’s even saying she may want to go get checked and see if she's into pre-menopause or whatever as she's not thrilled to say the least so that's left me to my own methods for fun for the past few days.

No word yet on what's up for next week but we're talking about doing some college-visits in the next few weeks as our son gets ready to narrow down his choices for this September when he'll be a freshman. We're talking about heading up to Vermont (he's been accepted at U-Vt) maybe next weekend and staying till Monday and maybe checking out schools in Western Mass (he's also been accepted at UMass-Amherst).

Not sure what she's planning or told Dan just yet; she's not in the sexiest of moods right now.


Dan had to go out of town suddenly as apparently he has a ****** situation. I didn't know but his ****** is actually from out in California where she says his parents still live. That's all she shared with me. The other wrinkle is that it's still that time of the month and again she's all up about having to go to the doctors so there's been nothing happening there either. So I'm having my own fun tonight!


We just got home. Suzanna was feeling sort of depressed with Dan going away and leaving her so suddenly so we decided to get away and went up to Boston to visit some good friends of ours. We figured it would be best for her mood and it did the trick. While we were away she did hear from Dan and now know it is his sister-in-law that is ill. That's all she shared with me but apparently his brother is quite upset and that is the reason for his sudden trip. From what Suzanna shared, his brother is the only immediate ****** he has as his parents passed away several years ago.

Her period did finally end on Thursday and we did have our fun that night. She teased me mercilessly for a while, at one point lying back against our headboard with her legs spread and knees bent showing me her pussy but telling me that I would just have to wait and that before I had her that she needed to have a bit of fun with a friend. She pulled out her favourite dildo (‘Jim’) and told me that I ‘should know better’ and that it is a special treat for me to have her on a Thursday but that I would just have to wait. So I knelt there at the foot of the bed and watched her plunge the dildo in and out of her till it glistened with her sweetness! It wasn't quite as exciting as watching Dan ‘do’ her but seeing her close her eyes and lose herself in pleasure was nonetheless quite exciting. My cock was throbbing as I watched her bring herself off several times.

At one point she looked at me and said that I, "might want to start jerking off" as she may not want me after all! Damn did that get me going but ultimately she seemed to exhaust herself and she finally slid down flat on the bed and said, "Okay, you can have your turn now". She handed me the lubricant she'd used with her dildo and said, "you should use some of this then I'll feel like I usually do on Fridays and I know you like that". Sure enough, she did feel incredible and as we got started she wrapped her legs around me and pulled me in deep when I was close. All she needed to do was whisper in my ear, "you can cum now" and that was it.


Well, we did have sex on Tuesday night and she did keep up with the teasing but what I am still horny and hard from is what she did last night!

Dan is back home so she's already eager to see him tomorrow night so last night she surprised me when she was all frisky with me when we were going to bed.

When she was changed into a teddy when I came up to the bedroom I started to ask her what was up as it was a Wednesday night and that's usually my night for my own fun. She crooked her finger and called me over to her and as I waited for an answer she undid my pants and started to get me hard.

"I'm horny. We can fuck if you want but I don’t want you to cum in me" she said so calmly and plainly. "What do you think?" and as she said that she unsnapped the crotch to her teddy and showed me her bare pussy.

My cock was hard already so what else could I do but croak out, "okay, if that's okay with you!”

I climbed up on her and she slid down and pulled her knees back for me and said, "Use some slippery stuff" as I watched her rub her button a bit. Damn, she looked so good so I spread on some lubricant and we got started.

She again teased me that, "you like how I feel all wet, don’t you?" All I could do was groan in response. She then asked, "What do you like better, slippery stuff or Dan's stuff in me?" and then she immediately said sternly "BUT DON’T CUM IN ME!".

Damn, that was scary as it really got me going but I managed to hold off and, damn, was she wet and open letting me really plunge into her.

I guess she knew I was getting close and she just said, "Pull it out and finish like you usually do tonight, I want to watch!”

I don’t think I've ever felt my cock feel so huge as it felt as I pulled out of her. Her pussy just hung open as I knelt back on my knees and jerked myself off in a blur. Literally, a split second later I just exploded and it spurted all the way up to her chin and all over the front of her teddy!

Even in that moment of ecstasy the cuck in me made sure not to spurt or drip into her now convulsing pussy (from, I guess, her watching me squirt). I squeezed the last drops from down low and let her watch me lick my fingers off. "There's more here" and she pointed to her chin, neck and the front of her teddy. I didn't even think twice and just leaned forward and started just above her pussy and licked her stomach clean and then worked my way up.

When I licked her neck and chin off she opened her mouth and we fell into an intense French-kiss and she moaned loudly when she tasted the cum on my tongue and in my mouth. I so wanted to push into her at that moment but she pulled her legs together and just said quietly as we hugged, "that's enough for tonight".

We hugged and kissed for a moment more until she pulled away from me and whispered, "was that okay for you?" All I could do was groan, "uh huh!!" and she giggled and said, "good".

We went to bed after that and didn't really talk much more about it but even today I'm still all excited about what she did! My god, I know I didn't get to blow inside her but I swear that was one intense cum for sure!


Finally home after spending the afternoon with the ******; fortunately, the beautiful weather made the day enjoyable as we could be outside instead of being cooped up inside. Suzanna was excited about going to meet with Dan at his place but we didn’t say much with the kids being around.

Suzanna came home in a somewhat sombre mood having heard from Dan again. She shared with me what the ****** emergency was about, it turns out Dan's sister-in-law, the brother’s wife, was in a bad car accident and they're not sure if she's going to make it yet. I didn't get all the details but she was alone in the car and it took a long time to find where the accident had happened in the rain. Apparently she's still in a coma or something like that but they don’t really know much more or that's all she told me. She said Dan's very upset about it and his brother is even more so. He may be going back out next week again if things haven't gotten better.

I asked, silly question, whether they'd had sex. I wasn't sure and she just said ‘of course’ and ‘he said it was the best part of the past week’. I honestly felt good for him, that Suzanna could give him some of the pleasure she's so capable of giving; the way she said it too let me know she was also upset by how Dan was feeling.

As we got into bed she was quiet, not really into the teasing stuff, so I didn't push it. As we got started she told me that he was very gentle with her but VERY passionate and that she really ‘felt’ all of him. I was already in her and she told me how much he seemed to really need it the ‘first time he came in me’. She told me how he seemed to need to be deep in her and how she liked feeling that from him (I guess at times he can be maybe too physical?) but then she said that the, "second time, he wasn't quite so gentle..." and proceeded to tell me how she knelt at the edge of his bed and let him ‘use me’ to get his frustrations out.

Damn, did that turn me on to think about? Even made me wonder if she'd just said it or whether they'd really done it! Just to hear her say it was incredible, we've done that position many times and I love it when she'll reach back and even help and grab her butt and pull herself open for me. Thinking of her doing that for Dan was intense; I know she must be very into it with him to let him have her that way.

I was on top as she was tired and she even told me that I should hold her legs back if I wanted them there because she was ‘too worn out’ and that just turned me on. She didn't say much more but my mind was already in motion from earlier and feeling her let me have her so deep like that just sent me over the edge and, damn, if I didn't add my sticky stuff to her. She giggled as I let loose and I could feel her tense up with her own smaller orgasm. I could feel our hearts beating fast afterwards as I lay down onto her and she just whispered that she loved me.

Moments like that are what it's all about for us, enjoying that moment together


It’s been a wickedly busy week between work, our son's college admission adventures, our accountant needing more info for our taxes and a visit to a college earlier today, there's just not been much time. Suzanna was even tired enough after work to think about calling off seeing Dan last night but she went although she came home just after 11pm.

Work has been the killer for me as I've been up on conference calls at all sorts of ungodly hours even to the point where I didn't even notice that it was Wednesday night as my brain, for a change, wasn't on sex. The warm weather on top of it all didn't make for the best sleeping as both Suzanna and I like it cool at night and we weren't ready to turn on the air con just yet.

Despite her tiredness though, last night we did have our time together (it was already Saturday in Japan where my conference calls have involved). With the night off for a change I was very horny waiting for her and was going to write a diary update here when she texted me that she was on her way home.

"If you want me you have to do all the work" was the first thing she said to me when we closed the bedroom door. With that she lay on the bed and willingly (helping too!!) let me undress her. I think I'll always love the feeling of knowing she was naked with him not an hour earlier. Her skin felt warm all over and she had the most content relaxed look to her. I slid her skirt off over her hips and just looked at her lying there in just her bra and panties. She had to lift up for me to undo her bra and her pointy nipples were waiting for my mouth but what I loved most was thinking about what was under her damp panties.

We don’t always get to this but last night we did as she even encouraged me to go down on her for as long as I wanted. It's that moment that I finally feel comfortable sharing with her that again confirms that I’m a cuck; tasting and knowing that Dan was in her; feeling how wet she was and knowing it's his cum, even now the next day it gets me horny thinking aboutit. I thought she'd just lay back for a bit but she started to tease me a bit and that got me really going. She teased me that I liked knowing he'd fucked her earlier and about how wet she felt. After just a few minutes, despite that I had wanted to go for longer, I just had to move up and slip into her.

She seemed eager to pull her knees back for me and as I filled her she hugged me and it was one of those moments where neither of us needed to say a word, just how we felt against and inside each other was all that was needed. It wasn't a moment for teasing as I felt her melt against me and totally open up for me. For as wet as she was when we started, there were now squishing sounds every time we moved together and I could feel her body as she too started moving more and more urgently against me. Each time I'd plunge into her she'd be eagerly pushing up against me. It was incredible for as long as we lasted which wasn't too long.

After cleaning up a bit, we both fell asleep quickly. Unfortunately, this morning she woke up still feeling tired and complaining of feeling a bit of a scratchy throat. I’m thinking it’s that time of year when we start suffering from allergies from pollen and such so maybe it's just that but, whatever reason, she went to bed early tonight so that's all there is to write about.


She went off to work all stuffed up but feeling better after sleeping the day away yesterday.

It's not like I dislike, or worse, hate Dan at all for I know he makes Suzanna happy and if she's (and by inference, me) making him feel better, then I'm okay with it. As for her attention bringing them closer together, I suppose it could but it's not like she's seeing him any more than usual so I'm not sure. I guess Suzanna's maybe said he's more passionate or something like that if I think about it but I can't be sure.

I know she exchanged Email with Dan yesterday and last night she told me that his sister-in-law isn't responding and that they're not sure what they can/should do. They're from California and they're all into the ‘no artificial means’ to keep someone alive. She said that although that idea sounds and looks good on paper until it happens in real-life. So now I know that's on her mind too.

It's destined to be a long week as she also reminded that she's already starting to get achy and that it's that time of the month again soon.


Tuesday night and it’s just me and my right hand. I'd hoped that maybe we'd have some time but it didn't work out. This time she says she's more tired than last month and she went to bed early so I had some fun on my own.

Early on we did have some arguments about things. When she was with Peter there were times when we'd argue about things for I was very uncomfortable with sometimes just how close they were getting and it did lead to heated discussions. I expect that she and Dan have their rough spots too but I think their expectations are different. From what I can see he KNOWS he has a good thing with Suzanna (what divorced guy wouldn't like a girlfriend who would fuck-regularly and not ask for more?!) but just as I tend to only write about the positive or exciting stuff I think it's the same with Suzanna, she shares with me but only good stuff (although she did tell me when he wanted things she wasn't ready for).

We did tell each other that ‘things happen’ when you travel on business. She knows it from her time before me for both of us. I know that on many occasions, under whatever circumstances, both women and men will do things or let things happen that they wouldn't normally do. Whether it's as mild as going to a nudie-bar and maybe getting to feel some bare breasts or whether it's as wild as picking up (or getting picked up) in a bar and going for a one-night-stand. The point we clicked on was that both of those are very different than a pre-meditated, planned affair where you clandestinely meet and, at the same time, take that time away from the other person. Neither of us could condone the latter; it's cheating.

Both of us understood that and for both of us things sometimes happen if you're hours away from home; that you're not doing it to intentionally hurt the other person. Just don’t let it get out of hand. Granted, we both ‘came of age’ in the 70's when it was nothing to fuck on a first-date so that may have affected us a bit!

Neither of us has ever attached much morality to sex; to marriage and love for each other, yes, but not to sex itself.

My sentiments regarding me sucking Dan's cock haven't changed. It's not something I would want to do nor would I think either Suzanna or Dan would want it. My previous thoughts and reference to it was at that moment (a scene I will never forget) to see him behind her and then pull out still hard and with cum still dripping. Even now I still get hard thinking of what he'd left in her and even now in my mind that is like the only moment when I ever had the thought to want to suck him. More to feel and share the moment with Suzanna than anything else though.

I did find that Email that Suzanna had sent me long ago when she was with Peter. I have to re-read it to see if I am maybe more comfortable posting it now than I was back then. Other than that, Suzanna is not one to sit on the computer posting stuff like this. It's not her; talk on the phone, yes, but she's not into email or blogs or twitter or Facebook so I don’t think anyone will ever see her online unless it's something I posted.

Our kids are older (18 and 15) and they know that we go out on Friday nights and that either Mom goes out with her friends or that Mom and *** go out together. I am sure that our son may wonder but since we are happy together and as a ******, I am hoping they don’t give it too much thought. Besides, more often than not they usually find places to go on Fridays (and we have their friends here on other nights). I'm sure later in life one of them will ask ‘what was up with you guys on Friday nights’ but they also know we are private about our own stuff and that we don’t tell them everything. They respect the distance we give them and they seem to give it back to us in return.


I suspect my son is aware of what's going on. I think when he and his girlfriend started having sex themselves that he may have realized (or at least consciously became aware of it) that his mom has her fun. I've suspected that the reason he doesn't say anything is that we give him his space for his own relationship. It's actually our ******** that I'm concerned about and Suzanna is too, that she not get the wrong idea before she's old enough to understand all the consequences of her actions.


Suzanna was first on Email and then on the phone with Dan and she said he's planning on going back out to California later this week and she hinted with me that she may find a way to go see him before Friday. She had this look of concern about her and said that they ‘were going to make some decisions’ about the sister-in-law and that Dan wanted to be there. Without any thought really, I told her to do what she needed to and she smiled and hugged me and said, "thanks, you're the best" and she went back to the computer I'm assuming to Email him. She's off to do some shopping now and the lawn is still calling me.


I am sure that she'll want to see Dan if he isn't going to be around later this week. I Don’t think there's any doubt that she wants her time with him. I can see that when he's away that there's, shall we say, "less spring in her step...”

I'll see if I can ask her as if ‘what if....’ I do not think she'd want to go away ‘on vacation’ with him, I don’t get the feeling that she'd want that (maybe she's cautious about her own feelings). I suspect that her own emotional state as relates to Dan might push her a bit but I don’t think she'd want to go. As I said, I'll see if I can work it into our conversation or, hopefully, foreplay later tonight.

Regarding my son; about the only outgoing reason for my saying anything is that he's stopped asking about our plans for Friday nights. He may have put things together, first Thursdays and now Fridays, and I'm hoping he has the right understanding of the situation. He surely knows that Suzanna and I have sex as there have been several close calls (knocking on our door while she's moaning away under me; finding her underwear in weird places; no longer asking what Astroglide is, etc.). He long ago found both Penthouse and Penthouse Letters magazines so he knows we are somewhat open sexually. I don’t think it'd freak him out if he knew his mom fucked other guys but he probably lacks the maturity to put it into proper context. At his age, sex is in a different place to him than it is for us.


Last night was interesting. She was definitely horny but she seized the opportunity to do some teasing. She lay there in bed with just her panties on and started saying stuff like, "maybe you should wait a little while longer' and then she said, "maybe you should wait till after I see Dan ..." and then, " ... or he'll be upset".

She KNEW what she was doing, the more she talked the hotter I got and the bigger the bulge in my boxers grew.

She came over to me, pulled down my boxers and started to stroke me, "Look at how big 'he' is just from what I said to you!” I swear I was dripping pre-cum all over and the wet spot in her panties was now visible.

"Maybe I'll just give you a blowjob instead and I'll wait for Dan". Damn, I nearly started to cum when she said that and gently licked at the swollen tip of my cock.

"What do you think we should do?" she asked me.

I nearly said something I knew I'd regret, I nearly admitted that maybe she SHOULD wait but instead I just said, "I really need to be in you". She smiled at that response and as she kept sucking at me she slid her own panties off and lay back.

I watched her as she spread herself apart and ran her fingers up, she was so wet already. She looked up at me with my stiff cock bobbing away and she said, "maybe you should use some lubricant, you like it when I'm really wet, don’t you?”

I swear if she kept going that I was going to lose it. She handed me the Astroglide and I did put some on and I ran the tip of my cock between her silky smooth labia; she was so hot!

In a low sexy voice she just said, "come on, it's your turn now" and as I slid into her she whispered, "ohhh, I am so wet, Dan left such a mess in me!!!".

I know she said other stuff as we really got into it but I was too far gone to remember them other than feeling her pussy grabbing at me as I pull back and then as I pushed in.

She pulled her knees back and we found our rhythm and, damn, she started to let loose and began a long intense orgasm. I joined her at the end and tried as long as I could to hold back until I couldn't any longer and then I let loose myself deep in her. I know she felt it as I heard and felt her moan as I started to cum in her.

Afterwards we lay on the bed together and she rolled to me and said she was serious when she'd said she may try to find time to see Dan earlier this week. I told her that was fine with me and then I joked with her that, "maybe I shouldn't have cum in you?"

She just said, "Don’t worry. I'll douche and what he doesn't know won't hurt him!” I had to chuckle at that reply!

I almost asked her if she would go with Dan to California if he asked her to but I did not: it just didn't fit in the moment.


I'm quite titillated tonight as Suzanna told me earlier that she's going to see Dan tomorrow after work. She's actually going to leave work early and drive down to where Dan is staying in a hotel about an hour and a half south of us, almost a 2 hour drive for her.

Needless to say, no nookie tonight but I may find some time to have a bit of fun later.


She went into work early today so she can leave early. I don’t think its love, more horniness and not wanting to miss yet another week with him.


I’m coming to think that she's getting more of an emotional attachment to Dan. Whether it's love like it was with Peter or whether its lust/infatuation, it's okay for now. I know it's playing with fire letting her grow this close to him but, as I said, the time we have together really leaves me in no doubt about our own relationship.

I know maybe I should be worried in a way but there is something that is just incredibly arousing to me seeing her pack her little bag this morning to take with her and knowing she's going off to see her lover.

Even when she's not seeing him there are times when I'll just look at her and a rush of horniness will overtake me when I think of them fucking. I had thought that maybe that feeling would subside over time but to this day seeing her, even just working around the house or whatever, and knowing she's fucking another guy and carrying his cum in her afterwards is still such a turn-on.


She called about 11 and said she was on her way and that I should, "wait up for her". I laughed and said, "as if you have a choice".

She should be home in maybe 30-45 minutes. It's raining again so I hope she's taking it slow.

I guess I’m thinking that Suzanna is either getting very emotionally involved with Dan or that she's fallen in love with him. I know either or both are a possibility and, at least right now, it doesn't worry me if it's true. I'd even say that if it is something that gives Suzanna the desire and courage to want more with him then, again, at this point in time, I want to let it happen. As I've written before, and I know it sounds crazy, I do want to see her want him. I want to see her let herself go with him as she did with Peter.

It's like the same feeling when you taught your kids to ride a bike. You stand back beaming about them, feeling proud for them and feeling good vicariously because they have that smile on their face that they've done something that they feel good about. I get the same feeling when Suzanna lets herself go with Dan and I can share in it with her, even if it's an hour or two later, feeling her warm body next to mine.

Damn, I'm about ready to burst now waiting for her!


She got home just before 12:30am this morning. I pondered about the reality that she'd driven almost 4 hours to see him. I didn't ask her about that specifically but I did ask her as we were getting up to the bedroom what was the urgency in seeing him.

She said that he's heading back to California on Friday and that she didn't want to ‘not see’ him this week. I looked at her and she just said, "I wanted him; I missed him, what can I say? I like the sex with him ....". I smiled and she giggled, " .... but now it's your turn"

By the time I got the bedroom door closed she was already undressing. I love looking at her and to see as she stepped out of her panties the obvious signs that she'd been busy. Her whole pussy mound was reddened and swollen and the smell of sex was everywhere. As we lay together on the bed she said that she hadn't ‘cleaned up’ much as she wanted to get on her way home. I told her that was fine, that I ‘like her dirty’. She giggled at that and told me that Dan had certainly gotten her very dirty.

My fingers found her waiting pussy and she was VERY wet. I mean VERY wet enough that I joked with her, "what did he wait for you?" She giggled again and said, "I Don’t think he's doing it with anyone else but me ..." and then she giggled and said "...unlike me!”

It wasn't all creamy but it was very wet, enough that I didn't even need any lubricant to slip right into her. She giggled and squealed a bit as I pushed into her saying she was ‘tired’ and at another point she said that Dan ‘had given her quite a workout’.

I know she orgasmed at least once or twice as we enjoyed ourselves. They weren't huge as I suspected (and she confirmed) that she was pretty tired but there was no faking either and I followed shortly afterwards with what I felt was a larger-than-usual load at which she moaned.

I'll admit it was pretty quick maybe 15-20 minutes total start to finish but although it was late and we're lying there I just said, "do you want to talk about Dan or what's going on?”

She said she was tired but that she'd tell me what she knew. Apparently he's going back out because his sister-in-law hasn't made any progress. She's still on life-support connected to a bunch of machines (she started to describe what Dan said she looked like but I stopped her as I don’t really want to know how gory she looks) and that there's been no sign of any change and they weren't sure if there would be. I asked if they were saying she's brain-dead and she said that they're not saying that as people have recovered from this sort of comatose/vegetative state but that it's rare. Anyway, he's going out there to see where they can move her to and to see how he can help out.

I took that moment to ask her, “how do you feel about this?" and she honestly said to me that she feels like she takes Dan ‘away’ from all of it when she's there and that she feels really good being able to do that. She said he seems so tense and anxious when she first gets there, "but after some lovin', he's much better".

I asked her if there was anything more. She paused for a second and then just said, "I care about him a lot and it hurts me to see him this way".

I didn't ask if she loved him, she would have said that and certainly she had no bones about saying it about Peter in the past, so I just left it at that. She got up and went into the bathroom to clean up a bit and I followed her. She giggled at me as I stood behind her waiting for her to be done with the washcloth. I frowned when she put her panties back on before getting back in bed but she just said, "I don’t want to make a mess by morning." That made me laugh out loud which brought about a playful slap from her!

This morning and how can you be in a sour mood after some good sex last night? Despite the rush of last night there is just a connection I feel between us when we're together having sex when she gets home. It's more like a passion that I feel from her and I know she feels from me. As long as I feel that with her, I don’t think I'll be worried about anything just yet.

Last night as expected, Suzanna was still very horny. Sometimes it even surprises me at how ‘well this works’, that she's horny for days after being with Dan.

She did do a lot of teasing including playfully fending off my advances to remove her panties, for quite a while driving me crazy! When I did finally remove them she TOLD me to go down on her to get her ready and be sure she was wet!

As I went down on her she said a few things to encourage me, one of them that I recall was, "mmm, just like Dan does". Now that was a real turn-on. I know they fuck but hearing her say that I'm eating/licking her the same as Dan does seemed to ‘touch’ me. Thinking about his face between her legs and his tongue probing her sweetness, damn, if I wasn't already horny, that would have done it!

She did orgasm (and rather easily at that) while I was licking away and it equally turned me on to think that Dan has also done that to her, feeling her pussy clenching down on my tongue and tasting and feeling how wet she became and knowing Dan's tasted her too seemed to really REALLY rev me up.

I was wicked hard and after she'd cum I started to move up to push into her but she sat up and reached down and took my cock in her hand and said, "not so fast". I started to freak out and she continued, "It's Thursday and you don’t normally get to have me, it's Dan's night usually".

I swear she had to feel my cock throbbing as she gently stroked me. She continued, "maybe you can get in me but maybe you shouldn't cum in me?" and she looked up at me and said, "what do you think? Maybe you should pull out and just cum on me.”

I swear I was frantic and I started to say, "if that's what you really want...."

She giggled and said, "okay, put it in but let me know when you're close and I'll decide then.”

I think my hands were shaking as I guided it into her. She was so open and wet from just orgasming that she felt great. "You'd better be careful ..." and then she said it and it drove me wild, " .... you know Dan doesn't like you to cum in me!!!”

She had to feel it, my cock felt like it grew like 10-sizes. I swear just hearing her say that made me want her so much. I slammed into her as hard and deep as I could and she squealed away with me.

A moment later I was getting close. I struggled to hold off and said to her ,"I'm close, is that really what you want?".

She seemed to take a moment to respond (I guess feeling how I felt in her and I don’t know how I held off) until she said quietly "well, I won't see him for a few days so I suppose it's okay.". With that I sank into her one last time and I just started to spew in her. It was an exhausting orgasm for me, one that I felt from my toes to my scalp and left me lying against her afterwards catching my breath. All I remember next is her hugging me with both her arms and legs pulling me close and hearing her almost whisper in my ear over our passion was, "I love you".

This morning, how happy and content she seemed.


In my favour tonight there was no expectation of sex as Dan has returned. He called her on Sunday afternoon when he got home. She was all happy after that and I was surprised that she didn't want to find a way to go there but she didn't.

With today being Wednesday she made it a point this morning to show me she would be wearing panties till Friday. Tonight I suggested that maybe I would join them. She smiled and said, "That would be nice but let me make sure Dan is okay with it".

I guess, I mean if he's all weepy or something about his sister-in-law, maybe I don’t want to be there.

With my being busy the past few nights (since Sunday night as it's already Monday by then in the Far-East) there's not much to report. Last night I took an hour or so break from a conference-call and we had a glass of wine together. She teased me that, "I'd better have her or I'll be waiting..." repeatedly and each time I know she could feel me getting hornier and hornier. I was just about ready for her when she pushed me back and said she wasn't ready yet and then she said, "Jim isn't done with me yet". (Jim is what we named her favourite gel dildo.) As she lubed it up and then pushed it in she said, "you like seconds better anyway".

I love watching her orgasm. There is something so beautiful about it. Seeing her close her eyes and her head roll back gently. The nipples give it away for Suzanna. When she's cumming hard they darken and turn into stiff pebbles. The other thing that gives it away is the way the dildo stays put even when she takes her hands off it, if anything she somehow pulls it in even deeper!

Women are like men, when they want to get off quickly they can. Last night was no exception, her fun was a shortcut past foreplay. When she finally pulled the dildo out she looked at me with those half-closed eyes and just said, "mmmm, your turn to make a mess". I can't remember what she said after that but I know she kept it up and it drove me crazy, so crazy I lasted maybe 5 minutes at most before it was finally my turn.

I rolled off of her and she started to giggle at, "how fast that was" as it had taken not even 15 minutes from start to finish and then she said, "I'll just have more with Dan, he lasts a lot longer".

I don’t know if she even realized she'd said it but I heard it and my first response (again confirming I really am a cuckold) was to say, "That’s nice".

I know it’s not much really but it was my first response and I'm okay with it.


I'm on pins-and-needles about tonight as last night Suzanna said that I could ‘definitely’ come along tonight. She said that Dan had even sounded okay about it and that she thought it would be nice if I would also help commiserate with him ‘guy-to-guy’. I asked her whether I'd be watching or participating. She said with a smile on her face, "let's see how it goes, you know how Dan is about that".

Going to bed last night she teased me about getting to see under her panties again tonight when she takes them off for Dan! Damn, I lay there for what seemed like ages with a raging hard-on. I wanted to give it a quick jerk but I resisted and know that tonight I'll want her even more.

She asked me to meet them at the club they go to about 7pm as she wanted some time with him before I got there. I told her okay and that I'd get a bite to eat beforehand.

The other thing I wanted to write about was the whole thing about more than one guy. I really wouldn't have believed that Suzanna would ever become the sexual dynamo she seems to now be. Indeed it seems that we have found the on switch and I’m thinking this is one of the formative events in my wanting to be a cuckold.

A freshman frat pledge party in college had a hooker for one of the parties and as this was the 70's condoms weren't even given a thought. This semi-attractive dirty blonde woman, maybe in her early 30's, took on at least 15-20 freshmen who wanted to join the Frat. I wasn't one of them but did watch as several guys took their turns (many others watched and cheered them on). She was amazing to me at the time just calmly lying there and seeming to enjoy all these 18 year old guys fucking her over and over. It was obvious to anyone there that she was definitely enjoying herself.

I was barely 18 at the time and it was the first time I'd seen anything like this (I'd barely seen porn at that time) and I think it became something that I may have always wanted to experience in one way or another.

There was another defining moment in my youth when I am sitting in the back of this conference room listening to people on a conference call.

There is this blonde vendor rep sitting across from me with a short-skirt on and I swear she has thigh-highs on and I can see the tops of them. I don’t know if she knows I'm looking (there's no ‘modesty panel’ under the table she's and as she turns to talk to people I can now see her white panties! Damn, my cock was throbbing.

I wasn't the only one to notice the show going on. Just before the meeting ended she turned around in her chair and with her legs spread apart we got quite the camel-toe view (from the outline in her panties, she's definitely bare down there). When she went to stand up at the end of the meeting she smoothed everything down and I swore she gave a look around, maybe she knowing she was on display!

Needless to say that kept me horned up all afternoon.


Suzanna showed me a bit more of what she said she'd do for me to give me more of the experience I (and she) want.

I did meet them last night. I got to the bar they hang out in by about 7:15pm and they were both already there with drinks in hand. Suzanna came right over to me and hugged and kissed me. As she broke the kiss she said I should follow her into the back alcove by where the bathrooms are. I don’t think anyone took notice.

Once in the small hallway out of sight she said to me, "I hope this is what you wanted". I was confused until she took my hand in hers, pulled up the front of her skirt and put my hand down inside her panties. "Dan and I already had sex and I thought you might want to feel how wet I am from him".

I could feel how swollen her pussy lips were and I could feel wetness between them. She spread her legs apart a bit for me as I ran one finger down to the bottom of her pussy and I could feel she was very wet and still very open and I could feel her panties were quite wet. She pulled my hand out and she took a sniff of my fingers and said, "You can think about that while we have some drinks." With that she gave me a kiss, put her skirt back into place and walked away.

I stood there stunned for a second and as I fidgeted with my own cock I brought my fingers to my own nose and could smell it, no doubt, it was cum. Damn, she'd done it ,she was really starting to flaunt it in front of me.

I pushed into the bathroom and washed my hands off thinking that if I smelled it that others would too and, for as much as I think I want to embrace the cuckold experience, that may be more than I think I'm ready for.

This took all of maybe a minute and it wasn't until I was washing my hand in the bathroom that I really started to think about it and, damn, my cock became this huge lump in my pants as I realized that not only had they already fucked but that Suzanna was literally hanging around with Dan and his friends at the bar while her pussy was full of and leaking his cum into her panties! It took me longer to get my cock back in place so I could go out into the bar than writing all of this had taken.

I did finally get myself together and go back out and sit at the bar. From the distance Suzanna waved and winked at me. As she did so Dan also looked over and smiled and waved.

That was just the start of the night!

I don’t know if they were giggling or not but I was surprised by her behaviour, that's for sure.

There wasn’t much outward behaviour at the bar. They did hold hands for a bit and even shot some pool together, but every 15 or 20 minutes or so she'd come over to me and eventually I went over to their table. The first thing Dan said to me was, "thank you" and something about, "...Suzanna being really wonderful...” I told him I had heard about his sister-in-law and I asked how his brother was holding up.

We made some idle talk for a while, talked about the hot day that today was forecast to be. All the while Suzanna was sitting on this high bar-stool and all I could think about every time I looked at her was that she was all wet from their fun earlier!

Dan never came out and said, "thanks for letting me fuck her" but the way he talked at times, it was obvious what he was saying. He told me several times how Suzanna had really gotten him out of feeling so down. The implication was obvious but when Suzanna would add in that she, "loved making him feel all better" and she'd rub his face or his shoulder, I think I began to wonder if maybe this was a bit too far for me as I wasn't sure how I felt. I was very turned on but I also wasn't really ready for what I was feeling.


I guess something must have showed on my face or in my actions as not long after that, Suzanna came over and sat with me for a bit without Dan and she tipped my head up with her finger under my chin and she just said, "I love you" and, "are you okay with this? I'm having fun."

I said something back about, "hoping we get going soon" and she smiled at that. I didn't know how or if I should say that things were bordering on too much but it seemed like I didn't have to. Maybe I telegraphed it to her from how I said whatever I did but she seemed to let up on me and even began to spend a bit more time with me at one point sitting against me on my lap while waiting her turn to take a shot at pool.

I think it seemed more intense to me yesterday than it may now another day later but I may have found some of where my limits are in terms of what I do and don’t want her to do. We haven't talked about that yet but, like I said, for the next hour or so at the bar things were calmer and looking back I'm not even sure if anyone else heard or knew what was being implied by some of the conversation so maybe it's just cuckold paranoia.

What I do know is that after we left the bar that she did start in again, primarily just with me and only when she was speaking to me and not really when Dan was around. There were little things as we walked back to his place she turned to me and said, "you want to watch don’t you?” and stuff like that.

When we got back to Dan's place he went off to find some beers and Suzanna took me aside and said that she'd talked about things with Dan and what he was and wasn't comfortable with. At that point she said very plainly and matter-of-factly something to the effect that I could watch them and when they were done, as long as it wasn't in Dan's room, that I could have her too. That surprised me and before I could answer her Dan was saying something about the drinks and Suzanna just said to me that she was going, "to be with her date". I felt weird following her right then so I told her I'd be along in a minute and used the bathroom.

It's weird because I can see some things clearly now looking back that I didn't think about then. Thinking about it I knew what I'd find when I went out to see them and thinking about it now, it is what I wanted to see, to see if she was still like that with him.

When I went around the corner into his den I saw I was right. She had already taken her clothes off and was sitting naked next to him, sort of lying on him on the couch. He was wearing just his shorts and I stood there for a minute looking at them and how comfortable she looked.

Neither of them even moved when I went into the room, at least they didn't move much. Suzanna did move around and I remember being disappointed she'd put her legs together a bit. I sat down on the love-seat opposite the couch where they were sitting. Dan's hand slowly moved around to caressing Suzanna's tits as he flipped the channels until he came across a soft-porn movie on one of the cable channels.

I started to stare at the TV and by the time I turned back to them, they were embraced in a kiss. It was apparent neither of them cared that I was sitting there. Suzanna turned so her body faced him and it was like watching a second soft-porn movie unfolding in front of me. I could tell from her breathing and how she was moving that Dan was getting her turned on. She even spread her legs for him but from behind all I could see was her butt and occasionally his fingers between her legs but I couldn't see any details.

I thought of fishing my cock out and masturbating a bit while I watched them but instead I just drank my beer and watched them without being obvious that I was staring at them despite it being difficult to watch my wife not 10 feet from me starting to moan and move against him.

They moved around a little until Suzanna was on her knees in front of him and tugging his shorts and underwear down. She seemed so comfortable with his cock, like it was a natural thing for her to be sucking him. On her knees I could now see between her spread legs and wasn't surprised to see her fingers there.

It was all happening pretty quickly as we'd only been at his place maybe 15-20 minutes at most! I think it really began to hit me at just how together they seemed sexually. It wasn't awkward or tentative at all seeing his fingers join hers between her legs and then seeing her hand take his and guide his fingers into her pussy. Seeing him probe in and out of her pussy right in front of me was really intense. Yes, I know they do this all the time and I've seen it before but this seemed different. Seeing her arch her back and move her knees apart so he could go deeper into her, seeing how wet they were when he pulled them back out.

At that moment I remembered that all that wetness was his cum from earlier and that did it, I knew I would have to have her somehow before we came home; that I wouldn't last if I had to wait.


I need to get my head back into Friday night as things seem more blurred the more time goes by.

I was just sitting back watching the 2 of them getting started and I can say again now looking back that it's much more the minor stuff that really gets to me. Yes, seeing her sucking on him was arousing but really it was the fingers between her legs and in her pussy that seemed to get to me much more. How she guided his hand and fingers to what she wanted him to do.

I remember Dan saying something quietly that I think was suggesting they go upstairs. Suzanna pulled her mouth off his cock and kissed him and stood up. As Dan went upstairs she came to me and told me that I could come upstairs and watch. She also said that she'd told Dan that she was going to tease me a bit more than she had in the past and said something about Dan ,"seeing how it goes". He'd walked away as we talked for a moment and then she said, "maybe you could wait a few minutes before coming up?”

With that she turned and, stark naked, walked away from me following her equally naked lover up to his room.

I just stood there looking at their clothes spread out on the couch and thinking to myself how happy she looked going off with him. In some ways it seemed totally surreal, like it was all a part of a story-book or something like that but then I heard noises upstairs and my curiosity got the better of me. It wasn't until I was in his doorway that I even thought about that I was still dressed.

They were quite involved already both lying on his bed; she on her back; him lying across her kissing her and sucking gently at her tits while one hand was busy between her spread legs.

I stood there for a minute before she broke the kiss and looked up at me and said, "you can come in". I felt kind of foolish for lurking in the doorway but I recall she went back to kissing him and he continued to work her up into a frenzy. I started to get undressed but left my underwear on as I felt weird getting naked while just standing there and I guess I didn't want to push things. It seemed obvious that Suzanna wanted to be with Dan as she hadn't encouraged me to come over to her or anything like that.

I stood and watched Dan move around and they got in pretty much a 69 position. Again Suzanna just nonchalantly started to suck his cock. From my angle he looked big and Suzanna could only get a bit of him into her mouth but my attention was mainly drawn to Dan alternating using his fingers and tongue between Suzanna's spread legs. There is something that just gets me turned on seeing her sharing her body so freely like that. Seeing Dan's fingers and tongue probing her like that is one of those things that really hits me. When I let myself remember that he'd already fucked her earlier, that really got me horny.

The next thing was hearing Suzanna's voice. She'd moved up on her elbows and was looking both me and Dan; that was when she said to me, "you can come in closer and look ... " and I will never forget her saying next, "... you know you want to". Damn, did that get me excited. I remember dropping down to my knees next to the bed but being quiet as Dan was still having his fun with her. I know he heard her and even now I'm still wondering what he must have thought.

I don’t recall specifically what happened next but they both moved around a few moments later (I guess) and she was sucking him one more time, I figured to get him hard, then she lay back on the bed and seemed to invite him to climb on top of her. I recall he smiled at me as he moved between her legs and started to play with her.

I have a clear memory from this point forward. Suzanna got up on her elbows and looked back and forth from me still kneeling at the side of the bed to Dan between her legs where he was rubbing the tip of his hard cock up and down between her fat pussy lips! As he dug the tip in further she looked at me and I thought I'd cum right then when she actually said out loud, "why don’t you move closer; I'm sure you want to watch this". Dan followed and I'll never forget hearing him say, "Watch me fuck her again". Just the way he said it, it wasn't condescending or humiliating or anything like that, he said it just as nonchalantly as Suzanna had.

I felt all nervous again, like it was the first time being with them which, in a way it was; they'd both now invited me to move closer. I'd always watched from a little distance, maybe 4-8 feet away, but they both invited me to get up closer and slowly I did. Thankfully neither of them really looked at me much after that as they were both too involved to even think about me. Suzanna accommodated his position by lazily spreading and pulling her legs back for him.

Now I've seen her have sex many times but this was probably the first time that I was so close. I mean I could have easily reached out and touched either of them. I was off to one side slightly at the foot of his bed leaning onto the bed with my knees on the floor; she was at most 2 feet from me and if I leaned in a bit more, I was even closer.

What a sight, I'd never really been that close to her before then. Seeing his big cock in her was very exciting! Even more exciting was seeing him pull it back out a little and seeing it wet from her. I tried to be very quiet and to resist whipping out my cock and madly jerking off. If that wasn't arousing enough, I watched him pull all the way out of her and apply some lubricant to his cock. All the while she lay there under him with her pussy gaping open, waiting for him to fill her again. With the lubricant he slid effortlessly back into her and, I swear, all 3 of us let out a moan!

I don’t know if it was my being there that subconsciously was spurring them on but she arched her back and he put his arms out and held back her knees such that from where I was sitting all I could see was his cock plunging in and out of her. Each time he'd pull it out she'd remain in her position with her pussy still wide open waiting for him to push back into her.

Now I know that when she's with Dan (or Peter) that she really gives all of herself to him but this was incredible for me to see and it really drove home how comfortable she is with him to let him take her higher and higher. I KNOW at that moment there was nothing on her mind other than having his fat cock fill her again over and over and I know that for him the only thing he wanted was to drive his cock back into her. What an intense moment to be a part of!

I had a huge wet-spot in my shorts from my cock dribbling away. All I could think about was how Suzanna's vagina was eagerly taking all of his cock over and over. I don’t even think at that moment my mind saw bodies or people attached, all I could see and focus on was a cock driving into a pussy.

I heard her moan and squeal several times as he really got her going. She was rolling her hips in time with his motion trying, I guess, to pull him deeper. He ground himself against her and from the angle I was at, I could see just how open she was and as I was watching it was obvious that she was having building up to one intense orgasm.

At that moment things seemed like they were moving in slow motion. I held my breath and watched as he unhurriedly pushed into her a few more times and her moans got louder and louder each time until at one point he pushed into her and she locked her legs around him and held him tightly and let out this scream into the side of his neck as she held him tightly and thrashed her head back and forth.

Call me a cuckold; at that moment I felt proud to be one!! I truly felt like I was on the top of the world with how she let loose with an orgasm under him. I moved to the centre of the foot of his bed and leaned forward. I couldn't have been more than 2 feet from where his cock was fully imbedded in her and all he was doing was rocking back and forth deep in her.

What a turn on to actually be there so close and see Suzanna climax like that. Knowing what he was feeling at that moment, no doubt feeling her pussy clench down on him and, no doubt, feeling her get wet inside as each time when he'd pull out I could see their glistening juices.

He hadn't cum yet but a moment later Suzanna seemed to almost collapse under him and that must have been the sign he was waiting for because it seemed that no sooner did she relax the stranglehold she had on him with her legs that he pushed her knees back and apart and it was obvious it was his turn!

As I said I'd been there before when they'd fucked but this was the first time I'd been so close that I could even reach out and touch them if I so wanted but I didn't. Nope, at that moment I all I wanted was to watch. Actually watching and waiting; that was really all what I wanted.

I can honestly say at that moment the only thing in the whole world I wanted was to see him plunge into her and fill her with his cum. It is almost as if I'd watched a whole movie and was simply now waiting for the final climactic moment. Dare I say I was even mentally rooting him on, almost pleading for him to take her harder and deeper. I might even say I almost winced in pain at how he seemed to be taking her and using her.

Her toes were curled as she bent her own knees and seemed to pull them back towards her breasts. Damn did that open her up and that seemed to do it. Squishing noises came out of her pussy as he violently took her over and over and a minute later - as she appeared to be totally out of breath - Dan finally pushed into her so hard and deep that I thought he'd bruise her.

Then I had the cuckold moment I'd wanted to feel for days or weeks (even months or years). I saw him arch his back and all his muscles clench in what seemed like slow motion. I could see his body spasm and him push his cock deeper into her several times over. I even thought I could see his cock itself spasm and see his cum shoot into her.

I swear if I hadn't still had my shorts on I would have cum all over the side of his bed. He stayed buried in her gently pushing into her and, as he did so all around with his cock still in her, I could see a whitish coloured liquid building around the edge. As he pushed in and out slowly it built up more and more until a drop began to form and run down from the bottom of his cock and down the bottom of her pussy towards her butt.

I think I was in a trance because the next few moments are kind of blurry but I do remember as Dan was catching his breath, Suzanna leaning her head out to one side and calmly saying to me, “did you enjoy that? I sure did!!”

A second later Dan pushed himself up onto his elbows and Suzanna relaxed her legs finally. I moved back but stayed on my knees as he also got to his knees and began to pull out of her.

I stayed back, almost savouring the moment I was seeing, when I heard Suzanna say, "you can come in closer and look if you want to!" and then she giggled and told Dan to wait a moment longer. I did what she asked and moved to one side of the bed. She took my hand and then said to Dan, "okay" and with that Suzanna and I both watched Dan ease his cock out of her.

"Is that what you wanted to see?" she asked me in a quiet voice. In the meanwhile Dan said something like, "let him look, I'm done now" or something like that as he got off the bed and went to get cleaned up.

Suzanna was still holding my hand when I leaned forward and gave her a kiss and then I started to work my way down her body. When I got to her breasts she pushed me away and reminded me that Dan didn't really want her having sex with me in his bedroom. Instead she said something like, "give me a few minutes and then I'll come down and you and I can have some fun". As she said that she reached into my shorts and gave my cock a good squeeze saying,” Mmm, another stiff one for me!" Then she literally shooed me out of the room when she heard him in the bathroom.

I felt strange walking back down the stairs into his den but 5 minutes later she came walking down the stairs, alone. She was still naked and even in the dim light she looked radiant. As she walked up to me she said, "I had fun tonight; I hope you did." I said something in agreement and she just said, and I'll never forget it, "I'm ready if you really must have me now". When I smiled and said, "oh yeah" all she said in return was that I should make it quick as Dan was showering upstairs.

I felt like a kid in a candy store. She sat back on the blankets on the couch and started to tease me again. She asked me, "how did I do?" in terms of turning things up a bit and as she spread her legs she said, "I hope Dan didn't make too much of a mess". Then she said it again, "... but you like me messy, don’t you?!”

Well, that was it for me; hearing her say that my cock reacted and could not have become any harder. I pushed my boxers down to my knees and moved in for my turn. Feeling her hot wetness was incredible. She pulled her knees back for me and just said, "it's your turn".

I took all of maybe two minutes in her. She knew she'd had me on the edge all night long and when she got in that position that was just-for-me, it was all I could do to even last that long. Feeling her all opened up and full of Dan's cum (even though she'd cleaned up a bit before coming back downstairs for me) she was still so wet inside that I slid right in and felt almost no resistance. I let my mind go to what I'd just seen and that was it, with little warning, I started to cum and cum. She squealed at how quickly I'd gotten off and all I could tell her was that she felt incredible and that I loved being with her and sharing the night with her.

It was about here where the evening gets fuzzy again. The most intense moments are so clear still but so much of the details are now just pleasant memories and feelings.

I know I felt a bit sheepish pulling out of her. I don’t know why but I think I felt a little embarrassed that I'd enjoyed myself so much while thinking about what I'd just witnessed.

I think it was at that moment that I realised that Suzanna seemed to really understand how I felt. I moved back on my knees and she just sat there on the couch holding her legs apart. Something she'd have been horrified to do only a year or so ago but there she was letting me see ALL of her, full of mine and Dan's cum. She just sat there like that and I felt like I was in a trance seeing her like that. After a moment of silence she said quietly, "why don’t you clean me up a bit; you'd like that, wouldn't you?”

I think I just nodded my head and leaned forward. Now I've eaten her and licked her clean after we've fucked many times and I'd done the same after Dan and Peter had been through with her but this was a first when I was going to get to go down on her after we'd both had her and it was obvious there was a good bit of cum still in her. She lay back and I tentatively leaned forward Then I simply pushed forward and put my tongue where our cocks had been. I knew I'd needed to cum for days and I knew I'd just left plenty in her that, plus what Dan had left in her, was now visibly waiting for me.

I leaned in and started to lick. Cautiously at first but as she put her hands on the back of my head, I lost my apprehension and started to really enjoy her. Something about feeling her body under me and feeling her muscles contracting and feeling and tasting more cum dribbling out of her! As I licked at her I heard Dan say something behind me (I didn't know he'd come downstairs) about, "he's enjoying that, isn't he?" or something like that. With that he left the room again and Suzanna and I were alone for a few more minutes. She pulled her hands off my head and I pulled away from her pussy and she giggled at how wet my face and chin was and then she kissed me and it was really erotic at that moment knowing she could taste what I'd just cleaned out of her.

After our kiss ended she said that I should probably go back upstairs now that Dan wasn't there and get my clothes together and that maybe I should head home and that she'd see me later. I pulled my shorts back up and went upstairs as she went into the kitchen still naked.

I have no recollection of getting dressed other than seeing the messed up bed and remembering what I'd just seen. I recall I came back downstairs and Suzanna came out of the kitchen, still naked, and seeming to be very comfortable too. She kissed me and said, "see you home later". I was going to say goodbye to Dan but she suggested I just slip out and that she wouldn't be too far behind me.

I left there (it had to be about 12:30am) and stopped for gas on the way home getting home a little after 1am. To my surprise Suzanna was maybe 15 minutes behind me (she didn't stop for gas!). I was waiting for her when she came in and surprised her with a hug.

She said it was good that I left when I did as she spent the last few minutes making out with Dan before she left. She then told me that she didn't think that Dan knew I'd had sex with her as all he talked about was how I seemed to enjoy going down on her (which explained what he was saying when he came in on me and her).

We both cleaned up in the bathroom together and she asked me if I'd enjoyed myself. I said I had and she asked if she'd, "done a good job" in giving me more of what I wanted. I said that she had done great and that we'd talk more about it over the weekend.


I have to say that Saturday when we got up I felt sort of uneasy. Everything happened so fast that it really didn't all sink in until that morning. I think she felt a bit on edge about it too because neither of us could really talk about it yet.

After breakfast, once the kids found their own plans for the day, we went upstairs and it just started. She was all concerned that she'd pushed things too far. I told her I was confused because I didn't know what to feel or how to react with Dan there. She apologized and started to tell me what she'd said to him and the like.

It would take the next 2 days for us to get through all of this stuff.

When she first suggested to Dan that I wanted to come along again he asked her what was it she wanted. Apparently she'd told him in their prior time together that I had wanted to be there so I don’t think this was a surprise to him when she said she wanted me to be there. She added that was when he also said that he still didn't want us in his room.

I told her I was still confused at what went on in the bar and she said that when she'd gotten to his place that they, as she put it, "started quickly". It was while they were having sex that she told him that I wanted to be there and watch. She said that she sort of told him that I wanted to see and know more about them.

I did want to know more about their quickie before coming to meet me but I was actually more interested in understanding what was going on.

She said that after they'd finished that he'd asked her more about me and that he's never really understood why I want her to have sex with him but that he's stopped asking about it. That's when she told him that she wanted to, "flaunt it more" in front of me. He apparently said he'd try to go along with it but that he wasn't sure how it'd be.

So I still wanted to know what she was thinking and I finally asked her, "what about you and me?".

She stopped and realized that I wasn't interested in Dan. She hugged me and told me she loved me and that all she was thinking about was what I'd asked her to do.

Maybe the old saying that alcohol brings the truth out could be true? That's what Suzanna said that she was feeling good and had a few drinks and that she just went with it at the bar. When I arrived she told herself, "what the heck" and she came over to me and took me in the back.

She said when she felt my reaction (I hadn't remembered her feeling me) through my pants that she said she felt empowered to let it go and see what happened.

She giggled that apparently Dan didn't know what Suzanna had done until after she did it and she said that, with that, Dan said he'd go along and play along with her lead. That was what led to him and her making comments that I thought others were going to hear and the like.

We were talking so easily and openly at one point that I told her that what she'd done did turn me on, especially greeting me like that at the bar, but I was honest and I told her that I didn't think I really wanted it going beyond just us in any way.

I actually found it easier to open up the conversation and just say what I wanted instead of asking her a question and then somehow leading up to what I wanted to say which is what I'd done in the past.

We talked so much that it was either Saturday night or Sunday morning when we finally got to the point where she seemed to understand more about what I wanted to feel. I don’t really know what I said specifically but she seemed to finally grasp the fact that I wanted to truly experience her full sexual desires for another guy, even if her desires deny me at times. I think she may have felt reluctant to accept it as my longing for now or something like that but the more we talked and the more I told her of my enjoyment of various things, the more she seemed to come to simply accept it.

I opened up to her last night even more when she asked me to tell her what I liked out of the night and what I wanted. I told her again that having her greet me like that at the bar was incredibly arousing. She asked me why and I told her that just knowing he'd fucked her an hour or maybe less and that she wanted me to feel the ‘evidence’ really turned me on. I told her that her walking around like that, still wet from him, turned me on a lot too.

She asked if how they behaved in the bar was okay. I gulped and swallowed hard when I said yes to that part. I confessed that him rubbing against her butt at the pool table or that quick but passionate kiss as they'd leave the dance floor was exciting but I was honest and told her that it was more the little things that turned me on like how he'd touch her as he talked to her and how she'd blink her eyes at him. She almost seemed to disbelieve me but she realized I was telling her the truth and she just hugged me and held me close and said she loved me so much.

As she let go of me she just said, "tell me more" so I asked her how she felt at those moments; that I needed to hear her answer and I was ready to hear whatever she answered.

She told me that those moments are very touching to her and that when she is lost in the moment with him, that they feel like they're in a fairy tale.

I seized the moment and just said it, "do you love him?"

I looked at the clock and it was 8:42pm and there was total silence in our bedroom for a moment until she said, "Why did you have to ask me that?"

I told her that it was okay, that I knew it was bound to happen just like it did with Peter and that was when she stopped me and said, "No. Peter was very different. Apparently you don’t know and maybe that's better" A second later she said, "you have nothing to worry about with Dan. Yes I do love him but it is nothing like what I feel for you or felt for Peter".

I hugged her, that was all I could think of to do and I just said, "okay" and, "I love you". She hugged me so at that moment and she said she loved me too. When she let go she smiled and said that she cared very much for him but that he was just a good friend and he would never be more. I joked that he must be a ‘very good friend’ and she giggled at that and said, "yeah, you could certainly say that!”

While we'd both been pretty worn out from Friday night and the bottle of wine we had while we talked after dinner on Saturday both led to the night off, the closeness we felt after our talk last night spilled over after the kids were off for the night into a passionate bout of love-making.

It wasn't without its teasing as Suzanna even teased me about, "will you be able to cum if you're not second?" at one point. At other points, feeling our bodies as one and looking in her eyes and knowing it was being returned is a moment that again makes me know all of this is right.

I wasn't pounding away at her as we both reached orgasm. She went off first going stiff against me and pulling me against her but I was only moving a little in and out of her. I loved feeling her body shake under me and feel her pussy seeming to squeeze my cock. I followed shortly behind buried deep in her just moving a little in and out. It was great feeling so close to her.

She brought a washcloth back to bed and cleaned us up to watch something on TV before going to sleep. As she flipped around and we lay next to each other still naked she asked me if I liked watching her and Dan have sex and then joked, "were you close enough?!"

It was my turn to giggle my response that it was really wild watching like that. A few moments later she quietly asked me, "did you like watching him cum in me?"

I was taken a bit by surprise by that question but I took a deep breath and managed to say, "yeah, it was crazy being right there for that!” She pulled me close and said I was the crazy one and I gave her the corny line of, "I'm crazy for you in return".

Today was our normal Monday but I'm still reeling from everything that happened. I re-read what I'd written earlier and it got me so aroused again that I'm going to go have some fun before I turn in for bed. Suzanna's already asleep as it's after midnight now.


Time for a new book!