This is part of an ongoing story that involves interracial cuckoldry, non consensual sex, and other underlying themes that are not meant for every reader. If you don't enjoy white wives taking Black lovers you won't like this story, and I don't suggest reading further. However, if this theme turns you on, read on friend.
The following are selected readings from the diary of Cathleen, over the course of the story this far:
4/21
Dear Diary,
How can I even begin to say how shocked I am! My husband left a WEIRD story on our computer today. I saw it on the desktop, and opened it and it was about a husband that actually enjoyed watching his wife have sex with a BLACK man! I mean WTF!!! Why is he even looking at this, let alone downloading it?!? OK, fine - I read it to the end, I confess. It was pretty hot all told. But still . . . . . . . why this story?
4/29
Dear Diary,
Several more stories on the hard drive, ALL that have white men who watch their wives with BLACK men! What is up with my husband?!?!?!
5/7
Dear Diary,
Well, my husband let slip while we were in bed that he wants to see me have sex with another man!!!!!! How disgusting!!!!! He is fucking perverted!!!!!! I just know that this is some kind of ploy to get me to agree to a threesome for him with his ex, Deb!!! There is NO WAY that I buy the idea that he is gonna push this out there without wanting something in return . . . . . . Still, why all the interracial porn of late? It seems like that's all he brings home anymore. What is going through my husband's head? Does he REALLY want this????? Does he really love me anymore?????? Is that what this is about??????? FUCK!
5/8
Diary-
My husband keeps pushing this fantasy at me, and I have to admit that there is the OUTSIDE chance that I find it intriguing - leave it alone LOL!!
6/1
Dear Diary,
Well, I've been playing along with George's fantasy for a few weeks. I'm starting to like it, at least in fantasy form. I have to admit that I REALLY ENJOY pushing my cum filled pussy into his face!! Naughty, ABSOLUTELY!!! But it's his and if he enjoys licking me after sex, well I do too!! I have such misgivings about even going down this road (even in fantasy), because I feel like such a slut for even THINKING about it . . . but FUCK . . . . . . . I've been with him for so long and life is so short!?!!!!?? What did I miss by getting married so young???
6/20
Diary,
I'm starting to get into George's fantasy!! I won't say that I'd actually DO anything like what he's thinking, but it is starting to get me off . . . . . . . . I married him when I was young, and maybe I missed some opportunities, so to speak. I have an idea, I think I'll do a little 'research' on the Internet and tell him to sit in the living room while I do.
6/21
Diary,
I found a site that caters to white women who want to have sex with Black men! OK, I admit I am curious . . . . . I NEVER was with a Black man and I am curious about what it would be like. Sure I've seen it on video, but the idea of a Black cock pushing it's way inside me, ummmmmmmm, weirdly hot - but in large part because it is so unknown to me. What about the man attached to the cock? This whole thing is strange, but I am starting to get turned on by the idea of fucking another man while my husband watches!!! I know, weird (and you are NOT allowed to judge my dear diary LOL) . . . . . . but if I can fight off the 'slut' feeling, who knows
7/15
Dear Dairy,
I haven't been ignoring you, so much has happened. I decided to tell George that I am open to his desires . . . . . . but I have forced him out of the room as I surf the Internet. I'm spending all my time, and I do mean all, on the site on mentioned before that caters to married white women that are interested in Black men. I have chatted on line with several men (which gave me butterflies hummmmmmmm), Black men. I just know that George is just outside the door, but I can't be bothered. He wanted this, and why shouldn't I take my own husband at his word?
I have been surprised at how gentleman-like the Black men that I have been chatting with on line have been. I must admit that I wasn't expecting that. Still, it isn't hard to sense that they all are eager for a white woman . . . . . . They have been a fresh wind . . . .
7/20
Diary,
I such a naughty BITCH!! I've developed a connection with a Black man on line and I'll let the story speak for itself as it has unfolded. His name is Randy, and I chatted on line with him a few times before I really started to warm up to him. He (Randy) is so interesting, and he LISTENS to me!!!!! Anyway, I told him right off that I was married and wasn't looking to meet and he was totally ok with that, and it made me more interested! So, we talked and talked and talked, and then talked some more (by now we were on web cam) . . . . . . and it started with me deciding to flash him my tits!! It was an impulse, ok forgive me!!! I just wanted to see his reaction, and boy did I get one!! He was not shy about showing his cock (nor should he have been if you know what I mean) . . . . . . . he teased me at first, slowly unbuttoning his shirt and trousers, slipping them down to reveal his boxers, then slowwwwwwwly down with those to reveal a long and thick cock!! I wasn't sure how big it actually was because it was just on my computer. Then he held a bottle of Bud next to it, and it was pretty much the same length, and VERY thick also!! I couldn't believe it, and still don't (or at least can't seem to fathom such a cock actually existing)!!?!??!!!
I typed to him to tell him how impressed I was by what I saw. He wasn't shy about what he wanted to see and very firmly said that he wanted to see my pussy!!!!!!!! I felt completely flush, at first. But after Randy encouraged me (he told me how sexy he thought I was, how turned on I had made him, and so on) I succumbed to his charms. It may seem bizzare, dear diary, but after he bumped up the ante by showing his manhood he kind of made me feel guilty of being a tease if I DIDN'T show him . . . . . . It was bullshit, really, but I didn't want to loose my connection with Randy, and he made it clear that he expected me to pro quid quo. I felt my hands trembling as I hooked my thumbs at the hips of my sweats and slid them down . . . . . . . I couldn't even bring myself to look into the camera lens as I did the deed. Instead I faced to the side as my hands brought the sweats down my legs and off my feet. My thighs felt like jelly as I lifted my legs to the desktop and opened my lips to the web cam.
I looked up at the screen and Randy's cock was totally erect and he was stroking it as he looked right at my married white pussy! I felt so damned naughty and dirty and like I was over ******* all at the same time. I also felt like a bit of a slut, but in a way that seemed to like (my pussy was drenched). I was transfixed as his hands slid over the length of that tool, and as I stared I couldn't help but touch myself. When he came it was in a thick stream, and I could see it clearly on the dark blackness of his hand. It sent me over the edge and I climaxed for this man . . . . . . .
I wrote that I had to go and would contact him, and logged off.
I still can't believe I did that. It was so raw, and I don't regret what happened (except that I feel a bit slutty and ******* to a strange man).
I have to admit that I was intrigued by this man, and his manhood. I married George when I was young, and I didn't really experiment sexually very much. I never had even the twinge of regret, until I saw Randy's manhood. I CANNOT even begin to imagine actually fitting something that big into myself down there. But it is kind of hot to fantasize about, and I have been . . . . . . I have started to catch myself daydreaming about Randy's cock (I know a bit weird) sometimes when I have free time.
7/23
Dear Diary,
What have I gotten myself into? I told myself after the last Internet interlude with Randy I decided not to contact him again. I lasted only one day before I reached out to him. It is not entirely my fault. Damn George for putting me into this situation! I was a perfectly happy housewife and HE pushed me to check out Black cock, and after seeing what I've been missing out on with Randy I couldn't help but think about that Black cock that I saw CONTINUOUSLY since we played sexually on line. I was embarrassed and turned on at the same time. Embarrassed that a man other than my husband had seen my pussy. Turned on for the very same reason. The conflict between the two sides was as effective at making me cream as a hard cock! The twist was erotic and palpable.
So, I gave in to my desires and logged on to 'the site', and saw Randy's handle. He was in a private chat and I sent a message and waited for a response. I was strangely finding myself a bit jealous at the thought that he was talking to another white woman, which is weird I fully well know.
So I had to wait for Randy's attention. Other men messaged me, but I decided to ignore them all. I had chatted with other Black men on the site before Randy. But he was special to me, and I have to admit that I wanted more of him. I felt angry at myself that he was chatting with another white woman, feeling that I might have blown a chance with him by waiting to contact him. Honestly I didn't feel like it was fair to blame him for chatting with other women (since I had kind of blown him off), and not being able to have him at that instant made me want him all the more!! It was making my kind of sick how much I felt like I needed to talk to this man.
Eventually I got a response and had Randy to myself on web cam. We chatted for a while, and he told me that his feelings were hurt by the blowoff, and that it was too bad for me. He told me that he thought I was just playing him, and wanted me to prove that I was committed to him. I asked what he wanted and he told me that he wanted a repeat performance of the other night - but this time he wanted for George to watch as I gave in to him. I pleaded with him that I wasn't comfortable bringing my poor husband into it, to which he responded that that was exactly why he wanted it. Randy demanded that I prove my devotion to him in front of George, and he wouldn't bend. I felt slightly torn. Here was this hot young Black man that had made my pulse race. And in the living room was my loving husband. Randy knew all about George, and was demanding that I basically humiliate George for him.
I decided to give in, and called George into the room. I have to admit that it was fucking hot! Knowing that George wanted to see me with a Black man made the choice easier. But I wasn't prepared for how hard I would cum as I cybered with Randy while my husband watched!
When Randy and I were done I told George to leave the room, and he did. The I typed an IM to Randy asking if he would like to meet in real life tomorrow night! My heart was pounding as I hit send. He responded that he'd love to meet. I wrote back that I'd let him know in the morning, but that I needed to take things VERY SLOW in real life. He replied that he'd never pressure me into anything. We logged off and left it there.
I called my husband back into our bedroom. I gave him every out, diary you HAVE to believe me, of this. I made him just about beg me to take this whole thing to the next step! I am still feeling strange about this, at least a little, and I made him agree that any relationship I have outside out marriage would be completely independent of his control or wishes if I start to see another man . . . . . . and he AGREED!!!!!!!! I thought that would make him back down, and it didn't at all. I just know he will still think that he might still have a choice in this if I start a relationship, but I forced him to concede ALL rights to say ANYTHING if I agreed!!!!!!!!
He still agreed!! So I informed him that I was taking him up on his offer and had a date planned for tomorrow night, and that since I was not comfortable with the idea of dating more than one man at a time he had to move into the guestroom!! And no more sex for him!!!!!
7/24
Dear Diary,
It's 2:30 in the morning, what a date I had tonight!! Randy is so much more than I expected! When we were chatting on line I liked him, fine. But I still thought that meeting in real life would be awkward as hell. But I was COMPLETELY WRONG! He didn't even try to pressure me for sex (which I was expecting and would have bee a total turn off if he had), instead we talked about each other and what we wanted to find if we did decided to date. I felt like I was bringing TONS of baggage to the possible relationship (since I was married), and told Randy all about George and his fixation on me having sex with a Black man being how we had found each other (in a round about way). The thing that surprised me is that he wasn't either A. surprised at, or B. judgmental of George (which I felt a lot of relief about since I DO still love my husband, even if I still don't understand this fantasy from his perspective). Randy has this ability to make me feel like I could tell him ANYTHING, and I pretty much did. I made the conscious decision to reveal everything about my marriage with George. EVERYTHING! I want Randy to feel like he is the man on the inside of this so that he doesn't get scared off by George. I revealed everything my husband and I had tried in bed. I even revealed fantasies that I've never told my husband about because I thought George would be into them.
Randy listened thoughtfully as we sipped wine. He was a gentleman, and offered me some interesting insights about my husband. He informed me that there were a growing number of white husbands that were coming out and admitting to their wives that they wanted the exact same thing as George! I was mesmerized as he assured me that we could date and go to places that catered to just such couples, white wives and their Black lovers!
I decided to call him on it and said that I thought that was bullshit. He offered to take me to just such a night club. I still wasn't ready to get into a stranger's car (since I didn't really know him very well yet), but that I would follow him in my car. He paid our bar tab, and we left.
I followed him to a part of town that could only be called 'the wrong side of the tracks'. We live in the deep south, and things around here are still pretty segregated. We found parking spaces, and I was feeling a little twinge about the uncertainty of the situation. It felt a little scary, but that turned me on.
As Randy and I walked to the door he whispered in my ear saying, "Baby, I don't want any other men hitting on you while we are out. Would you mind if I put my arm around you?"
I felt so warm towards him that he was such a gentleman as to ask. I felt his desire for me right from the start. But by giving me the option I felt like he was respecting me, and so my answer came easy.
"Sure, I'd love that." I said as I gazed into his eyes.
His hand on my hip gave me a twinge of energy. I could FEEL this man's desire for me, more than my husband had shown for some time.
We entered the club, and true to his word the room was composed of white women and Black men! The music was pumping pretty loud and there was a dance floor that was already mostly full. I felt like I was dressed a touch prudish for this particular room. Many of the woman were dressed pretty scantily, but not slutty.
"Let's get a couple of shots of tequila," Randy said into my ear.
"Ummm, I don't want to get too *****," I responded.
"Just one. It's only 11, and we have a couple of hours to dance it off."
"Good point! Let's do it."
We did the shots then hit the dance floor for the rest of the night until we were covered in sweat. He was a great dancer. It started pretty innocently enough but got more and more like Dirty Dancing, YUMMY I LOVED IT!!!!!!!!! I felt his hardness pressed against my increasingly moist womanhood, as well as between my butt cheeks! I ended up slow dancing with him, and let my hands slide down to his ass, holding his cock against my willing pussy as we kissed for the first time!!!!!!
"So when will I see you again," he asked as we kissed at my car.
"Soon, very soon. I definitely want to see you again." I said. I kissed him again before getting into my car and driving home in a daze.
George was waiting up when I walked in the door. He asked me a few questions about the date, which I ignored. I was WAY to horny to talk.
"Just come to the bedroom, I need to be fucked!" I ordered him.
8/15
Dear Diary,
Sorry I haven't written in a while. I've been dating Randy since I last wrote. Things have been much like that first night. Except that I have been slowly letting Randy have more of me and George less. It started with me flashing my titties for him one night at the club. He asked me, explaining that it wasn't uncommon for the white wives in the club to do so. It felt wild that he was so forward with the request, but it turned me on and I did open my shirt for him right there in the club!! Then tonight we played in the back of his Escalade after our night at the club. I didn't need any encouragement to seek his cock in those slacks! Oh Diary, he is soooooooo big! He is soooooo fucking dominant (!!!!!!!!!!), though, and I have found out that I REALLY have a submissive streak!! He gripped my hair used it a reign to control me while I gave him a blow job. What a fucking turn on!!!!!!!!! I NEVER thought that I'd get into that, ummmmmmm!!!
Randy was the first black cock I had in my mouth, and what can I say . . . .
8/16
Diary!
I had to do it again! I called Randy in the afternoon to see if he was busy tonight.
He said 'maybe'.
It sent a tremor through my body. I was afraid that he might have plans with another woman, and I wasn't in the mood to share. I knew I couldn't complain if he went on a date, seeing that I was married and all.
"Ummm, well I'd really like to see you tonight," I said, almost pleading.
"OK, but why wait. Come over to my place right now."
"Tonight would be better. I have to do some things with George, and . . . "
"Look, you are going to have to make a choice. Either being with me is more important to you, or being with him," he snapped. "If you want to be with me then he can wait."
"But I've never been to your place yet . . . why not go out?"
"Why not just come over? Let's do this right, not in the back of my SUV."
I knew what he was getting at. He knew I wanted more of his cock, and he was upping the ante. This would be the first time we were not going to be in public. I felt nervous about how vulnerable I would be in this situation.
"So what's it going to be?" he asked after a short silence. "After last night this is the next step. I know that you were cumming in your panties as you sucked my cock. You should come over and let me ravish your little white body."
At that point I agreed. I simply HAD to take the next step. Having had his cock in my mouth had been too tempting, my taste buds were yearning for more. I knew this would be a deepening of my relationship with Randy, and I wasn't really sure (even then) how George would handle this event.
I felt a bit bad for my husband. Here I was blowing him off for Randy, and ready to give myself to Randy for the first time completely. Then I thought about it and thought 'Fuck it, he wanted this, he talked me into trying this, and he is just going to have to deal with the fact that now I want this too!"
My inner thighs were weak all the way to Randy's. I could barely walk up the stairs to him.
Oh Diary, it all happened so fast once I was inside. I'm still in a daze. Randy was VERY aggressive with me. He was forceful. He was not respectful. And he talked so dirty to me like I was his whore.
The following are selected readings from the diary of Cathleen, over the course of the story this far:
4/21
Dear Diary,
How can I even begin to say how shocked I am! My husband left a WEIRD story on our computer today. I saw it on the desktop, and opened it and it was about a husband that actually enjoyed watching his wife have sex with a BLACK man! I mean WTF!!! Why is he even looking at this, let alone downloading it?!? OK, fine - I read it to the end, I confess. It was pretty hot all told. But still . . . . . . . why this story?
4/29
Dear Diary,
Several more stories on the hard drive, ALL that have white men who watch their wives with BLACK men! What is up with my husband?!?!?!
5/7
Dear Diary,
Well, my husband let slip while we were in bed that he wants to see me have sex with another man!!!!!! How disgusting!!!!! He is fucking perverted!!!!!! I just know that this is some kind of ploy to get me to agree to a threesome for him with his ex, Deb!!! There is NO WAY that I buy the idea that he is gonna push this out there without wanting something in return . . . . . . Still, why all the interracial porn of late? It seems like that's all he brings home anymore. What is going through my husband's head? Does he REALLY want this????? Does he really love me anymore?????? Is that what this is about??????? FUCK!
5/8
Diary-
My husband keeps pushing this fantasy at me, and I have to admit that there is the OUTSIDE chance that I find it intriguing - leave it alone LOL!!
6/1
Dear Diary,
Well, I've been playing along with George's fantasy for a few weeks. I'm starting to like it, at least in fantasy form. I have to admit that I REALLY ENJOY pushing my cum filled pussy into his face!! Naughty, ABSOLUTELY!!! But it's his and if he enjoys licking me after sex, well I do too!! I have such misgivings about even going down this road (even in fantasy), because I feel like such a slut for even THINKING about it . . . but FUCK . . . . . . . I've been with him for so long and life is so short!?!!!!?? What did I miss by getting married so young???
6/20
Diary,
I'm starting to get into George's fantasy!! I won't say that I'd actually DO anything like what he's thinking, but it is starting to get me off . . . . . . . . I married him when I was young, and maybe I missed some opportunities, so to speak. I have an idea, I think I'll do a little 'research' on the Internet and tell him to sit in the living room while I do.
6/21
Diary,
I found a site that caters to white women who want to have sex with Black men! OK, I admit I am curious . . . . . I NEVER was with a Black man and I am curious about what it would be like. Sure I've seen it on video, but the idea of a Black cock pushing it's way inside me, ummmmmmmm, weirdly hot - but in large part because it is so unknown to me. What about the man attached to the cock? This whole thing is strange, but I am starting to get turned on by the idea of fucking another man while my husband watches!!! I know, weird (and you are NOT allowed to judge my dear diary LOL) . . . . . . but if I can fight off the 'slut' feeling, who knows
7/15
Dear Dairy,
I haven't been ignoring you, so much has happened. I decided to tell George that I am open to his desires . . . . . . but I have forced him out of the room as I surf the Internet. I'm spending all my time, and I do mean all, on the site on mentioned before that caters to married white women that are interested in Black men. I have chatted on line with several men (which gave me butterflies hummmmmmmm), Black men. I just know that George is just outside the door, but I can't be bothered. He wanted this, and why shouldn't I take my own husband at his word?
I have been surprised at how gentleman-like the Black men that I have been chatting with on line have been. I must admit that I wasn't expecting that. Still, it isn't hard to sense that they all are eager for a white woman . . . . . . They have been a fresh wind . . . .
7/20
Diary,
I such a naughty BITCH!! I've developed a connection with a Black man on line and I'll let the story speak for itself as it has unfolded. His name is Randy, and I chatted on line with him a few times before I really started to warm up to him. He (Randy) is so interesting, and he LISTENS to me!!!!! Anyway, I told him right off that I was married and wasn't looking to meet and he was totally ok with that, and it made me more interested! So, we talked and talked and talked, and then talked some more (by now we were on web cam) . . . . . . and it started with me deciding to flash him my tits!! It was an impulse, ok forgive me!!! I just wanted to see his reaction, and boy did I get one!! He was not shy about showing his cock (nor should he have been if you know what I mean) . . . . . . . he teased me at first, slowly unbuttoning his shirt and trousers, slipping them down to reveal his boxers, then slowwwwwwwly down with those to reveal a long and thick cock!! I wasn't sure how big it actually was because it was just on my computer. Then he held a bottle of Bud next to it, and it was pretty much the same length, and VERY thick also!! I couldn't believe it, and still don't (or at least can't seem to fathom such a cock actually existing)!!?!??!!!
I typed to him to tell him how impressed I was by what I saw. He wasn't shy about what he wanted to see and very firmly said that he wanted to see my pussy!!!!!!!! I felt completely flush, at first. But after Randy encouraged me (he told me how sexy he thought I was, how turned on I had made him, and so on) I succumbed to his charms. It may seem bizzare, dear diary, but after he bumped up the ante by showing his manhood he kind of made me feel guilty of being a tease if I DIDN'T show him . . . . . . It was bullshit, really, but I didn't want to loose my connection with Randy, and he made it clear that he expected me to pro quid quo. I felt my hands trembling as I hooked my thumbs at the hips of my sweats and slid them down . . . . . . . I couldn't even bring myself to look into the camera lens as I did the deed. Instead I faced to the side as my hands brought the sweats down my legs and off my feet. My thighs felt like jelly as I lifted my legs to the desktop and opened my lips to the web cam.
I looked up at the screen and Randy's cock was totally erect and he was stroking it as he looked right at my married white pussy! I felt so damned naughty and dirty and like I was over ******* all at the same time. I also felt like a bit of a slut, but in a way that seemed to like (my pussy was drenched). I was transfixed as his hands slid over the length of that tool, and as I stared I couldn't help but touch myself. When he came it was in a thick stream, and I could see it clearly on the dark blackness of his hand. It sent me over the edge and I climaxed for this man . . . . . . .
I wrote that I had to go and would contact him, and logged off.
I still can't believe I did that. It was so raw, and I don't regret what happened (except that I feel a bit slutty and ******* to a strange man).
I have to admit that I was intrigued by this man, and his manhood. I married George when I was young, and I didn't really experiment sexually very much. I never had even the twinge of regret, until I saw Randy's manhood. I CANNOT even begin to imagine actually fitting something that big into myself down there. But it is kind of hot to fantasize about, and I have been . . . . . . I have started to catch myself daydreaming about Randy's cock (I know a bit weird) sometimes when I have free time.
7/23
Dear Diary,
What have I gotten myself into? I told myself after the last Internet interlude with Randy I decided not to contact him again. I lasted only one day before I reached out to him. It is not entirely my fault. Damn George for putting me into this situation! I was a perfectly happy housewife and HE pushed me to check out Black cock, and after seeing what I've been missing out on with Randy I couldn't help but think about that Black cock that I saw CONTINUOUSLY since we played sexually on line. I was embarrassed and turned on at the same time. Embarrassed that a man other than my husband had seen my pussy. Turned on for the very same reason. The conflict between the two sides was as effective at making me cream as a hard cock! The twist was erotic and palpable.
So, I gave in to my desires and logged on to 'the site', and saw Randy's handle. He was in a private chat and I sent a message and waited for a response. I was strangely finding myself a bit jealous at the thought that he was talking to another white woman, which is weird I fully well know.
So I had to wait for Randy's attention. Other men messaged me, but I decided to ignore them all. I had chatted with other Black men on the site before Randy. But he was special to me, and I have to admit that I wanted more of him. I felt angry at myself that he was chatting with another white woman, feeling that I might have blown a chance with him by waiting to contact him. Honestly I didn't feel like it was fair to blame him for chatting with other women (since I had kind of blown him off), and not being able to have him at that instant made me want him all the more!! It was making my kind of sick how much I felt like I needed to talk to this man.
Eventually I got a response and had Randy to myself on web cam. We chatted for a while, and he told me that his feelings were hurt by the blowoff, and that it was too bad for me. He told me that he thought I was just playing him, and wanted me to prove that I was committed to him. I asked what he wanted and he told me that he wanted a repeat performance of the other night - but this time he wanted for George to watch as I gave in to him. I pleaded with him that I wasn't comfortable bringing my poor husband into it, to which he responded that that was exactly why he wanted it. Randy demanded that I prove my devotion to him in front of George, and he wouldn't bend. I felt slightly torn. Here was this hot young Black man that had made my pulse race. And in the living room was my loving husband. Randy knew all about George, and was demanding that I basically humiliate George for him.
I decided to give in, and called George into the room. I have to admit that it was fucking hot! Knowing that George wanted to see me with a Black man made the choice easier. But I wasn't prepared for how hard I would cum as I cybered with Randy while my husband watched!
When Randy and I were done I told George to leave the room, and he did. The I typed an IM to Randy asking if he would like to meet in real life tomorrow night! My heart was pounding as I hit send. He responded that he'd love to meet. I wrote back that I'd let him know in the morning, but that I needed to take things VERY SLOW in real life. He replied that he'd never pressure me into anything. We logged off and left it there.
I called my husband back into our bedroom. I gave him every out, diary you HAVE to believe me, of this. I made him just about beg me to take this whole thing to the next step! I am still feeling strange about this, at least a little, and I made him agree that any relationship I have outside out marriage would be completely independent of his control or wishes if I start to see another man . . . . . . and he AGREED!!!!!!!! I thought that would make him back down, and it didn't at all. I just know he will still think that he might still have a choice in this if I start a relationship, but I forced him to concede ALL rights to say ANYTHING if I agreed!!!!!!!!
He still agreed!! So I informed him that I was taking him up on his offer and had a date planned for tomorrow night, and that since I was not comfortable with the idea of dating more than one man at a time he had to move into the guestroom!! And no more sex for him!!!!!
7/24
Dear Diary,
It's 2:30 in the morning, what a date I had tonight!! Randy is so much more than I expected! When we were chatting on line I liked him, fine. But I still thought that meeting in real life would be awkward as hell. But I was COMPLETELY WRONG! He didn't even try to pressure me for sex (which I was expecting and would have bee a total turn off if he had), instead we talked about each other and what we wanted to find if we did decided to date. I felt like I was bringing TONS of baggage to the possible relationship (since I was married), and told Randy all about George and his fixation on me having sex with a Black man being how we had found each other (in a round about way). The thing that surprised me is that he wasn't either A. surprised at, or B. judgmental of George (which I felt a lot of relief about since I DO still love my husband, even if I still don't understand this fantasy from his perspective). Randy has this ability to make me feel like I could tell him ANYTHING, and I pretty much did. I made the conscious decision to reveal everything about my marriage with George. EVERYTHING! I want Randy to feel like he is the man on the inside of this so that he doesn't get scared off by George. I revealed everything my husband and I had tried in bed. I even revealed fantasies that I've never told my husband about because I thought George would be into them.
Randy listened thoughtfully as we sipped wine. He was a gentleman, and offered me some interesting insights about my husband. He informed me that there were a growing number of white husbands that were coming out and admitting to their wives that they wanted the exact same thing as George! I was mesmerized as he assured me that we could date and go to places that catered to just such couples, white wives and their Black lovers!
I decided to call him on it and said that I thought that was bullshit. He offered to take me to just such a night club. I still wasn't ready to get into a stranger's car (since I didn't really know him very well yet), but that I would follow him in my car. He paid our bar tab, and we left.
I followed him to a part of town that could only be called 'the wrong side of the tracks'. We live in the deep south, and things around here are still pretty segregated. We found parking spaces, and I was feeling a little twinge about the uncertainty of the situation. It felt a little scary, but that turned me on.
As Randy and I walked to the door he whispered in my ear saying, "Baby, I don't want any other men hitting on you while we are out. Would you mind if I put my arm around you?"
I felt so warm towards him that he was such a gentleman as to ask. I felt his desire for me right from the start. But by giving me the option I felt like he was respecting me, and so my answer came easy.
"Sure, I'd love that." I said as I gazed into his eyes.
His hand on my hip gave me a twinge of energy. I could FEEL this man's desire for me, more than my husband had shown for some time.
We entered the club, and true to his word the room was composed of white women and Black men! The music was pumping pretty loud and there was a dance floor that was already mostly full. I felt like I was dressed a touch prudish for this particular room. Many of the woman were dressed pretty scantily, but not slutty.
"Let's get a couple of shots of tequila," Randy said into my ear.
"Ummm, I don't want to get too *****," I responded.
"Just one. It's only 11, and we have a couple of hours to dance it off."
"Good point! Let's do it."
We did the shots then hit the dance floor for the rest of the night until we were covered in sweat. He was a great dancer. It started pretty innocently enough but got more and more like Dirty Dancing, YUMMY I LOVED IT!!!!!!!!! I felt his hardness pressed against my increasingly moist womanhood, as well as between my butt cheeks! I ended up slow dancing with him, and let my hands slide down to his ass, holding his cock against my willing pussy as we kissed for the first time!!!!!!
"So when will I see you again," he asked as we kissed at my car.
"Soon, very soon. I definitely want to see you again." I said. I kissed him again before getting into my car and driving home in a daze.
George was waiting up when I walked in the door. He asked me a few questions about the date, which I ignored. I was WAY to horny to talk.
"Just come to the bedroom, I need to be fucked!" I ordered him.
8/15
Dear Diary,
Sorry I haven't written in a while. I've been dating Randy since I last wrote. Things have been much like that first night. Except that I have been slowly letting Randy have more of me and George less. It started with me flashing my titties for him one night at the club. He asked me, explaining that it wasn't uncommon for the white wives in the club to do so. It felt wild that he was so forward with the request, but it turned me on and I did open my shirt for him right there in the club!! Then tonight we played in the back of his Escalade after our night at the club. I didn't need any encouragement to seek his cock in those slacks! Oh Diary, he is soooooooo big! He is soooooo fucking dominant (!!!!!!!!!!), though, and I have found out that I REALLY have a submissive streak!! He gripped my hair used it a reign to control me while I gave him a blow job. What a fucking turn on!!!!!!!!! I NEVER thought that I'd get into that, ummmmmmm!!!
Randy was the first black cock I had in my mouth, and what can I say . . . .
8/16
Diary!
I had to do it again! I called Randy in the afternoon to see if he was busy tonight.
He said 'maybe'.
It sent a tremor through my body. I was afraid that he might have plans with another woman, and I wasn't in the mood to share. I knew I couldn't complain if he went on a date, seeing that I was married and all.
"Ummm, well I'd really like to see you tonight," I said, almost pleading.
"OK, but why wait. Come over to my place right now."
"Tonight would be better. I have to do some things with George, and . . . "
"Look, you are going to have to make a choice. Either being with me is more important to you, or being with him," he snapped. "If you want to be with me then he can wait."
"But I've never been to your place yet . . . why not go out?"
"Why not just come over? Let's do this right, not in the back of my SUV."
I knew what he was getting at. He knew I wanted more of his cock, and he was upping the ante. This would be the first time we were not going to be in public. I felt nervous about how vulnerable I would be in this situation.
"So what's it going to be?" he asked after a short silence. "After last night this is the next step. I know that you were cumming in your panties as you sucked my cock. You should come over and let me ravish your little white body."
At that point I agreed. I simply HAD to take the next step. Having had his cock in my mouth had been too tempting, my taste buds were yearning for more. I knew this would be a deepening of my relationship with Randy, and I wasn't really sure (even then) how George would handle this event.
I felt a bit bad for my husband. Here I was blowing him off for Randy, and ready to give myself to Randy for the first time completely. Then I thought about it and thought 'Fuck it, he wanted this, he talked me into trying this, and he is just going to have to deal with the fact that now I want this too!"
My inner thighs were weak all the way to Randy's. I could barely walk up the stairs to him.
Oh Diary, it all happened so fast once I was inside. I'm still in a daze. Randy was VERY aggressive with me. He was forceful. He was not respectful. And he talked so dirty to me like I was his whore.
