Journal of a Journey - Book 47

Last night and she got home about 5pm and it was obvious to me from the moment she got out of the car that she'd spent the last few hours having sex. Her hair was in place but there was no doubt it'd been strewn about (she said the wind had blown it on the way home) but it was more how she carried herself, how she walked and the look on her face as if she'd just woken up, so relaxed and satisfied, the glow about her just turned me on.

Everyone was home and we sat and talked together but all the while I'm knowing how she must have been beneath her pants and panties; it just made me so horny. Then we decided to go out to eat and she said she needed to get changed so I followed her up to the bedroom.

She closed the door and looked at me and asked if I was horny, already knowing the answer. Then she asked me when I'd cum last. I told her on Thursday and she smiled and said then we can have some fun later tonight and then said that if I really wanted that she'd let me 'help her' again as she likes to call it for me going down on her.

I told her that I always loved to share in the moment with her and she said ,"okay, but this is for you... " giggled and said something like, "... I've had all I can take already".

I admit it was kind of a repeat from the other night but at the same time it struck me that she was going to get undressed (or I was going to help) and that I wasn't. I liked that she was doing this for me and at the same time, that she enjoyed it herself too. She slipped off her top but left her bra on. She slid off her pants then looked at me and as she lay back against the bed said, "you can take my panties off" and then added "it's what you want".

As I reached under her to pull them down she said, "he was really horny this afternoon". I saw the outline of one of her period-pads which made me wonder as she hasn't had a period in probably 2 years or more now. Then I realized as I slid off her panties that she'd bought them again because of just this and my thoughts were confirmed. She looked at me as she saw me staring and said, "I'd be a mess if I didn't have that with me". The centre of the pad was a dark compared to the rest of it.

I guess I was daydreaming again because she did an 'ahem' lay back and said, "be quick okay". As before as I leaned in and she felt my hands on the insides of her thighs, she said, "just the outside, remember".

I ran my tongue just around the edge which made her let out this sexy moan. She pulled back as I gently teased what I could reach with my tongue in the middle and she sat up, pushed my head and said, "No; later, okay?"

I gave out a groan but then said, "ok" and then resumed to gently lick all around the rest.

There is nothing like this moment with her. Feeling her most tender and private parts and knowing that Robert was enjoying her just a little while earlier. I admit it is humbling to think of her having probably been writhing around beneath him, her breasts against his chest and his cock inside where my tongue only licks at the outside. I keep saying it but it turns me on like crazy to share that moment with her.

I guess I'm getting a bit used to the mild tang of his cum now, it almost seems to blend with her sweetness, but no sooner had I really gotten back into it that she sat up and said, "okay baby, that's enough. Later now, okay?" and she pulled my face upwards and kissed me. She still had her bra on as she stood up and changed the pad in her panties and said, "he feels so good in me".

It is a very weird feeling between her and me now that it is out in the open and what is happening between them. She isn't shy to share how she feels sexually with me (I guess I'm now like a girlfriend to her in that way) knowing that my wife is so sexual with another guy.

Anyway, she pushed me aside and got up to get dressed. She was just about to put on her top but instead she pulled me to her and said she loved me and kissed me deeply, and I do mean deeply and passionately, then said once again, "later, okay?"

I smiled and nodded and watched her pull on a t-shirt and pair of lounge pants to go back downstairs.

We went out for our meal (nothing special!) and came home and it's now past 10pm and there's no sign of anything happening yet. She's made googly eyes at times and such but we're still hanging in the den with the kids at 10:30pm when I start to say that I'm going to head up and head towards bed. Suzanna seems reluctant to follow but does and when we get in the bedroom she looks at me and says that she's pretty tired from a long day and a long week. She kissed me and then said, "besides, the weekend doesn't start till tomorrow..." and then a second later she looks at me with this sexy smile on her face and then as if it was just something totally normal she says, "beside, I want to enjoy him for one more night".

I was stunned but also turned on as all heck. She came up to me and hugged me and felt my hard-on pressing against her and said, "and just think how much you'll want me tomorrow?!". I kind of moaned and groaned and she did the whole 'come on baby, one more night won't matter speech' and then she kissed the back of my neck and whispered, "besides, doesn't it turn you on a little to wait?”

I mumbled something again about "...tomorrow..." and she said, "you can take all of your desires out on me then, I promise.....”

She stripped naked and then slowly pulled on a t-shirt; I know she did it to sort of torment me at that point. I'd like to say we talked more but it was well after 11pm and we'd had a glass of wine or two together and she'd had some earlier with Robert so I just sort of resigned to waiting till today. I climbed into bed next to her and spooned up behind her. She snuggled into me and as I held her tight and rubbed her shoulders and such she leaned back and said, "if you promise not to cum in me, you can put it in me for a bit".

I swear my cock nearly broke her hip at how hard it got right away. She giggled and reached between her legs as we spooned and she said, "just a little okay ... I guess you deserve it" and then she giggled as she felt how hard I was and said, "oh, you're so going to want me tomorrow, I can tell". With that she rubbed the tip against her wet hole and I slipped right in!

She groaned as I filled her and said, "easy, I told you to take it easy ..." and she pulled away from me. I nearly screamed out at how she felt when I first entered her. In that position, on her side, spooned, she was tighter than I'd imagined but, oh my god, how wet and soft and silky she felt! I immediately grabbed her hips and almost instinctively pulled her towards me. She felt so fucking good! I released her and pulled her back one more time even more deeply only this time when I released her she pulled away and off of me and said, "that's enough! Oh my god you feel so big." Before I could do anything she turned onto her back to face me. She kissed me and said, "can you wait till tomorrow?" and then a second later she added in her sweetest voice, "... please.”

I hadn't even noticed how wet my cock was as it lay against my thigh all I could think of was how she felt and how I now felt wanting her even more. I thought about saying no, I thought about jerking off, but the more I thought about it, well, I just kind of moaned and said, "okay".

She pulled me to her for a huge kiss that was almost as good as sex from how she moulded her whole body to mine and gently stroked my still hard and wet cock. As she let go of me she said, "I love you baby..." and then she added "... this is the most amazing thing we've ever done". She pulled down her t-shirt and said, "now can we go to sleep?"

With 2 layers of cloth between us and my cock still throbbing for release I spooned back up with her and she cooed that she loved me and I guess feeling her fall asleep next to me calmed me down.

'It's now 6pm and she's due back any moment and I've bought some champagne and some shrimp cocktails before we settle into a long night of fucking..... '

Last night surpassed anything either of us could have possibly imagined. I'm not even sure where to start.

When she came home it was about 6:30pm and she liked that I'd gotten champagne and a snack for us. We kissed and she motioned for me to follow her up to the bedroom. When I followed her in she turned and said, "you're still having to wait till later..... you almost jumped the gun last night" and giggled and came to me and kissed me and gently felt my rapidly swelling cock.

She said she wanted to change into something more sexy and said that I should listen to her for now. I was speechless, she had me glued to every word. To me she already looked so sexy.

"I want you to feel something..." I heard her say but it didn't register as I was just in awe of her. She pulled her pants down, pulled her panties out, took my hand and put my hand in, "Don't go in just play around the outside," she commanded.

I groaned as a reply but I moved my fingers downward further between her legs and it was wet. I heard her say, "Rub it around .... but don't go in" and I was so friggin' turned on if she'd have stroked my cock I'd have exploded already.

She closed her eyes and sighed, looked at me and said, "that's still from him you know".

I gulped and said, "yeah - I know" and with that she pulled my hand out of her panties and said, "okay - that's all for now .... let’s go eat and have that champagne, you know what that does for me".

She slid off her pants but left her panties on; she stood and pulled off her top but left her bra on and then pulled just a long t-shirt over her head. This took all of maybe 30 seconds for that to happen and I was just struck not believing this is her. It wasn't until she kissed me and said, "more later honey - mmmmm" and she walked out of the bedroom back towards the kitchen before I came out of my trance!

I ran after her and realized, she was right, the champagne and some food would only make us both even hornier than we both were. I could tell by the look in her eyes that she was horny for sure. We tried to keep to a normal conversation but by the end of the 2nd glass of champagne and most of the shrimp, I had her prone on the couch in the living room and was trying to reach behind her to unclip her bra. She pushed me off and said we should take the 3rd glass of champagne up to the bedroom. Then she kissed me and said I should give her 5 minutes alone before coming up.

She went upstairs and I watched that clock until it read 5 minutes (not a second more!)had gone by at which point I went up to the bedroom and opened the door. I found her lying on the bed in some new lingerie I'd never seen before. The top was a push-up style with a bit of a corset-like appearance; the panties were split in the middle and had lace covering her pussy beneath. She had on a sexy garter belt that was clipped at mid-thigh to some sheer stockings. She looked incredible.

I was practically drooling at the sight of her. "You like? I wore this last night with Robert". She spread her legs and pointed to the stains that were still on them. "I thought you'd like to have me in them too".

I can't begin to describe how it felt to see her in this new lingerie and know that I'm the second to see her in it. She spread her legs a little bit and said, "Well, do you like?”

I nearly ripped off my clothes and was down to my boxers in a flash. I lay down next to her and started to caress her through the tight-fitting top and lacy panties but she pushed my hands away and said that, "Mmmm, maybe we should talk a little first".

She was killing me and I was dying and knew I wasn't going to last and hoped she didn't want to have a long serious talk. Instead she started out by saying, "I loved making love with Robbie all week knowing it was driving you crazy waiting for me". I was leaning down towards her but she kept me at a distance and teased me, "did you like waiting for me?".

I was delirious with desire but knew I wanted to wait if she was in this kind of mood as I knew she was going to ratchet up the intensity. I told her that I loved waiting for her and she cajoled me to tell her more; I told her that I loved knowing she was fucking Robert.

She leaned up and kissed me and said, "he's having me more than you, you know....." and then said, "I love how he leaves me so fulfilled .... I love feeling him now even a day later." With that she spread her legs a little bit and fished her finger into her pussy, pulled it out and rubbed it on my lips and pulled me down for a kiss. Even 24 hours later I could still taste the tang of his cum in her. I swear my cock was throbbing as she seemed to want me to go slowly with her despite my true desire to slam into her.

"Mmmm ... he really does take good care of me ..... I can't believe it's been 2 weeks since you and me did it".

I told her that I was so horny waiting for her that I wanted her more and more as the time went by. She giggled and said, "I think he's had me like 10 times since you did .... I hope you like how I feel." Then she corrected herself, ".. how Robbie’s pussy' feels". Oh man, if I wasn't hard enough to cut diamonds already, I was then.

She kissed me and said, "I want to you to go down there and lick me ..." again adding, "... for now, just the outside, okay?” With that she raised her knees and spread them revealing her pussy and swollen pussy lips. I was totally turned on by how glistening and wet she looked!

I licked around the edge for a few minutes as she started to moan as I tongued at her stiff clit. I could taste more of their juices oozing out of her and she really moaned. I pushed it and put my tongue into her openness and she immediately held the back of my head, the moment had caught up to her and she moaned and she held me as I licked and probed.

A moment later she couldn't take it anymore and pulled my shoulders up to her and I knew it was finally my turn. She got up on her elbows and watched and giggled at my now huge cock bobbing away and she closed her eyes as I entered her for the first time in almost 14 days. She felt as hot and wet and open as she had on Friday night and I slid all the way in as she moaned deeply and pulled her knees back for me. As I bottomed out in her she shook as she came again under me. As she did her arms and legs wrapped around me and pulled me as deeply into her as I could go. It turned me on that her pussy felt gaping deep inside and I knew that Robert had been deeper than I was but it didn't matter at that moment it was just her and me on the verge of an even larger explosion together.

When I did finally push into her, knowing that she was mine again, wow, it felt amazing. What felt even better was feeling her cum almost as soon as she felt me deep in her. I know it felt amazing to feel that so effortlessly between us. I felt like my cock was deep in her and I know she felt awesome.

I remember it was one of those moments that I'll remember for a long time. Time seemed to move in slow-motion and I was wicked horny. I had a million thoughts in my head and somehow knowing Robert had been enjoying her for the past 2 weeks made me keep my focus.

Yes, she felt open; very open; erotically open if you ask me! Even when she tightened up on my cock, maybe it was in my head or maybe it's for real but her pussy felt just incredible, indescribable.

Is it crazy to love how her pussy felt like that? I openly admit that knowing her lover fucked her for 2 weeks straight and that he's the reason she felt so open, her pussy definitely felt relaxed. I know it's probably all in my head but does it matter, I am sure she felt wetter and, oh man, did she feel good? I'll admit knowing it's probably the remains and effects of his cum in her that was a huge turn-on!

She stopped me just after we got started on Saturday night. I fought off that first urge to fuck her hard till I came in her. I held still and felt her body underneath me and it just felt so beautiful. I started to thrust in her and she pushed me back and then, oh yeah, I felt she could still tighten it up.

I was kind of frantic as she pushed at my chest and held her legs tighter together. I was almost drooling at that point and I don't know how she managed to control herself but she said something like, "You get me for this weekend ... "then added, "... after this weekend I want to be his again".

I don't know how to describe what I felt at that moment, even now it's just a moment that surprised me, but I nodded yes and a second later she relaxed again and I slipped all the way into her again. She made a remark and said something about how wet she was feeling!

What I remember most was how again, almost effortlessly we got right back into groove with each other. I could tell she felt great about it and I know that feeling us moving so Freely, rolling around on the bed, her climbing up on top of me or me being behind her, that first night, it was totally what we both needed.

When I did finally put her on her back, and she knew that I needed to cum, and I knew that she wanted it as much as me. I pushed her legs back with my arms and she went right along and it could be that she was thinking about Robert but I also know that she came quite a lot several times until I finally reached my point. I felt like I exploded as I pumped it all in her.

Despite jerking off countless times, I swear it felt like I squirted a quart of cum in her. It felt scalding hot and, oh yeah, awesomely satisfying! Halfway through I felt her body tense up and I felt her orgasm continue past when mine ended and listened to her squeal as I pushed my softening cock in and out of her.

Did she tell me details about her and Robert? Yes, she shared some later as she roused me for seconds. (In truth, the rousing was mutual!)

She told me more as we enjoyed our last fuck. I asked her what positions he'd liked with her and she again said, "he likes being behind me .... he feels huge in me in that position". At other times she'd hiss at me mid-fuck and squeal how, "deep and hard he fucks me". Her teasing was very intense, even when we were having sex, she would tease me with just little snippets of their time together including her giggling about having to buy period-pads again, "... only for a different reason this time!”

It was really intense and it was leading up to our last fuck. Yes, our last fuck. She wanted to call it that. She said it on Saturday night, that after our last fuck on Monday, that she wanted to be his again. She said it again on Sunday and then, oh my god, did she play it up last night.

No, not our last fuck forever; we talked about it and she asked me what I wanted. I asked her honestly how she felt about the sex we'd had over this weekend and before she could answer me I told her that I felt it was incredible and that I loved how anxious and eager I was for her all weekend. I admitted that taking a break from each other for a few weeks was very arousing to me.

She kissed me and said she was scared I wasn't going to feel the same but she said she loved how she felt with me. She looked at me right in the eyes and said that she loved how she felt that first time on Saturday night and I told her I knew. Then she said to me that she could tell that when I finally came in her that first time she too could feel how much it meant to me and how deeply it connected us.

She told me she wanted to be exclusively with him again. Not in those words but she made it clear that she wanted to only fuck him again and she wanted me to tell her exactly how I felt about it and what it was I wanted. It wasn't threatening or mean-spirited, just the opposite, but she implored and then said something that struck me, she said, "tell me whatever you're comfortable telling me." She paused for a moment and then said, "this isn't easy for me but I think it is something that you feel more deeply than me in some ways".

She kissed me and said, "You know I'll always be here for you ..." and then giggled and said, "... even with your perverted brain....”

Before I could say anything she went on, "I want to be his sex toy for the summer. It may not be the big passionate affair I thought I wanted but I think it might be okay for us and I want to be sure for you". She leaned in and kissed me, said she loved me and then, "tell me what you think?”

I wanted her to talk more. I'd waited all weekend for this big conversation and now she'd turned the tables on me and she wanted me to lead.

I took a deep breath and a sip of my drink and I told her that I thought what she did for the past 2 weeks was amazing and that despite how crazy it sounded, that it had turned me on incredibly.

She smiled and said it'd done the same for her and then said, "so?"

I stumbled for words and told her that how she had been this past week had made it easier for me and despite having some of this in my head for so long, I wasn't sure how to say it to her.

I told her that as long as I felt I was a part of the fun she was having, that I wanted her to do it again. I said something like, "it's okay to give him your pussy" and oh my, did she smile!

Now it wasn't as though that was the first time I'd said yes but I suppose the other times were during foreplay or while we were fucking where in the heat of passion she'd probably said it and I'd agreed. This time we were talking openly and clearly and not in mid-thrust.

She cooed and sidled up next to me and whispered, "how long do you think?".

I said that I'd been thinking about it and that, if it worked for her, that I thought 2 weeks might be good again. I wasn't looking at her face but I could tell by her sigh-like response that wasn't necessarily what she was thinking I was going to say. I rolled over towards her pushing her onto her back and with me on my side I ran my hands up over her night-shirt up to her breasts and I said, "but if that goes okay then maybe we can try 3 weeks after that". Oh my, did that bring a smile back to her face!

I could see her counting the weeks as she thought about the timing and so I added, "... that'll take us up to the weekend before July 4th". I know as I said it that that my voice cracked a bit.

She picked up on that and said, "it's okay honey, we'll talk in 2 weeks and we'll see if we're both okay with it". I kissed her and said, "okay" and she eagerly kissed me back which I took to be an affirmative agreement.

It seemed so eerie agreeing to it just like that. As our kiss ended that was when she started up with the 'last fuck' thing. She said stuff about, "come on baby and enjoy me one last time" and at another point she started in about, "... only Robbie cumming in me" and then she looked at me and said, "you've made quite a mess in me yourself" and giggled.

She told me again how after last night that I'm, "only to lick the outside area" and how she, "wants to keep his stuff in me". Needless to say by the time we actually got into bed last night, my cock was throbbing.

Again, it was with the 'ast time baby' stuff and she was quite explicit, spreading herself open at one point and teasing me that, "only Robbie will get to enjoy this". I was beside myself by the time I got naked and climbed into bed with her.

I started to play along with her and it just felt right when I started to get into all her teasing. I said, "You like his big cock don't you?". That brought out a moan so I said other stuff like, "he'll keep you all wet for the next 2 weeks". It was when we started to go back and forth about how he fucks her that it seemed to hit the turbo-switch for me. She told me how she loves to cum when she's on top of him, how she loves to let her whole body weight bear down so he can be in her as far as he can be. I told her that her pussy felt great from being with him and she told me how he loves that she can take all of him.

Well, it surely didn't take me long to get close. The whole 'last fuck' thing was in my head, that was this again going to be the last time I got to feel her. She started pushing up at me with her pelvis and each time I pushed into her she'd push back against me. She moaned something about how, "he loves when I do that" and that was it, the thought of her sharing that moment with him just set me off.

Even though that was our 4th fuck in 3 days, and I mean 4 deep hugely draining fucks with her, this 'last time' in some ways was the most intense. I held off as much as I could until I heard something that triggered it and then, wow, I guess all the teasing did its job because she and I shared what I can only say was one of the best mutual orgasms ever experienced! At the end just before we came nearly together she said something like, "cum on baby, cum in me one last time". That was the thought that put me over.

We lay there together for a while. She didn't cough or move suddenly so even my softened cock stayed put inside her and we kissed passionately for must have been at least a few minutes (or it felt that way).

There was a definite sombre moment there between us. We both definitely knew we wanted to do this again but at the same time I knew we were sharing this intense moment. When our kiss ended it just seemed right. I pushed up on my elbows and then straightened my-arms. She looked up at me and just said, "ready?".

I looked down at her and said, "yes".

With that she said, "slow ... pull out slowly ... " and then she giggled "... one last time". I think I was shaking as I pulled my softened cock out of her. Shrivelled and glistening from our cum we both watched as my dripping cock slipped out of her pussy and dangled above it.

And with that, it was done. I had some weird feelings at that moment seeing my cock dangling there and knowing I wouldn't get to have her again for 2 more weeks now, well, almost 2 weeks. (We agreed that we'll 'reconvene' on the weekend of June 8th.) She pulled me down to her once my cock was free and kissed me and said she loved me. I'd just cum like a fire-hose but as she hugged me and I thought of now not having her, I swear I could feel my cock starting to throb again.

We lay there for a moment until she kissed my forehead and then rolled off of the bed and still naked went into the bathroom. I assumed she'd be bringing me back a washcloth when she was done. I lay there for a few minutes listening to the faucet running but then when she didn't re-appear I got up myself and opened the bathroom door. There she was, sitting on the toilet and, yes, cleaning my cum out of her pussy!

She looked up at me and said, "sorry, you weren't supposed to come in" but she didn't stop and she squeezed the last of the water from the washcloth into her pussy where it all flooded out of into the toilet. I watched for a second and then reached for another washcloth and turned and left her to some privacy.

She came back to bed a few minutes later and hugged me and said something about, "sorry, I just like to be clean like that when I'm going to be with him".

I moaned back, "it's okay" but I know I also felt my cock start to throb again too.


Today is Tuesday and the beginning of my next 2 week trial-denial period and I'm horny as heck and can surely say I want this.

She's seeing him today and, after the past few days, that's okay and I'm ready for it. She says she wants to see him on Thursday and, for the first time, she asked if she could see him on Saturday. She said it's so that it would be every other day and, "make up for yesterday."

I reminded her what we said about pushing things in general. She just giggled and said she'd be careful.


I'm actually kind of excited about it right now. I know the novelty will probably wear off but, then again, it's been years since she started sleeping with other guys and that novelty has never worn off; if anything it's gotten stronger!

Maybe she's right, maybe right now, this is good for us. I don't know but I know that this past weekend, wow, there was a marked closeness between us that I think even surpasses some of the recent times we'd had together; almost as if because we had 'just this one weekend' that we packed as much into it as possible. In a way I guess this is what it'd be like if this were a long-distance relationship in a way, that we'd have our time together focused on each other’s pleasure knowing that we'll have time where we cannot or, rather, will not.

When she got ready this morning from coming out of the shower naked and standing by the sink for a while primping whatever that I just looked at her body and I just loved what we are doing! That she lets me look but she'd rather not have me touching! As I looked at her my cock did get hard once again knowing that her afternoon/early-evening will be spent again with Robert and his big cock imbedded in her.


She told me, "you had me all weekend ... and I don't want any more attention 'down there' tonight". She smiled at me and said that if I was feeling horny I should 'go take some time in the den' before bed if I wanted. She kissed me and smiled that knowing smile again.

I know I wanted this but my feelings were off the scale when she eventually came home and we sat down to dinner. I kissed her and all she said was that she was starving. We made idle talk all through dinner with no mention of the 1000 pound pink elephant in the room but when I went to the bathroom I did find a used and very wet period-pad in the trash!

She's on the phone with her sister right now so I have some time and can give my cock time to deflate. I already have visions in my head for later before bed. It seems weird to say it but during this denial period masturbation seems to take on a new sense of excitement that I haven't felt in a long time. I remember when I was younger, between girlfriends, I used to jerk-off several times a day when there'd be a long time between getting laid. Now I'm having those same feelings again, like I can just keep on cumming at times and each one just feels so much more intense when my head and hands realize it isn't just a fantasy.

It's such a different start this time than last time.


She was teasing me as she shooed me out of the bedroom that, "Robbie had waited all weekend for me". She shared earlier that he'd asked her whether she and I had sex this past weekend. She said that we had and that he seemed happy about that and that he then joked with her, "that should do it for him for another few weeks...."

Little does he know!


Yesterday was Wednesday and despite my fun on Tuesday night Suzanna was still interested in continuing our Wednesday ritual. She knew I'd relieved myself on Tuesday so she said she knew last night wouldn't be as intense as others have been.

As always, it was our time to talk. She started out by thanking me for being so understanding about how she'd felt on Tuesday; that she wanted to be 'left alone' and not have to let me share with her. She hugged me and said that knowing I felt like that and was okay with what she'd wanted, that it really let her relax about it. She said, "I'm really starting to enjoy what's going on between us as well as with Robbie". She said that my accepting of the situation is 'really wonderful' and she thanked me several times. She was getting changed, or rather undressed, as she was finishing that thought and turned to me as she stood there naked and said, "I like being with him, he makes me feel wonderful".

I got up from the bed and put my arms around her and pulled her to me and said, "I love you". I sat at the end of the bed just a few feet from her as she let me see all of her for a moment longer before she giggled and called me 'crazy' and turned to pull on her night-shirt. I replied, "Yeah, crazy about you" as I slid back on the bed towards the pillows.

She walked to my side of the bed and said, "... these won't do ..." and she pulled down my boxers and when my stiffening cock came into view she said, "there, that's better". As she crawled into bed next to me she giggled and said, "just because I don't want it in me doesn't mean I don't like seeing it".

I won't say she teased me, at least not directly, but she did talk to me about pretty much everything. At one point she said what I've said for a while now, that Wednesday's have become our, essentially, 'open mic' night where anything goes.

We talked about a lot of stuff. She asked me how I'd feel if she were to tell me she'd fallen in love with Robert. I was surprised that she'd just come out and said that but she did.

I gulped and struggled to find the words but I told her that I knew it was something that she would eventually feel for him and that if and when it happens that I did want her to tell me. I took that opportunity to tell her again that I wanted and hoped she would share this sort of stuff with me and that I did want to hear about all of her relationship with Robert and not just the in-bed parts.

She giggled and said, "okay, I'll start to share more of that" then she laughed a bit louder and said, "there was none of that last night" (referring to Tuesday) and said that they'd not really talked that much and then she gave me that sexy laugh that said, "He wasn't much into talking, he really wanted me.....”

I moaned at that reply and she too gave an appreciative 'hmmm' when she saw that my cock had now grown to full-hardness. She teased me as she moved around on the bed and patted her pussy saying, "it turns me on that only Robbie has me now". She looked at me, "it's such an amazing feeling; it turns me on so much to think about it ..." and then a second later she giggled and said, "... you only have yourself to blame!"

I told her that it turned me on to think about too and that I have given up trying to figure out the reasons why. She smiled and leaned forward and kissed me and said, "I feel the same". She leaned back, "it's so weird, but it turns me on to think about it; me, being turned on by not having sex with you?" as if she was surprised even at herself.

She cooed as she moved around on the bed that, "it turns me on that you don't cum in me right now". I groaned back that it did the same for me. I looked up at her and said that I thought it had all led to an incredible weekend for us. She giggled and said, "yeah, you sure were a horny one weren't you? .... but then so was I ... and yes, it was wonderful for us, wasn't it?”

Even her calm talk like that was turning me on and all the while I was stroking away. She again told me, "your cock looks huge these days ... almost as thick as Robbie's," then she did giggle, "... but he's longer than you ... at least an inch or so longer."

I groaned at that and told her that it turned me on to think about. She again gave that sexy sigh and said that she thought that hearing that might bother me. I told her that it didn't, that it actually turned me on.

She thought it might bother me that he was, "in me farther than you are" and I told her that I knew she'd been with other guys including a few who she'd already told me were longer than me. She smiled and said she was surprised that I'd remembered all of that and then giggled whether I remembered her on BF who 'used to do my ass'. I moaned and told her that I'd never forgotten him and even feigned cursing him that he had such a skinny cock!

She laughed at that and all of a sudden she reached over and grabbed a tissue. I moaned at her sudden movement and turned to look at her and as she turned back saw a wicked looking smile on her face. She turned to me and said, "see, this is what happens after I'm with him .... " and with that she spread her legs a little bit, "... baby... he cums so much in me that I'm wet for days afterwards".

My eyes opened wide and she let me see her pussy spread apart and sure enough, she was seeping cum and I could see that her pussy was still a bit swollen. As she went to blot and wipe herself she stopped and sat there with her legs apart, "I told you he had waited all weekend to see me; I guess I didn't tell you a lot yesterday, sorry....”

What she shared wasn't so much a blow-by-blow (or thrust by thrust) account of her night but rather more of a description of how she felt and what she wanted to feel.

We were lying next to each other and sort of talking-at-the-ceiling but holding hands or her caressing my side, etc. She can obviously feel me stroking away. At first she seemed reluctant to tell me that after the long weekend we'd enjoyed together that she was eager to see him but once she saw that I was happy about it she continued.

I could tell she felt a little awkward at first so I started and said, "tell me about it".

She told it to me almost like a Penthouse Letter story. She said she'd gotten to his place before 4pm and that she'd been surprised that he had a fire lit in the fireplace. (No big deal, I thought; it's a gas fireplace but it obviously impressed Suzanna!). She said that he'd had a bottle of wine open and waiting for her. It took me a minute to remember that it was rainy and ugly out on Tuesday compared with how beautiful Wednesday was.

She started to tell me how they kissed and how warm she felt all over when she looked at me and said, "Are you sure you really want to hear all of this?" I motioned with my chin towards my stiff cock and she giggled and said she'd try to think of me as a girlfriend as she talked.

She told me how he ran his hands through her hair and how he seemed to make her seem like she was the most important person in the world. I did cringe a little when she told me how his hands felt her whole body as they stood there kissing.

They shared some wine and he seemed focused on her, hugging her and massaging her shoulders at times. She sounded hesitant when she got to where she told me about him stretching her out on the couch and him kneeling next to her even though we both knew where that was heading.

It's weird but even now sometimes I get the chills thinking about her being seduced. She said as she lay there and they kissed more that he seemed so comfortable unbuttoning her top and revealing her body. The way she told it, it seemed totally natural and easy for her to let herself go with him. She told me how she felt her nipples hardening and her pussy get wet as she relaxed and let herself be seduced.

"I lifted up so he could undo my bra..... It feels so good when he gently sucks on my breasts". When I heard her say that, that she felt comfortable sharing this with me, I could feel the churning starting inside as my hand was doing its job.

She told me how he took her top off but left her in her pants and panties and how she could feel his shirt against her chest and then how she felt his hands and then mouth. All the while, my hand was moving faster and faster. She unbuttoned his shirt next and commented on how similar he looks to me with nice muscles and just the right amount of hair and how she felt warm all over when he hugged her bare-skin to bare-skin.

My angst rose again when she told me how he kissed his way down her naked body to her waist and how she felt herself trembling as she felt his hot breath and then his hands at the button of her pants. I felt myself get a lot closer to bursting as she told me how she felt a gush in her pussy as she felt him unbutton her pants and slide them down. She emphasized that he was a gentleman and did not pull down her panties and that made her feel wonderful. He let her lift her butt enough to let him take them down and then she emphasized how she spread her legs with her panties still on and realized that he could probably see how wet her panties were.

"I felt my first cum start when I felt his hand go into my panties" and she said that she felt herself almost unconsciously thrust her pelvis upward to force herself on him. She described how gently he teased her until she had to almost beg him to take her panties off.

I swear I could feel pre-cum dribbling out of my cock as I stroked and next she told me how she loved the feeling of her panties coming off of her ankles and how free she felt with him, "I felt his wet fingers touching me and I started to shake as he teased my 'little nub' (as she calls it)".

He was still kneeling next to her and she said that she suddenly felt the intense need to have him naked next to her ; how while he teased her pussy (emphasizing that he didn't push his fingers into her at all, something I know she loves, being teased like that) that she managed to turn to her side and she started to undo his pants. I could hear the urgency in her voice as she told me how she struggled with his belt and how he then helped and unbuttoned his pants.

She said that wanting to see him she got up on her elbow and looked as he pushed his pants down and how she wasn't disappointed when his 'log', as she called it, popped out. Her eyes were closed as she told me she reached out and how hot it felt in her hand.

I actually think she may have forgotten she was talking to me as she just seemed to be talking.

She looked over at me and described how she tugged him and signalled him that she wanted to suck him adding, "I can only take a few inches of him, kind of like you....".

Damn that got me even harder and hornier to visualise, thinking of her doing that to me and thinking that because she's been sucking him lately that she seems like she can take a lot more of me orally than she used to be able!

She said as she began to really suck him, that was when she felt him pay attention to her pussy and, "I felt his hand move and he put his fingers in me..... oh my god". For a moment she seemed to be lost in the memory but a second later she said quietly, "that was the first time I came with him".

The way she said it, 'Girlfriend-to-Girlfriend', I knew I was going to be having one intense cum myself pretty soon. She seemed to dwell on how she felt; she said all she could feel was 'him', with one hand on her breast, his cock in her mouth and now his fingers in her pussy and how she felt herself clench as she came on his fingers. From how she said it, it was a beautiful moment for her and, yes okay, it did give me a bit of a melancholy feel to think about her cumming on her lovers fingers like that. No matter, the thought of it was also intensely exciting especially as she told me about how she could feel how wet her climax had made her and how she knew he could feel it too.

At this point I truly think she'd forgotten about me because she lay there and just seemed to get into recalling things. "When he felt I was all slippery he asked me if I was ready and I told him, 'yes, but go slowly'".

For the next few moments, in the darkened room, I heard her tell me how it felt for her lover to penetrate her. She told me how she felt his wet fingers spread her pussy lips apart and then how he'd rub the tip of his cock all around her 'wet hole' as she called it.

I felt the first tightening of my own approaching cum as she told me how she felt when he started to enter her; how gentle he was and how full it made her feel; how he stopped with just the tip in her and how he said how hot she felt!

She seemed to not care when she said it was the moment she moaned to him how she loved him. I know it's an expression of how she feels at that moment, we've been through that many times, but at the same time, it's was surreal to hear her say it and know that at that moment, she does genuinely love him and, more so, love that he's about to fuck her.

She told me how hard and big his cock felt as she took it in her hand and held him back from going in any further. I could hear the excitement in her voice as she told me all of this and I could only imagine how she must have felt in person. She told me how he moaned when he felt her holding him back; I know, she's done it to me many times in play and I know how frantic I get when she does it.

"He felt so big, I had to tell him again to go slowly" and she then told me how she took her hand off and she felt him gently and slowly push his way into her. When she told me how she could feel her pussy tremble, clench down and then release and how each time she felt wetter and wetter, damn, my hand was going crazy.

It was how she described feeling her pussy be filled by his cock that got to me. She told me how she could feel him going deeper and deeper in her until she could start to feel his pubes tickling hers. The thought of her pussy slowly being filled by his cock consumed my mind.

What struck me was hearing her share the tenderness and the emotion of the moment. How she 'pulled her legs back to make room for him' and how he hugged her deeply as they were connected in the most intimate manner. She said she could sense herself getting wetter and wetter as she felt his cock throb deep inside her. She must have remembered about me because she added, "... the same way sometimes I can feel you in me". Hearing her say that made me tremble and inch even closer to my own orgasm.

I knew what I was going to hear next and I wanted to hear it. She told me how he soon took control of her legs and how he spread them further and how she loved him looking down at her as she gave herself to him. She told me how she felt him thrust deeper and deeper into her and how she felt herself start to cum. She seemed to come out of her almost trance-like recap of things to tell me how she loved to think of him cumming in her and how she knew it was coming. I heard her tell me how he pushed all the way into her and how he'd grind himself against her mound which drove her even more crazy.

Hearing her tell me how she felt herself lose control as he started to fuck her harder and deeper right there on his couch really pushed me close. I knew what I wanted to hear and so did she but I took my hand off my cock so that I could prolong the 'agony' of hearing. I think she teased me in dragging it out a bit, she seemed to emphasize how wonderful she felt as she felt him 'taking me' and eventually she mentioned the feeling she knew well. It was erotic hearing how she 'knows' how he feels when he is close to orgasm just as she knows how I feel, "I could tell he was getting close .... mmm, and how I wanted to feel it".

A moment later she told me how she felt his thrusting get more and more frantic pushing into her wetness. She told me how she arched her back as he pushed into her the last few times and how she felt her toes clench up as she felt an intense orgasm wash over her. "I knew he was about to cum and that made me go off ....mmm, and then I felt it". She told me how she felt him thrust deep in her and as he held still how she could actually feel 'each time he squirted' and how they both seemed to come down at the same time.

As she told me how she could feel the heat of his orgasm in her, my hand had resumed its stroking of my cock and I let loose myself and proceeded to squirt my own load of cum all over my chest.....


This is the first weekend where she'll be with Robert. She's 'made up' plans and told the kids that she's going to go and meet an old college roommate tonight who is nearby visiting. As the day is going by it is sinking in further that she won't be home till late tonight and, even then, I will forego enjoying her body when she returns.

She did see Robert on Thursday too. She's admitted and told me many times now, knowing it turns me on, that she loves feeling like 'she is his'. She says that afterwards when she masturbates or just 'feels around down there' that she loves feeling herself still wet from him. I've seen her in bed several times suddenly reach for a tissue and I know that from the motion beneath the blanket that is obviously her wiping herself up a bit.

I do think she most definitely lusts after him and although that actually makes me feel a bit better to think of it as an arousal for me, I don't know that I'm truly ready to hear her tell me she is in love with him.

Suzanna has promised me that she'll 'take care of me' this weekend. I don't know exactly what she has in mind but if it alleviate my needs more than just masturbating, then if it were something she truly wants to do, depending on mood and circumstances, I might go along with the request to wait longer for her. It seems, in the short-term, that while masturbating is very satisfying mentally and physically, I still feel the need for a deeper more meaningful release. Her sucking me off definitely gives me that so if she is comfortable with giving me blowjobs then who knows how long I could possibly wait.

Up to now, blow-jobs are more of a surprise and exception than a norm. I've also even thought that if she would perhaps let me have her anally that I also would perhaps feel better about waiting longer for her pussy but then I think that wouldn't be what she'd want as she seems to truly enjoy having her sexual pleasure from just him for this time.

Regarding frequency, this is also something she's been quite candid about and has said that she definitely wants to see him, "as much as I can if it's okay with you". She recognizes that every day is probably just a dream although she has referred somewhat fondly back to when she reminded me that Dan met her almost every day for a while. She's said that if the every other day thing works for us, as in her and me, then that's what she'd like to do. We have already agreed that weekends aren't good as they arouse too many questions between ****** and friends/neighbours, etc. So the plan of 'meeting with an old school friend' isn't going to be something we shall be doing too often.

For the summer, our ******** has been wrangling with her friend to go spend a week or two up in Maine at a vacation cabin that the friends ****** has. We may have to shuttle her one way but she is working on that. The first thing Suzanna said to me after she heard about this arrangement was to suggest, "that might be when I could stay with Robbie?". So that too is a possibility.

I do know that Suzanna wants to do that; she's said to me several times that she wishes she didn't have to get up and leave after being with him but she's also mentioned that he is very nervous and hesitant about letting her stay over. I'm thinking perhaps there is much still to develop regarding this.


Regarding our marital bed, since he doesn't know that I know what is really going on, there needs to remain a bit of secrecy here. Suzanna has not mentioned having him ever come to our house but now, looking back at how it was when she shared our bed with her lovers in the past, I think I've moved well beyond feeling emotional or forlorn about that. I do sometimes think about what she did in our bed with other lovers in the past as excellent mental stimulation when I am having 'me time' but, as I've said, I don't think it'll happen with Robert given he'd be uncomfortable about spending the night.


She’s just left to go see him. It's hard to describe my feelings as I watched her get cleaned up and dressed nicely after we'd both been working around the house and yard this afternoon. I had my shower and before getting dressed I sat on the bed and watched her stand in front of the sink naked doing her hair after her shower. I think pride is really the word to describe what I was feeling about her getting ready to go over his place.

What she's telling me about how concerned he is about our relationship, Suzanna and me, gives me a good feeling about it all. (Crazily, other than exaggerating about the health issues, I guess it's true that I only get to fuck her every few weeks but then, isn't this the norm for some couples, only once or twice every few weeks.) All I can say is that seeing her standing there, knowing she's going to be so intimate with another man, it gives me just an amazing feeling to let her go like this. It makes me realize that I love her for more than just the sex we've had but I also realize that it's kind of a weird thing to feel.

She didn't take any sexy lingerie with her this time and I joked with her about putting nice stuff on top and not having the sexy stuff on underneath. She giggled and said something like, "yeah, it doesn't stay on long anyway" as if it were nothing at all, almost like she's telling me the weather. She came up to me and cupped my cock and said that if I waited till she came home that she'd do something nice for me, then gave me a passionate kiss and said she loved me, "... but right now, I'm off to my lover for some good sex".

She put on a nice pair of dressy shorts and a light top that was just as dressy but also sexy. We both went downstairs and our ******** gave her the thumbs-up approval and we both told her to have a good time with 'her friend'. Weird to think that at the moment that we were both saying it for the same reason!

Suzanna kissed me as I walked her out to the car and said that she thought she'd be home by about 1am. The thought of them having maybe 4+ hours together made me smile. She again said I should wait for her and smiled as she closed the car door.

I went into the garage afterwards to let my hard-on fade a bit before going back into the house to join my ********


She probably will come home quite tired and probably too tired to tend to my desires. For now I'm holding steady hoping for an early or energetic time when she gets home but I suspect the later it gets the more my mind will be giving me visions of what is going on and that will fuel my need to take care of myself.

I know it sounds crazy but I love the thought of what she's doing and the intensity of it; that she is no doubt wrapped deep in his arms right now makes my cock throb like nothing else I've ever felt. The thought of feeling her return to my arms later knowing where she's been and what lies beneath her night-shirt and wet panties, that is the ultimate fantasy for me right now. I can almost feel the pre-cum drooling out of my cock as I type this.

We're about to start a movie, my ******** and me. She's preparing the popcorn....


It’s almost midnight and I'm totally wired waiting for her. I thought I'd be tired but nope, not me and not my cock, that's for sure!

I know she's told him our made-up story that for health-related reasons sex is infrequent between us and that she's told him that I know she has a lover but that is as far as it's gone. Perhaps if he thought I wasn't going to be at home, he'd be might be receptive to the idea of coming to our house. I don't think she's yet told him that I would tolerate it .... let alone enjoy it! As I said, I suppose if I wasn't here, that it could happen but I just get the feeling from what she says about him, that he's very respectful of our marriage and wouldn't want to push it.

My ******** went off to bed and I have been watching some TV trying to take my mind off what she is undoubtedly doing right now, sharing herself with her lover. I tried very hard but I decided, what the heck, I might as well enjoy a little 'me-time' but I am riding the edge of it hopefully until she gets home. It is a weird feeling to be aroused by not having sex with her and yet, there it is.


I waited up till nearly 1am for her to get home but I must have dozed off because she woke me up when she came in about 1:30am. She was relieved and happy that I'd fallen asleep and said that she hoped that meant I would wait till Sunday for anything between us.

I was pretty tired; I guess working out in the yard in the heat had taken its toll on me but I was awake enough when a few minutes later I felt her climb into bed with me and I could smell not only her familiar perfume but, yes, I could also smell sex on her. It did turn me on a bit but when she got into bed and cuddled up with me and said, "It's good that you're tired so you can wait till tomorrow, right?" and she hugged and kissed my neck as she snuggled under the covers. I could have been persuaded to wake up and get all frisky but at that moment, feeling her next to me was really all I needed to fall back to sleep. As I slipped back toward slumber I asked, "are you okay, did you have a nice time?"

Her response was a soft sigh and, "yeah, mmm, very nice .... tell you tomorrow.”


yesterday morning I was horny when I woke up and I rolled over and woke Suzanna up with some kisses. It was already 9:30am but she said she was still tired and wanted 'a few more minutes'.

I lay back and wondered what the day would bring as I could feel I was already horny. I was just mellowing out when I heard Suzanna moan and say something like, "oh.... wow...." and a second later she slid out of bed and went into the bathroom. When she came back a moment later she said, "uh oh - I think I may have made a mess" and she pulled back the blankets on her side of the bed and there was a wet-spot underneath where she'd been sleeping.

I realized as she stood there next to the bed that she just had her night-shirt on and had stripped off the rest of her clothes, including her panties, before she climbed back into bed. She saw me looking and she had this look on her face, one of surprise but also of a 'told you so' kind of attitude, and she said, "sorry". As she turned away to go back to the bathroom she said, "... I told you he cums a lot".

She went again into the bathroom and I saw her reach for a bunch of toilet-tissue and again blot away at her pussy. She saw me looking at her and said, "oh, did you want to help with this?” A moment later she came back to the bed, spread out a hand-towel over the 5-6 inch wet spot on her side of the bed and she lay herself down on it. She turned to me and said, "... but only if you want to" and just like that she spread her legs and offered her pussy to me. As I knelt down between her legs she admonished me, "Remember, just the outside baby, okay?”

So mid-morning I found myself face to face with her adulterous pussy! She smelled nice, not overpowering, not bad but definitely, nice, she smelled like sex! If anything it brought back memories of 'sticky fingers' at how they'd smell after I'd finger-fucked her and made her cum in the past. As I leaned in I could feel my now very stiff cock and I almost unconsciously started to stroke it as I played with her pussy with my free-hand. She was still tired it seemed and she was happy just lying there letting me explore. Her pussy lips were sort of stuck together and appeared sticky as I spread them apart. I cannot tell you how turned on I was being that close to her pussy as I spread it apart to reveal everything. Her little nub at the top wasn't fully visible just yet and I actually wondered if she wanted me to bring her to orgasm or if she just wanted me to gently caress her pussy with my tongue. As I leaned in and started running my tongue up and down the sides of her pussy on the inside and then the outside of her labia she started to moan. She leaned up on her elbows and said, "take it easy down there" and from how she sounded, I knew she didn't want me to make her cum.

As I started to lick at her I actually felt her pussy spasm a little bit which caused her to reach down and push my head away. She almost growled and said, "I said just the outside, okay? Leave what's in me inside, okay?" but I couldn't help myself and as I licked at her now stiffening clit she pulled me up from her and said, "okay, that's enough for now". She pulled me into a kiss and I knew she could taste his cum on my lips and I felt her tongue lick across them. She could also feel my hard cock poking at her side and she put her hand on it and said, "would you like some help with this?”

I moaned back a, "yes please" and she giggled and said, "well, since I don't want you in me, let me see what I can do for you".

She slid down the bed and for the first time in a while she knelt between my legs and started to masturbate me. She looked up at me and smiled as she used one and then both hands. By this time our room was filled with sunlight and she looked beautiful kneeling before me with her hair looking like she'd just woken up after a night of sex (which was true!) and as I looked down at her she leaned forward and started to suck at the tip of my cock as she stroked me. Slowly she started to suck more and more of my cock into her mouth and her motions were perfectly synchronized with her mouth and her hands stroking the lower part of my cock that she couldn't get in her mouth.

I was really enjoying it; it'd been a long time since I'd had a 'good morning blowjob' and as she started getting into it more and more she took her mouth off at one point and said to me, "you can help too; it's okay if you push and want to fuck my face a bit".

With that she sucked my cock back into her mouth I started to push at her as she'd be sucking me in and then pull back as she would pull away. She still can't deep-throat me or anything like that but with her hands moving in unison with her mouth, damn, it felt good. As I lay there thrusting upwards into her mouth it reminded me of exactly what I'd been thinking about the other day, that jerking off was one thing but feeling her mouth or her pussy drawing out my cum is just so much more a satisfying release for me.

So here she was slurping away at my cock and me really getting into it. I wished she'd have been kneeling next to me so I could have played with her pussy some more but instead I just closed my eyes and let my mind wander. Of the million different horny thoughts swirling through my head I seized on the one where I imagined how she must have looked riding on top of him the night before, the position I guessed she was in when he did cum in her. The thought of him buried deep in her as he finally came and how maybe a ring of frothy wetness would appear around his cock, well, it all pushed me onward.

I didn't even think about it when I put one hand on the back of her head until she moaned in response and then, whatever she did, maybe opened her mouth a bit more or moved her tongue around or whatever, I suddenly knew I wasn't going to last much longer. I started pumping in and out of her mouth and she knew it too.

I so hoped she'd suck me off totally and wouldn't pull away and just stroke me to finish. I wasn't disappointed as when she felt the moment approach she sucked me more deeply in instead of pulling away. In an instant I let out a grunt and flooded her mouth! I felt her fingers still stroking me gently as she held the tip of my cock in her mouth and then she did what I love, she ran her thumb all the way up from way down low all the way to the tip of my cock to draw out the last of my cum.

I was still catching my breath lying there when she moved and before I could realize what she was doing - she was kissing me - snowballing with me. My cum tasted a bit acrid and tart - maybe from waiting for so long for her - but nonetheless, our tongues darted together as we shared a passionate kiss. She passed my whole load (or what was left) to me and I knew she wanted me to swallow it which I didn't mind at all. She giggled as our snowball kiss ended and then she sat back up.


After her rousing blow-job on Sunday morning before we even got out of bed, the rest of the morning was just sort of a blur and it wasn't until the afternoon that we had some time to talk.

She started out by basically asking me, "Are you ever going to get used to me fucking Robbie?”

I didn't know what she meant exactly so she came from a different direction and said she wanted to know if I thought I was ever going to essentially grow-out of being so consumed by her and Robert having sex. She asked me if we were ever going to get to a point where it wouldn't be that big a deal and where I wouldn't find myself so aroused that I would always want to have her or somehow share with her or go down on her after each time she's been with him.

In talking about it she said that she liked that it turned me on but that she wanted to know if this was going to be something I'll always want or if, as she'd said, "That you might get used to it.

I told her that I wasn't sure and that, as of now with her increased frequency with him, it was on my mind almost all the time.

She giggled and said she could understand that but then she said, "do you think it'll be the same a month from now?”

I was kind of struck by what she was asking as often I don't think too far into the future and it soon became clear that she was talking about our time coming up to the July 4th week. I went quiet while I thought about it and that was long enough to cause her to come to me and give me a hug and to say, "Aw honey, if you still want to share that much, I'll be okay with it ..." and then she added something to the effect of, "... but I thought by then maybe you'd be more used to it" before she kissed me.

It seemed weird to be talking to her like this but then again, I guess I have gotten used to her fucking someone else, like Ray or even Dan, and at times it seems almost like our normal way of being instead of something special or out of the ordinary but truth is, she does fuck him a lot. At times it surprises me how eager she is for him all the time and, as she says, she doesn't get tired of fucking him? Lust or whatever, I know from how she is with me that she's certainly not tired of fucking him yet.

I started to say that I hadn't thought that far off into the distance yet when she moved closer to me and said, "it still turns you on that we're not doing it, doesn't it?" It was as if again she needed that reassurance.

I turned to her and said, "yes baby, it does. I still can't explain it but..." and before I could say more she kissed me and said, "it does for me too .... so .... let’s enjoy it - right?" or something very close to that.

I was honest and told her that I jerk-off a lot thinking about her. She said, "that's good, I know you seem happy ..." and giggled something about, "... enjoying that this morning". We both sort of said the same thing at the same time, that for whatever reason, we both seem to be turned on by everything right now. She smiled and kissed me hearing us say something like that almost at the same time. She said she loved me and that for a weird as it sounds, she said she feels closer to me now that we're not doing it as often.

She asked me again, whether I was, "ever going to get used to me sharing this" pointing to her pussy. I groaned an initial response and then said that I thought maybe I would but then I threw it back on her that she seems to always have something 'new' to share with me. That made us both laugh which sort of broke the ice on what had become a sombre mood.

She said that she hasn't felt so good with another guy since Peter. I'll say that it was sobering to hear her speak so openly and that some of my giddiness from the laughing faded as she talked. She said again to me how she feels wanted and it really made me warm all over to hear her say how wonderful that feels. She joked, "I know you want me all the time but it feels incredible to be wanted by another, a younger guy, and how good it feels to fulfil his desire!". She then said, "sometimes, I'd like to just enjoy him ..." hesitated and then added, "... and that I'd rather you waited to have fun with me".

I hugged her and said that as long as she was honest and open with me, that I'd accept that as 'part of all of this' and added, "provided that I do get to have fun with you sometimes".

She giggled and said, "I promise!”


She is seeing him tonight. As I may have posted before, she used to put some lingerie together to put in a bag to take to his place but now she rarely does so. She's already said that it never stays on her for long and, as she knows it turns me on to know that she has definitely reached the point where she is both comfortable and wants to be naked when she's with him. I knew this time was approaching from how she's sounded each time she's come home and, yes, it is another step further up on the intimacy/emotional ladder.

It is weird not knowing or having ever seen Robert and to know that Suzanna is very intimate with him. I liken it to the feelings I got when other guys looked at her when we're at the nude beach. When I think of her lying on his bed with maybe just a sheet draped over her (or maybe not!) I'm so proud that she's my wife and when she tells me that she feels so comfortable lying there, so explicitly after they've had sex, sharing her body with him like that, I know I've taken yet another step on that ladder.


Suzanna's been asking me to take a day off to head down to the nude beach already. Even though it's only early-June it's already making lying in the sun at the beach a possibility and now I'm thinking that's going to be smack in the middle of the 3-week period leading up to the July 4th week. The very idea triggered the thought in my head that this is going to be definitely a new experience, to be at the nudie beach with her and at the same time being denied fucking her! Its making me a bit horny to think about right now.


I asked her yesterday whether Robert doesn't want more or something else from her? I can't remember how I asked her exactly, I know it came up when she said that this Friday that they both were again going to join the after-work crew for a while 'to keep up appearances' and that their plan is for him to leave early and for her to stay around a little later and to then go to his place afterwards. She asked me if I was okay with that and I said I was fine just as long as they're careful around work-related stuff.

I suppose maybe it is becoming a bit more of a norm for her to be with him. After yesterday and feeling close to her as I did, I'm quite calm about her seeing him this afternoon. I know I'll enjoy hearing about it when she gets home. It'll be interesting to see how I feel about trying to not want her as much as I know I will and to leave her be until later tonight, if even then. If she weren't so damn sexy at times, it might be easier but I'm sure it's mostly in my head thinking about her that makes me constantly horny.


In her infatuation with Robert it seems to me that she's most focused on having just him cumming in her. I'm thinking there may be a hormonal influence going on over time that could be deepening her attraction with him. I do not believe that she necessarily doesn't want me to fuck her, evidence of that was over Memorial Day weekend where she wanted me as much as possible.

If I were to venture a guess, it will be that she'll want July 4th week to be just for us as we'll be on vacation and probably going away for a few days. However, I'm going to also say that after that I'm fairly sure she's going to want another denial-period. Based on what I've seen, felt and heard from her, that she will 'want me' again sometime in August which will line up with our intended vacation schedules.

If it were an ideal-fantasy world for her I'm thinking that perhaps she'd want to forego sex with me for an extended period of time. If next weekend and then our July 4th week works out I would say that perhaps she would want to try for the rest of the summer.

Having said that I know how concerned and then how relieved she was after we were able to reconnect so deeply over Memorial Day. Perhaps if she feels the same this coming weekend and into July 4th and our 'reconnecting' is as good as she needs it to be , perhaps she might ask to deny me for the rest of the summer.

I do love that she has this need to reconnect with me. At first I thought I was the only one needing that but, it's as I've said, she still needs reassurance both from me verbally in supporting her desires and also from me physically.


I've been pushing her to let me take some more sexy pictures of her. I told her she looks so lovely and all aglow at times that I would love to have pictures of her like that. She giggled and said that Robert has also asked her if he could have one.

I thought of saying, "why don't we ask Ray for them?" but I know that may be a touchy subject for her and I'm not totally sure what he did and didn't take of her. She did smile back at me and said, "maybe" before she added, "it's not like you can't see me whenever you want".....


At times I find it hard to believe that this is what I'm now fantasizing about and wanting to experience. As I said, maybe it's what I've wanted to feel all along and that it took Suzanna to come to terms with it as well as to want it for herself. Maybe it's because I don't feel threatened by Robert, at least not just yet.

I still do have some reluctance and hesitation on all of this. I also know that in my head I am thinking that with everything seeming to line up as it has (no small thanks to Suzanna) that whether I am ready for this or not, that the circumstances and desires of all three of us is telling me, whether it's really what I wanted for this summer or not, that at this point we should just let it run its course naturally.

It does pain met to think of possibly going for 3 or more weeks without penetrating her; knowing that it's something I'm agreeing to voluntarily it's even more intense to think about. On the other hand, as I said, serendipitously the circumstances and opportunities are lining up such that if I put the brakes on it, I'm unsure if or when another opportunity like this may arise.

Maybe if we did calm all of this down, then it might happen again of its own chance of fate. I do know that she does still want to have the proverbial 'full blown affair' but my thinking on this is that it will probably wait until after next summer when both of our kids will be out of the house. Our ******** will be at college and hopefully our son will have graduated and be working away somewhere other than from home after college. The thought of her being heavily involved with lovers both this summer and after next is definitely I something I've thought about.


It's after 5pm and I'm wrapping up from work and thinking that she's due home in maybe another 45 minutes. I'm thinking maybe tonight I'll do as she says and leave her be and not pester or bother her to share her evening. Yes, it'll drive me crazy to think of her creamy wet pussy lying beneath her pants and panties but maybe I'll leave it up to her and let her lead on this; see what she wants.

I know at times she thoroughly enjoys my tender ministration to her used pussy but at other times I sense she is 'doing it for me' when she lets me go down on her or share in the moment. I know that if I leave her be today that come Wednesday night that the temptation will be even stronger so maybe that's a good thing.


Another book filled and she's due home any minute. A good time to stop, me thinks.