Valerie's [Blacked] Birthday (Part I: Arrival)
[February 22, 2032]
“Val, why are you wearing that? I thought you picked out a dress for our dinner tonight…?”
Said Chad as he rode shotgun beside the love of his life. Looking to his left, he took in her beautiful dark-brunette hair. Cut to just above her shoulders, she looked truly radiant in his eyes, a perfect queen. Her hazel eyes left the road to stare daggers at him, and she said with a twinge of anger,
“You know why, Chad! I told you already, we’re going to the BBC rally before our dinner date, and I’ve gotta show my support, it’s important for Christ’s sake! I spent all that time making that sign, I’m not gonna miss out on using it!”
She turned back to the matter at hand, gripping the wheel with white knuckles. Leaning over the console, Chad kissed her cheek. As if in adoration, as soon as he pulled away, she placed her hand over the spot. Damn you’re so sexy- His thought was cut off when he got his first good look at the organization’s merch-shirt.
“Babe, you do know what ‘BBC’ stands for right?”
They ran a red light as her glare returned. A car’s honk dopplered in and out of hearing as they passed within an inch of being t-boned and ending the whole mess then and there. Even when you’re upset, you’re lovely. The betrothal ring in his pants pocket was money well spent, he thought. I’m gonna take her to her favorite fancy dinner joint, and then we’re going to our special place where I’ll propose and it’ll be the happiest day of her life, I know it!
“Yessss Chad, I know! It stands for the Beautiful Black Community! It even says so on my shirt, see?”
Chad scanned it once more, and he fired back,
“I see the acronym, but it also says, ‘I am a White Woman who Loves BBC.’ And what’s that spade with a ‘Q’ in the middle for?”
Valerie huffed as he saw the rally location up ahead. She retorted,
“Its an anti-racist symbol, Chad, you wouldn’t understand. Seriously, I can’t believe you said all that racist shit earlier. Pastor Phil-”
He cut in rather matter-of-factly,
“Pastor Phil was accused of sexually assaulting minors, Val, that is a fact and not some white-supremacist nonsense. Ten girls and five boys, Valerie. I don’t-”
Why is he being so fucking racist?! God damn it, Chad you’re so sweet, but shut the fuck up! Her Black Studies professor, the venerable Doctor Barnes told their class,
“Remember my ripe young pupils, Black Lives Matter. It doesn’t matter what a man or woman’s sins are, they matter, and I’d dare say they have more worth to me than a lot of white-folk’s lives. Now, repeat after me everyone, ahem, ‘Black, Lives, Matter!’”
In a fit of pique, Valerie rebuked Chad, saying,
“Shut up! Shut up with your ***’s racist shit! I don’t care what Wolf News tells him, he’s a racist white-bigot! You know what really happened? Fifteen racist and homophobic cis-white fathers accused a visionary like Pastor Phil of ****** their seventeen-year-old children… but here’s the thing. Of those fifteen? None of them accused him of a damn thing! They all had nothing but good things to say about him. Doesn’t matter though, the white pigs killed him anyway those damn monsters.”
Valerie followed the signage, and soon the parking lot was in sight. Chad asked her,
“Don’t you think it’s a little racist to say ‘white pigs’? We’re-”
I’m a worthless colonizer, I need to atone, I must atone! Valerie let out an internal mental sob as she had to educate Chad once more on this issue.
“Babe, we’re racist, murderous, colonizers! We’ve oppressed the African Race for far, far too long. Now either I’m going to show my support, or you can find a different ride home! Pastor Phil was a visionary… He had this idea about a New World Order, led by the Black Race as they guided us all to a brighter future in harmony. I don’t get why this is such a big deal to you so suddenly. You liked my Instagram essay about him the day he was murdered for… ugh, ‘resisting arrest’.”
Valerie took the right and found a parking space after five minutes of searching. After parking and making sure she had everything she and Chad needed, she made doubly sure to lock her car. They were in the rougher part of Southern Chicago after all… Fuck! I’m so racist. I’m sorry, I’m sorry, please don’t hate me, I’m doing better!
Chad hugged her from the side, and he told her,
“I’m sorry honey, I’m trying for you, ok? You look lovely, even if your shirt is two sizes too small. Hah… I can’t believe I have you.”
She looked up into his deep, blue eyes and saw the man she had fallen for. Sure, your penis is small… but I love you too much to care. Size isn’t everything, and your tongue is better than all of my girlfriends and ex-boyfriends combined. Valerie kissed his cheek, adding,
“Don’t try for me, my love. Try for them. Trust me, you’ll love activism once you get into it. Now, let’s find the registration tent and see where we’re needed, huh?”
Chad had other ideas, his hands finding her soft ass. She leaned into his out of shape body as his soft hands groped her. Mmm… Yet she had to maintain decency, especially in a place like this. It almost felt dirty for him to touch her at all, let alone like this. She could see dozens of fit, tall black men walking by, and she felt intimidated by their presence. Chad whispered,
“I think we’ll have plenty of fun later, huh? What’s a little walking and protesting?”
Now you’re getting it! Unable to suppress a moan, she told him,
“Knock it off, you’re not gonna get lucky until after everything at the earliest, ok?”
His hands left her ass, and relieving some of the filth from her soul… Now if only I could cleanse the filth of my pale skin!
“Val, why are you wearing that? I thought you picked out a dress for our dinner tonight…?”
Said Chad as he rode shotgun beside the love of his life. Looking to his left, he took in her beautiful dark-brunette hair. Cut to just above her shoulders, she looked truly radiant in his eyes, a perfect queen. Her hazel eyes left the road to stare daggers at him, and she said with a twinge of anger,
“You know why, Chad! I told you already, we’re going to the BBC rally before our dinner date, and I’ve gotta show my support, it’s important for Christ’s sake! I spent all that time making that sign, I’m not gonna miss out on using it!”
She turned back to the matter at hand, gripping the wheel with white knuckles. Leaning over the console, Chad kissed her cheek. As if in adoration, as soon as he pulled away, she placed her hand over the spot. Damn you’re so sexy- His thought was cut off when he got his first good look at the organization’s merch-shirt.
“Babe, you do know what ‘BBC’ stands for right?”
They ran a red light as her glare returned. A car’s honk dopplered in and out of hearing as they passed within an inch of being t-boned and ending the whole mess then and there. Even when you’re upset, you’re lovely. The betrothal ring in his pants pocket was money well spent, he thought. I’m gonna take her to her favorite fancy dinner joint, and then we’re going to our special place where I’ll propose and it’ll be the happiest day of her life, I know it!
“Yessss Chad, I know! It stands for the Beautiful Black Community! It even says so on my shirt, see?”
Chad scanned it once more, and he fired back,
“I see the acronym, but it also says, ‘I am a White Woman who Loves BBC.’ And what’s that spade with a ‘Q’ in the middle for?”
Valerie huffed as he saw the rally location up ahead. She retorted,
“Its an anti-racist symbol, Chad, you wouldn’t understand. Seriously, I can’t believe you said all that racist shit earlier. Pastor Phil-”
He cut in rather matter-of-factly,
“Pastor Phil was accused of sexually assaulting minors, Val, that is a fact and not some white-supremacist nonsense. Ten girls and five boys, Valerie. I don’t-”
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Why is he being so fucking racist?! God damn it, Chad you’re so sweet, but shut the fuck up! Her Black Studies professor, the venerable Doctor Barnes told their class,
“Remember my ripe young pupils, Black Lives Matter. It doesn’t matter what a man or woman’s sins are, they matter, and I’d dare say they have more worth to me than a lot of white-folk’s lives. Now, repeat after me everyone, ahem, ‘Black, Lives, Matter!’”
In a fit of pique, Valerie rebuked Chad, saying,
“Shut up! Shut up with your ***’s racist shit! I don’t care what Wolf News tells him, he’s a racist white-bigot! You know what really happened? Fifteen racist and homophobic cis-white fathers accused a visionary like Pastor Phil of ****** their seventeen-year-old children… but here’s the thing. Of those fifteen? None of them accused him of a damn thing! They all had nothing but good things to say about him. Doesn’t matter though, the white pigs killed him anyway those damn monsters.”
Valerie followed the signage, and soon the parking lot was in sight. Chad asked her,
“Don’t you think it’s a little racist to say ‘white pigs’? We’re-”
I’m a worthless colonizer, I need to atone, I must atone! Valerie let out an internal mental sob as she had to educate Chad once more on this issue.
“Babe, we’re racist, murderous, colonizers! We’ve oppressed the African Race for far, far too long. Now either I’m going to show my support, or you can find a different ride home! Pastor Phil was a visionary… He had this idea about a New World Order, led by the Black Race as they guided us all to a brighter future in harmony. I don’t get why this is such a big deal to you so suddenly. You liked my Instagram essay about him the day he was murdered for… ugh, ‘resisting arrest’.”
Valerie took the right and found a parking space after five minutes of searching. After parking and making sure she had everything she and Chad needed, she made doubly sure to lock her car. They were in the rougher part of Southern Chicago after all… Fuck! I’m so racist. I’m sorry, I’m sorry, please don’t hate me, I’m doing better!
Chad hugged her from the side, and he told her,
“I’m sorry honey, I’m trying for you, ok? You look lovely, even if your shirt is two sizes too small. Hah… I can’t believe I have you.”
She looked up into his deep, blue eyes and saw the man she had fallen for. Sure, your penis is small… but I love you too much to care. Size isn’t everything, and your tongue is better than all of my girlfriends and ex-boyfriends combined. Valerie kissed his cheek, adding,
“Don’t try for me, my love. Try for them. Trust me, you’ll love activism once you get into it. Now, let’s find the registration tent and see where we’re needed, huh?”
Chad had other ideas, his hands finding her soft ass. She leaned into his out of shape body as his soft hands groped her. Mmm… Yet she had to maintain decency, especially in a place like this. It almost felt dirty for him to touch her at all, let alone like this. She could see dozens of fit, tall black men walking by, and she felt intimidated by their presence. Chad whispered,
“I think we’ll have plenty of fun later, huh? What’s a little walking and protesting?”
Now you’re getting it! Unable to suppress a moan, she told him,
“Knock it off, you’re not gonna get lucky until after everything at the earliest, ok?”
His hands left her ass, and relieving some of the filth from her soul… Now if only I could cleanse the filth of my pale skin!
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