Journal of a Journey - Book 72

Despite a long day for both of us, I was horny last night and even though Suzanna said she was tired she told me she always likes to watch me. She pretty much just lay next to me and told me how sexy it was to watch me; very little teasing and taunting from her, just feeling the warmth of her next to me. She told me to pretend she wasn't there and to enjoy myself. She didn't ask me what I was thinking about and just let me enjoy the moment. I don't think I have to tell anyone the thoughts that arouse the most. I did hear her give out a slight but definite moan when I finally came and at that point, despite her tiredness, she did reach over and play with my cum. She let me lick her fingers off but I could just tell she was tired and wasn't into scooping it all up and feeding it to me, instead she reached for a tissue and wiped it up for me and then kissed me and sort of half-apologized for being so tired.

We have talked a bit more about college classes and I told her that unless she's really serious about a real degree, that it's probably not a good idea taking a class like we'd talked, accounting or economics. Her concern was that she'd feel like an old lady in what's a 100-level class and her being with kids that are the age of our own kids. That, plus the cost and pressure she'd find herself under to actually do well...!

The more we talked the more we agreed that maybe another adult-ed class might be a better idea or perhaps to go online and find someone through that route but the reality is that she just doesn't want to do that. She doesn't feel comfortable basically advertising that she wants to find a lover, she said. "it would make me feel cheap and slutty".

From my own perspective, I understand her, it's the same thing she said about when we went to a swing club many years ago, that she felt cheap and slutty basically being there to find another guy to have sex with. Yes, it was exciting and I'm sure if we went back that with the right amount of alcohol, now she'd probably run off with another guy for a while but we agreed that we are looking for someone for a longer duration than just a horny one-night-stand. She wants to feel wanted and for the desire to build. (Someone like Glenn maybe but someone with a lot more chemistry and desire!)

The other thing that we've talked a bit about is just how we are feeling overall. She came to me and started to say how close we seem to be these past few months and that she is seeing that what I'd said long ago is something she sees more clearly now, that we're both enjoying opposite sides of the same coin.

It also come out is her admission for all of the things she wants to do which she says that she couldn't (wouldn't?) do it if she wasn't sure that it was something I wanted and would turn me on. She said that if I wasn't into it, that she doesn't think she could let herself go and be with another guy much less find a lover to have her 'affair' with. As we talked she told me that after 30 years together that I am a part of her and that she feels sexually we are one person and that what she does is what I feel and what I want is what she feels. It was weird how she put it but I understood her meaning and I have to say, hearing her say something like that made me feel very reassured about our future. She also said that we could go back to 'normal' as we seem to have no trouble in doing after the opposite situation of when she was seeing Robert. It was something she felt really good about, knowing that after all of what went on with Robert and before, that we were able to do that, going back to being 'normal' (well, as normal as normal can be for us).


Yesterday Suzanna called me at work and said the kids would both be staying at friends overnight last night. I got 'the message' and came home as soon as I could.

She got home before me and already seemed horny to me when I walked in. With the house to ourselves and the apparent arousal in her, we moved to kissing and then passionately making out on the couch and the floor in the living room. It's been a while since we'd been adventurous and within a little bit I had her naked and leaning forward against the couch with me behind her licking her pussy and teasing her clit and just taunting her ass. Her pussy was throbbing as I licked at it and each time made her moan deeply.

It didn't take long until I knelt up behind her and pulled her wide open and pushed my stiff cock into her. She moaned as she leaned forward and gave herself to me. I felt her really start to respond as I reached around and gently teased her little bud. A moment later she hunched herself back to me and I felt her deeply orgasm as she held herself still with me buried in her. I was so tempted to just ride her as she lay there for me but instead, I pulled out of her and she eagerly turned around to suck me clean. She looked up at me and asked me why I'd stopped and I told her that the night was young but that I wanted her to be naked for the rest of the night.

She smiled, said, "okay" and went up to our bedroom and soon came back in just one of my button-up shirts saying that, "I'll get in the mood more this way ..." and then added with a laugh, "... and you can have a little of how I'll be with my boyfriend". She threw me a pair of silky boxers which did little to hide my still hard cock and then pulled me down to the couch with her. We kissed some more and she asked me what had gotten into me.

I wasn't going to tell her at first but then thought, "why not?" I told her that as I licked her and then mounted her from behind, that I was imagining what Dan must have felt as he did her like that and I said, "you remember that time?" She smiled as she knew it too, she kissed me and said, "you were so horny that night...... I loved sharing that moment with you baby".

We had plenty of leftovers in the fridge and opened a bottle of wine and all the while, I just found myself staring at her, seeing glimpses of her breasts and of her bare pussy when she sat down. I knew she missed this feeling and even though it was with me last night, I think it really stoked up her desires. Several points during the evening she said that, "I can't wait till we can do this all the time ...” Both of us are eagerly waiting for Labor Day and at times, when we get a taste of what it'll be like without kids around; it's intoxicating....!

After dinner and over several glasses of wine we again adjourned to the living room where I again feasted on her pussy. I told her I wanted her to be really horny and ready for me. I didn't tell her but she knew that I also loved it when she'd already had several orgasms as it left her pussy in this deliciously relaxed state.

It was getting dark and we turned the lights off in the house so we could be virtually naked without being seen and again I turned her so she'd kneel on the couch in front of the picture window and this time, in the darkness she let herself go a little more and more with each thrust into her. With no one home she felt no need to keep quiet and her moans grew louder as I felt her pussy gush as a deep orgasm swept over her.

She pushed me away and giggled at me as I stood there with my wet cock bobbing away and then the teasing started, "Maybe that's all you'll get tonight .... how would that be baby? You made me cum already, maybe that's enough for me". She giggled and slowly lay back and as she spread her legs for me she said, "one day though baby, I might say that to you for real" and she moaned as she ran one of her fingers down to her little button and began to rub. As I moved closer she turned up the teasing, "maybe you'll only get to make me cum, how would that be?" and she grabbed my cock and began to rub it all over her spread pussy, pushing it into her wet openness and then pulling it out and rubbing it up and down. I started to moan and she giggled and said, "... would that be okay for you baby? You know, when I have a boyfriend who wants me just for himself".

She was really turning it up. Without pushing into her I was at her mercy with her slow strokes as she teased me. She ran her hand from the bottom slowly up to the top and teasingly looked at my cock and as if she were talking to it she said, "would you like it if you just had my hands and my mouth?" and with that she leaned over and sucked the tip into her mouth. She looked up at me with this really sexy horny grin and she said, "mmmm, I can taste you" and then she seemed to start to almost role play and she said, "mmmm, my boyfriend says I can only suck you baby.... he doesn't want you using his pussy any more" My cock must have started to really throb because then she moaned deeply and said something like, "you'll have to ask his permission" and that's when I really started to get horny.

Then, all of a sudden she just let go of my cock and said, "okay baby, time for a little break" and just like that she slid off the couch and went into the dark kitchen to get another glass of wine. She came back and stood there naked in front of me and she giggled (I realized around then that we were well into our 2nd bottle of wine and she was quite buzzed) and said, "this is how I felt when I would hang out with Robert" and she told me that a lot of the time they'd do just what we'd done so far, that, "he'd fuck me for a while and make me cum and then we'd take a break and then he'd start again".

Oh god did that do it for me, I told her she was driving me crazy and she smiled and said, "I know, you look soooo turned on" as she pointed to my hard cock. She stood up and came up to me and held my cock with one hand as she kissed me. I guess the wine had really relaxed her because she was acting so sexy and the way she was talking was just incredible. She kissed me and, referring to Robert ,said, "I miss fucking him"

I moaned back that, "I'll just have to do for tonight."

She replied ,"I love you baby".

She was stroking my cock and rubbing pre-cum all over the tip and I could feel that if she didn't stop soon I was going to cum. She kissed me and kept it up until just at the point I was going to stop her she pulled her hand off of my cock and said, "come upstairs and fuck me in my husband's and my bed" and she turned and walked up the stairs. I stood for a second watching her and all the while just thinking and imagining her like this with Robert.

By the time I came into the bedroom she was on the bed and was rubbing her pussy with 'Jim' her dildo. She looked up at me and said, "Jim should go first, don't you think?" ... and that was my cue to take over. Her pussy was drenched and Jim slid into her without any effort. My god my cock was throbbing as I thought about how she'll feel when it's finally my turn.

Jim fucked her for several minutes while I kissed her and caressed her breasts, but when I moved down and licked and played with her clit she let herself go into a very visible and very loud orgasm. Jim slipped in and out of her over and over and I had to hold him in her as she rode out her orgasm. Finally when she lay back and the tension left her body she raised her knees and pulled them back and said, "now it's your turn baby".

What a feeling; I just love how she feels gaping open and wet throughout. The squishing sounds as I fucked her deeply only got louder and louder. She moaned up at me that she was, "so sore from fucking Jim so much" and that I "... should just enjoy yourself". I hitched her knees around my arms and spread her wide. She looked up at me and kept the teasing up, "Robert liked me like this....”

You cannot imagine how turned on that made me to look down at her and know that Robert, Glenn and others have all fucked her just like this. Now it was my turn again and as I really started in on her she began to moan. I had enough visions in my head from her teasing that I didn't even really hear what she may have been saying. Feeling how well Jim had left her pussy gaping open had me at the edge in no time and after having been edged up so many times already last night, by the time I was on top of her again like this, it was all I could do to make it last but, in the end, I felt the urge and she knew it too. I felt her pull her knees back and close them together a bit as if to tighten her pussy and that did it for me, I started to spew in her and her eyes opened like saucers as she felt the first spurts in her. As I rode her she slowly closed her eyes and laid her head back and she began to moan loudly. I was down to the last few drops and the last few deep thrusts when I felt her start to shake and convulse. Her eyes opened but she wasn't seeing anything. Her head thrashed back and forth and her pussy went from being tight like a vice to feeling like a gaping cavern as she rode out her final orgasm. Finally just as my cock was softening and about to slip out of her, she let out a deep sigh and lay back, finally felt sated. My cock slipped out and I lay against her chest and we both lay there breathing heavingly together.

She admitted that the wine had really lowered her inhibitions and the surprise of me seducing her in the living room seemed to suddenly make her very aware that we had the house to ourselves. I admitted that being able to be loud anywhere in the house was a welcome freedom whereas she said the real key to our Friday night was that she really needed to just 'get fucked'!

I could tell last time she saw Glenn that she needed to go out and let herself go but this time it was me that did it for her and we did it at home! In the past I've often said I needed to take her away from our home-life to get her to really let go but maybe the reality of September coupled with the hectic pace of the last few weeks is enough to get her to embrace any time we have together alone.

I'm not complaining; that fuck on Friday night was satisfying enough for me all day yesterday and even today I have this content feeling all over ... but that's not to say that she couldn't easily get me up for another round tonight.


Crazy thought, should I call Dan back and take him out to dinner and apologize for what happened at the end. He would be perfect for us now and give us what we both want; a crazy idea for sure!

I think things ended too bitterly for Suzanna to ever consider going back with him. When we look back at that time we both see that neither of us was ready for what Dan wanted (I'm not sure he knew what he wanted, whether he was a bull or a dom but didn't really know it!). I just know that she was hurt by what happened and even though she may now better understand those times as we have talked about it, I don't know that she can excuse how bad he made her feel so best I don't go there.

That kind of denial is something we've talked about. The other night after we were done and were cleaning up she turned to me and asked me if I was sure I still 'wanted to give it up for a while'.

It was just a casual post-sex conversation, not awkward at all which is kind of a big thing in itself, but she was serious and I told her that after being the alpha again for the past 7+ months that the longer it went on that, "yes, the more it was going to impact me when she decided it was time". She had a concerned look until I told her again that I still very much wanted to experience being the beta-male for her for a longer and perhaps more intense period.

She told me she shared the same concerns, that she's enjoying sex with me and is anxious about changing our dynamic, but at the same time she has made it very clear that she very much wants to be with other men and still very much wants to find her 'Mr. Right'.

None of these have been deep intense conversations as, for me at least, it is something that we both know and accept. Our occasional chat seems to be just that, something that reassures us on both sides that we both enjoy what we have now but that we both still want to explore more of the cuckold things. She's asked me if I think about it when we're having sex and I've told her honestly it is always on my mind, that in my head when we're making love it could be one of the last times I get to enjoy her. She thinks its sexy that it still turns me on as much as it does.

The only other thing I can say is that we're now looking at taking a bit of a vacation in early October. So, while she still has thoughts about other guys, it's also nice to see her looking forward to being with me. Not sure where we might go to, maybe back to Jamaica as she's said she'd like to have the feeling of extending our summer a bit longer; maybe somewhere else. I can say that we probably won't go to Hedo this time around but what we did hear is that Sandals is right next door and that for $50 you can do a walk-in/day-visit at Hedo so that may work out after all that way. To be honest, part of the issue is that our ****** and others will want to see pictures like we took last time we were there and it'd be hard to explain why no souvenirs or other stuff says Sandals on it! But you never know, we'll be talking more this weekend and starting to price things out. I do think that going to a resort-like place she would feel more comfortable, even more than a swing-club or party-place like that; being able to enjoy the nude beach would be a big help.


Last night continued our usual routine. She no longer has to ask me if I'm in the mood. I going to say that I almost look forward to it as much as I do actually having sex with her (which is both a comforting and disturbing feeling). I love stripping down and letting her see just how hard and horny I am, the look on her face and the closeness we both feel as she watches and helps, encourages and then teases me is really nice.

She had on just her long night-t-shirt and began her teasing by actually spending maybe 15 minutes exercising in front of me including her back-stretches which pulled the material taut across her breasts and her hard nipples were totally visible! When she did her back-bridge thing and arched herself backwards, her pussy was visible in all its glory. With her legs spread, as she lay back, her pussy spread apart by itself and revealed the wet pink interior. She knew I was watching and then teased, "Aww, did it get you turned on seeing my pussy?" I groaned back and she knew it did because of how hard I was.

I felt her nipples on my arm as she sidled up to me and cooed again at how horny it makes her to see me masturbate for her. Again she teased me about 'was it making me horny thinking about her being so wet from her lover and me getting to see it?' I was horny enough as it was and I told her she was adding to it. She turned to look at me and kissed me and then said, "tell me what you're horny about baby..... what are you thinking about?".

Sometimes I can't exactly say what I am thinking about that turned me on but last night it turned out I'd watched a dirty video earlier with a woman in it who looked much like Suzanna who enjoyed having her lover first and then her husband and that I'd read a story about something similar. So when she asked I told her just that. She giggled and said, "did she enjoy it like I did?" and then she asked me what story was about. I told her it was about a husband who did what I did, helped his wife get ready for a date and then how he enjoyed her when she returned.

She knew I was pretty horny already and she started to tell me how much that sounded like me and then she teased, "I know how much you like that ..... think about me being all creamy and wet for you". We bantered back and forth like this with me telling her how she knew how much I liked that and she emphasized, "I know you like knowing he was in me before you".

I moaned back and eventually admitted to her that I missed the excitement and arousal and then added, "even if it did mean denying me at times".

Wow, did that make her moan and coo and she said, "mmmm, that makes me so horny too baby..... seeing how much you want me but knowing you can't have me".

She said more but that was all I heard and a few moments later I felt my back tighten and my balls start to throb. I must have started really stroking away because she moaned and leaned down even closer to watch. I held off as much as I could until the very end when I couldn't any longer. All sorts of thoughts filled my head but honestly, I loved opening my eyes and seeing her so intently glued to watching me. A few strokes later I erupted all over my stomach and hand and I heard her moan deeply and even thought I felt the bed move a bit, maybe from her rubbing her legs together.

It was a good cum for me. Sometimes it's not as deep or intense but last night I was into it and could feel I'd cum a lot and that was confirmed when she started to run her fingers through it and I heard her say, "oooh, there's a lot here baby; do you think my next lover will cum this much?"


Both of us are eager for her to find another regular guy again. Sometimes I guess I underplay that part of things. I mean we've talked, sometimes at length, about the excitement and energy that there was between us when she was seeing Robert. She even said that she really enjoyed how things were between us, that knowing sex wasn't the most important thing between us made us realize and appreciate everything we share a bit more.

She has an undeniable sense of energy around her, understandably so, and I too loved the feeling of being on edge; I loved the thoughts and feelings that I had about her which were intensified when I was using condoms with her. I was concerned about telling her this but also felt that I should be able to. I didn't want her to feel like I was unhappy with her now by saying that I missed it. It turned out my concerns were misguided as she said that she felt a lot of the same things and admitted that while she loved how we are now, that she too missed feeling so comfortable with another guy. We both laughed when she said that she didn't want to hurt me by what she said too.


Wednesday night and we followed our usual routine. It's become something that just feels normal for us now and as I've said, something I look forward to and I know Suzanna does too.

She was very cuddly last night and very playful, encouraging me to tell her details of what I found so erotic and what turned me on so much. It wasn't easy but she pushed and I opened up. As I masturbated I told her what I've told her many times before and she loved hearing it again. She moaned and cooed as I told her how it turned me on to think of her lover fucking her, his cock deep inside her and obviously, him cumming in her. It felt good to be able to say it and for her to be excited by how excited I was. I'm not sure if that makes sense.

As I talked she moved closer and then pulled up the front of her night-shirt and said, "see if you can feel how wet my boyfriend left me". I let my fingers move down her body, past her shirt, then down her hip and then, I was so turned on as I felt her bare pussy, and let my fingers slide through her pussy lips. She was so wet! I reached down and she spread her legs slightly and I could feel the wetness seeping out of her. She moaned and in the next few minutes she let me push my fingers into her and she teased me about, "feel how much he cums in me" and that did it. Wow, did I let go; enough that she backed her head up from where it was resting on my chest as I came rather forcefully. She kissed me as I licked the tangy goo from her fingers and seemed to moan at being turned on by it all.

Thing was, we lay there watching some skimpily clad women in a soft porn video on TV and I found myself getting horny again. I wasn't really doing it consciously but my hand had gone to my cock and was gently stroking it almost subconsciously. She noticed and pulled the cover back and said, "awww, is my baby horny again" and then she encouraged me to cum again for her. I thought she'd tease me more but instead she seemed even hornier this time watching me and I swore she was rubbing herself. I had that pleasant ache that I feel after I've cum once already and am horned up for a second time. A million thoughts were in my head but visions of her with her legs spread for her boyfriend did the trick the second time around. It may have just been a little dribble of cum that second time but it felt awesome! She sidled up and kissed my neck and ear and told me how sexy it was to watch me.

So, I'm sitting here working from home today feeling well drained and very well satisfied.


Last night in bed she told me that she thinks she has someone's attention. There's a restaurant right near where Suzanna works and she told me that she is meeting someone there for lunch today. All she told me is that he works nearby, that his name is Paul and that he's tall with dark hair (her type). She said it's nothing, just going to get lunch and sit outside and eat together.

I was not convinced. I looked at her and said, "someone's been asked out on a date!" to which she blushed and said, "it's not a date".

I replied, "Let's get this straight. It's that Paul guy who asked you the other day. You said you couldn't make it and he said 'how about Friday' and you said 'yes'. That's a date". She giggled and said, "maybe it is".

I asked her more but she said she knows nothing about him other than he likes the restaurant's tuna fish which is what he's ordered every time they've been together on line waiting to order. I asked her how many times she's seen him and said hello and she said, "at least 4 or 5 times in the past month or so".

For it not being a lunch-date, she was awfully perky this morning!


I'm home but she's not yet so all I know is that she did meet him for lunch and they talked. When we spoke on the phone this afternoon she said she'd tell me more when she got home later tonight.

******

Suzanna met him for lunch on Friday. The conversation was very interesting. It was a beautiful day out and she said that they were able to talk more easily eating at the outdoor tables than she would have been indoors.

She said he was very complimentary and said that she'd attracted his attention when he'd seen her on line for lunch in some of the past weeks. After some idle talk where she says she was already aware that he was interested in her she said he came out and said, "I have to ask you something". She couldn't figure out what why he said that until he said that he didn't want to seem disrespectful (or something like that) but he looked at her and, pointing to her wedding rings, said something like, "what's your story?" He said he'd seen her for several weeks (when she was going to her photography class I guess) when she didn't have them on and then she was wearing them when he asked her to meet for lunch.

Now this came out over the weekend but she admitted that she'd obviously already begun to think of him sexually when he'd talked to her last week the first time. She later told me that she remembered that her less-than-honest situation with Glenn had backfired on her by limiting what could and couldn't happen so when he first started to say something about her rings she was already thinking about how to answer him.

I was actually very interested in what she said. She told me she thought about telling him that we'd been separated for a little while but then she thought that might work against her as he might feel he should leave her alone to repair her marriage. So instead she looked at him and said something like, "well, that's a long story" and that she really looked for his body language in what happened next.

He leaned forward towards her, his arms on the table and, as she said, with a smile on his face and he said, "I'm interested".

She said she suddenly felt very '*******' (her words) but she took a deep breath and said something in a round-about way that basically said, "I’m 53, soon to be 54 years old and my husband lets me have fun when I want to".

I wasn't sure where this was going until she said that he smiled and didn't make her feel awkward or uneasy at all when he said, "that's nice" and a second later he added, "I'd like us to get to know each other if you'd like that".

And so it happened. Over the rest of lunch she said she found herself feeling shy, embarrassed and very sexy all at the same time but that he was a gentleman even if he did leer a bit more at her as they talked.

He told her he's an accountant at a nearby firm. Not a partner but secure enough to have flexibility in his work-hours. She said he is 45 years old and divorced for 'many years'. His office is near the shopping centre where they met for lunch and his home, a condo, is nearby. He lives alone but has 2 older kids who sometimes visit for periods of time but are on their own.

She said they didn't talk about sex at all during lunch. He never asked more about what kind of 'fun' or anything like that, instead they talked about general things, what types of food she liked; what kinds of movies and music. He talked about some of the rock-concerts he's been to which including some that we attended too. Towards the end of lunch the conversation moved towards what each of them wanted in their future. Suzanna said she talked about her and me and our ******.

She told me that she deliberately bought that into the conversation so that she could see his response. I told her that I was impressed that she was so much on-top of things and had given it that much thought but she said that's why she hadn't told me right away, that she still wanted to work stuff out in her head. I asked her how he responded and she said that he too mentioned his own ****** and wanting to spend time with them but that also wanted to travel and enjoy things like they'd talked about, good food, movies and such too.

When I asked her, "so, what else?"

She said that she too didn't know what was going to happen next so she used the 'I have to get back to work' thing to push the conversation ahead. As she went to get up she said he took her tray and stuff and as he got up with her he casually asked her, "can we get together again?” I was eager to hear her answer so she said, "sure, next week for lunch again?" and they agreed to meet next Wednesday but at a different restaurant. They didn't kiss or anything like that but he did touch her arm when he said, "hope you have a great weekend" and she replied back, "you too". She said he gave her his business card and she gave him her's which she added her personal email address and cellphone number on gave to him.

The smile on her face and the fact that I don't think her feet touched the ground the rest of the afternoon told me that she'd been thrilled by it all. I joked with her that she liked being 'asked out on a date'. She smiled and hugged me and said that the best part was that she'd been honest with him.

She’s made it very clear that she isn't rushing into this. She says she's already suggested plenty in her answer and that she's gotten an Email from him already and they've discussed going to a different local restaurant for lunch on Wednesday.

When we talked about it, she's said very much that she wants this to happen like it did with Robert where he really worked to woo and seduce her. She said he was very nice in his email to her where they discussed meeting for lunch on Wednesday and I teased her again about, "he's got a crush on you!" taking a cue from something that our ******** would say!

It was obvious from how wet and horny she was on Friday night that she's turned on by him. I'm not sure if it's him or the whole thing as she's just been so fired up in general since last week anyway. In bed we certainly talked about what she was thinking and she laughed when I mentioned that her arousal last Wednesday was in part due to her thinking about him. She giggled when she said he has big-hands and big-feet so she's hoping the old wives-tale holds true.

She said that when I talked to her last Wednesday where I told her what turned me on to think about that she was thinking about it in terms of Paul and she admitted that her own self-pleasure was in thinking about him.

One thing that we clearly talked about was me and what she thought was going to happen. She said that he seems like a really nice guy and that in some ways he reminded her of me. As we talked she said that he didn't seem concerned at all when she talked about me letting her 'have fun'.

I asked her what SHE wanted to happen and the first part of her answer was that she wanted all of us, the 3 of us, to feel comfortable together. I clearly pushed her on that and said that she'd like us to all be able to get together. When I pushed her she said that she'd like us to be able to do 3-somes and stuff, "like we used to do".

When I asked what happens after that she was a little vague and said sincerely that, "it depends on what happens between us" (meaning her and Paul). I was nervous asking her but did so anyway and I asked her, "are you still hoping for everything you were?”

She answered me honestly and said that she didn't know if Paul was 'Mr. Right' or not just yet (obviously) and that she wasn't very clear on just how he'd feel about everything. She didn't properly answered me so I asked her again. This time she said "yes, if it's what I want, then yes honey, okay". I sensed a slight annoyance in her voice.

Mention of Paul in bed between Friday and last night brought about quite the response from her whether she knew it or not. Of course a little red-wine never hurt to let her get into her own thoughts a bit more.


When she came home on Friday night there was no doubt she was turned on. There was this deeper look in her eye and almost a more day-dreamy look to the way she stared and seemed to be caught up in thought at times. She was very turned on and made no secret to me about it before dinner. She even came up to me and said something about it being, "too bad you missed me getting changed upstairs" which got me curious so I went up and found not only had she changed her clothes, she'd also changed her panties too. I won't say they were drenching wet but they were quite damp and, yes, quite fragrant.

When we got into bed later that night she was quite animated and far from her usual end-of-work-week tiredness (I thought to myself that a new man seems to bring a new energy to her). We talked and we teased each other about the possibilities of Paul and she teased me whether I was, "ready to share my pussy with a new guy?"

I teased her back with whether she was, "ready to let another man enjoy you intimately". Wow did she juice-up at my teasing, especially when I asked her, "how excited are you going to be the first time you get to be with him?".

The frenzy of us having sex on both Friday night and last night was strongly fuelled by both of us speculating how he might be in bed. She took particular pleasure in dwelling on, "how big he might be" based on him having 'big hands and feet'! I quite enjoyed the thoughts of how he might take her doggy-style and how she will feel with his hands on her hips pulling her forcefully to him.

Needless to say, both times left us hot, sweaty and panting for breath after we fucked till we were both spent.


She saw me looking at her this morning after she came out of the shower. I saw that she must have used a razor to touch up her bare pussy (I could feel the stubble last night) and she smiled as she saw me staring. I can't describe the excitement I felt looking at her knowing he may soon see and share her naked body.

She is now convinced that she should stop looking for other guys. Once again, I’m really pleased that it’s her controlling the pace and me not pushing it or pushing her to accelerate things. I thought she handled the whole situation regarding me quite well and I even commented on it. She said she regretted how she did things with Glenn and then also said that she'd even regretted things with Robert and me, so hopefully she is aware enough of herself and things in general that this time it works out.

I think she showed her desires by how things went this past weekend but I guess I should have also commented that I don't want to bring her down or burst her bubble by telling her that it's tough to know anything for certain based on just a 1 hour lunch-date so far. Then again a part of me also wondered if maybe this whole cuckold/hotwife thing is perhaps more common than we'd have thought based on his response to her confession about her husband letting her 'have fun'..

It goes without saying that seeing her desires develop is something that really turns me on. Not just because I benefit while these desires are growing but also definitely because I hope this time to be a part of experiencing them with her. I loved that she wants this to be something the 3 of us can share at first and that more desire will come over time but even that is jumping the gun because I fully expect her to tease and drag things out with Paul knowing that she wants to be seduced by him. She's compared that several times now to how Robert started with her and how wonderfully that turned out for her.

I know when we've talked in more detail, as we did again over this weekend, that it's easy for both of us to see how a 3-some or even me watching them first and then taking my turn would be something that could happen. Both of us feel at a gap when we talk about going beyond that and how that would happen and how she'd convey that to him much less how that would change things. Every time we talk about it we both come to the conclusion that it's so dependent on whom the other man is that we both find it hard to anticipate just how that will work out if it does happen.

I know it'll burst some bubbles but she's also talked about this just being an open-sexual relationship with him that may not go further. She said, "it could be like Frank was, nice but never quite gets the pot to boil over". I had to laugh at her comparison.


It’s good to see that she's setting things right from the start this time. I just find it somewhat interesting that he was attracted to her as he says he was. A part of me suspects that this may have been in motion for longer than Suzanna has let on to me. Something about it has my radar up but she seems genuinely excited about it so perhaps it's my own thoughts that I'm letting run. I do like that she's taking it slowly as compared to Glenn who she seemed predetermined to have a fling (as she calls it now) with him. In a way, it would be nice to be moving ahead with all of this already as if there was ever a time then it's now. I'd also like to get to meet him sooner than later and I told her that; she agreed.

Indeed, to go one further, she even said she'd like for us to all meet before she has sex with him the first time. I was surprised at that but then she looked at me and said that she wanted to be sure this was going to work for me before it went too far. I told her that wasn't totally necessary and reminded her that she'd not really asked my opinion in the past. She smiled at me as we talked about it just before she got into bed tonight and she looked at me and held my hand and said, "that's because we weren't really able to talk about all of this back then". She kissed me and said that she knew that it would be better for me it we could talk about it and she said that she knew that would only really happen if I felt okay about who he was.

I started to tell her where we could meet but she stopped me and said that now I was the one who was rushing things. "Let me get to know him a little first baby, make sure I'm comfortable and then I promise...." and before I could say another word she shushed me and said, "let it go till I come home on Wednesday, okay".

I'm horny for Wednesday night already!

******

... and there goes another book. Time to find a fresh one.