I was very reluctant to register here but I've been dealing with these feelings for a while now and I feel like there's no one I can talk to. I am a 42 year old heterosexual woman. What is wrong with me? My husband and I have been married for 12 years and have a 11year old ********! I am 5ft10 tall heterosexual curvy hourglass shaped attractive brunette. I have very large breasts(32GG) and i do have a big butt. I don't intend to dress in any particular 'way' for anyone. I just wear what I like. I don't 'ask' for anything. I don't ask to be groped. I wear clothes that fit me properly. Most of my outfit are satin pant and skirt suits satin coats and satin and silk blouses. I am always on high heels and full make up on. If you are curvy, tall and busty, many clothes tend to look sexier on you than on a thin person. So things that fit properly that are relatively conservative can be suddenly too revealing and sexy when you put it on. This happens to me a lot. I wear almost always my satin and silk blouses fully buttoned to the top combined with a satin skirt or satin pants. I don't wear anything vulgar but because of my body type anything i wear looks tight on me. Being tall and curvy draws attention on its own. This can be both positive and negative. I tower over plenty of men and women. I was sexualised from a very early age, and shamed for the way my body looks - something I have no control over. I can't help how wide my hips grow or how big my breasts get.
My mother used to shame me for the way my body looked. If I wanted to wear a skirt or dress, she always discouraged it, she always thought my skirt was 'too short' or 'too tight', or there was something wrong with my dress-sense. There's always guys flirting or asking me for my number. When I go out in public guys start talking to me and subtly try to ask me out. I mention I have a husband but some of them wont go away. I have trouble being mean so i cant get them to leave me alone. I end up getting stressed by it. The irony is that all this time I've been afraid of men, perceiving any touch as a sexual advance that I should fear - when really, it was a short, skinny old woman I should have feared. My story just seems so implausible that I feel I won't be believed.
I moved here with my ****** 4 months ago. There is this 53year old skinny short 5ft3 tall wrinkled face thin lips green eyes grayhaired masculine ugly lesbian woman who lives three houses from me. 13 days ago i attended this wine store opening party. I was wearing a purple long sleeve satin blouse buttoned up to the top,black satin pencil skirt, sheer black pantyhose and 5 inch heels purple shoes. This woman my lesbian neighbor was there.Before this wine store opening party I had only spoken her once. She walked up to me and she placed her right hand on my back and started rubbing in circular motions."I'm sorry,"s he whispered - "It's just that i can’t resist touching and stroking satin fabric". I was speechelless. She kept rubbing my back with her right hand for like 10 minutes. Then she began furthering her reach and casually brushed across my butt. Then she did it again and left her hand there. I was talking with other women she was standing beside me with her right hand caressing my ass. Then she started rubbing my back, arms, shoulders and my ass as she was standing behind me. "I'm sorry,"she said - "It's just that i can’t resist touching and stroking satin fabric. It is not sexual at all.It's just so soft and smooth, - do you mind if I feel it for just a moment more? ". .
Then she hugged me from the back and her hands subtly cupped my breasts and started to caress them. She was caressing and patting my breasts. I was just standing stiff as a board not saying a word while she was feeling up my boobs for like 5 minutes as people watched. Other people were weirded out but they ignored that and said/did nothing as if nothing was happening.I think that the women were in shock themselves? Some people don’t like to get involved if they feel uncomfortable or not sure what is going on. Also I am physically stronger than this woman my neighbor . I am 5ft10 tall well built well endowed and curvy. She is masculine but she is 5ft3 tall and skinny. I was on 5inch high heels she was in sneakers.Standing next to me she looks like a midget. She is tiny short skinny 53year old masculine woman. She is not intimidating.
.
As she was holding me from behind with her hands patting and caressing my breasts i I developed sensation! I got super aroused. Then i sat on a chair. She sat next to me on my right side. She invaded my personal space repeatedly. She hugged me around my waist with her left hand, rubbing my right arm and shoulder with her right hand. I got up, while she was still sitting and she rubbed my ass with her both hands.
As we were leaving i pulled her aside and said to her " I have a thing with personal space.” I explained to her that it is making me uncomfortable that i understand that she is friendly and tactile but i feels a little uncomfortable when she touches me. I said that i am straight and that i never had any desire to do anything sexual with a female and that just thinking about possibly kissing a female makes me cringe. She said to me that i am mis-reading the creep factor. Then she said to me " You are an arrogant snob ! You stupid overdressed cow. Standing next to you i look like a midget. You are physically stronger than me. It's just that i can’t resist touching and stroking satin fabric." Also she said that she is an extroverted, touchy-feely, huggy person. As she was standing in front of me( her face is exactly the level of my breasts) she said "Your boobs are sooo large" and reached out with her both hands and grabbed my boobs and jiggled and squished them. I was too shocked to say anything about it. She was feeling up, squeezing and jiggling my boobs for like 10 minutes . I was just standing there stiff as a board while she was feeling up my boobs . I was just standing there in the middle of the parking lot kind of awkwardly letting it happen. Even i was unable to speak coherently.I was going “ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm” ” errrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr rrrrrrr” for ages and ages while she was rubbing my breasts. Then we walked to our cars and we left.
What is wrong with me? I’m so ashamed that I couldn’t even say no or push this short skinny old neighbor woman away. I do not see myself as a victim.I really enjoyed having my breasts and ass touched by this ugly skinny midget woman , so I love this. When her hands were rubbing my ass or squeezing and feeling up my breasts i got groinal responses. I know you can't help feelings of arousal, but what bothers me is i worry about letting myself enjoy them. know that this doesn't mean that I'm gay as such, because I've had sex with men and I like men! I'm so worried that this isn't normal! Having my ass rubbed and my breasts squeezed, jiggled and massaged(over clothes) by this ugly short skinny creepy woman my neighbor is something I liked. What is wrong with me? I am a straight woman, I love men, simple! I am straight and I am completely 100 percent straight. I have never been attracted to a woman sexually. I am STRICTLY hetero. Even the thought of eating out a vagina makes me gag. I've never had any desire to do anything sexual with a female. Also this groper neighbor dyke is ugly and repulsive to me. So i feel like since i got my feelings of arousal from the groinal responses then i'm a bisexual cheating whore. Is this normal or am i horrible?? I think i'm a a slut. I'm 100% percent straight. I'm not attracted to this ugly short skinny woman neighbor or anything. Please give me some advice!!!!!!!!!
I must admit that i it turned me on that this ugly short skinny masculine woman that would not even be anywhere near my league was so dominant and aggressive with me. What is wrong with me? My mind hasn't been able to think straight in days. I love my husband and he loves me so much. We have a wonderful and caring marriage. We hug and kiss and don't care about showing our love to the world.
But,
Over the past four years or so my husbands sex drive as been super low. To the point where if he doesn't initiate sex, we don't have sex more than once every month unless I initiate it. He loves sex, and it's very easy for me to turn him on and get things going, the problem is is that I'm getting tired of being the only one to initiate it.
He tells me he thinks I'm beautiful and sexy all the time, but sexually I feel undesired and like he no longer finds me attractive to the point of wanting to have sex with me.
I have mentioned this to him countless times, and in our conversations we both cry, he apologizes and reaffirms his love and affection for me. He promises to be better because he claims he wants sex. He's just tired, or doesn't think of it, or something.
The thing is, we have had this conversation so many times and nothing has changed. I don't want to hurt my husband and I don't know what to do.
My mother used to shame me for the way my body looked. If I wanted to wear a skirt or dress, she always discouraged it, she always thought my skirt was 'too short' or 'too tight', or there was something wrong with my dress-sense. There's always guys flirting or asking me for my number. When I go out in public guys start talking to me and subtly try to ask me out. I mention I have a husband but some of them wont go away. I have trouble being mean so i cant get them to leave me alone. I end up getting stressed by it. The irony is that all this time I've been afraid of men, perceiving any touch as a sexual advance that I should fear - when really, it was a short, skinny old woman I should have feared. My story just seems so implausible that I feel I won't be believed.
I moved here with my ****** 4 months ago. There is this 53year old skinny short 5ft3 tall wrinkled face thin lips green eyes grayhaired masculine ugly lesbian woman who lives three houses from me. 13 days ago i attended this wine store opening party. I was wearing a purple long sleeve satin blouse buttoned up to the top,black satin pencil skirt, sheer black pantyhose and 5 inch heels purple shoes. This woman my lesbian neighbor was there.Before this wine store opening party I had only spoken her once. She walked up to me and she placed her right hand on my back and started rubbing in circular motions."I'm sorry,"s he whispered - "It's just that i can’t resist touching and stroking satin fabric". I was speechelless. She kept rubbing my back with her right hand for like 10 minutes. Then she began furthering her reach and casually brushed across my butt. Then she did it again and left her hand there. I was talking with other women she was standing beside me with her right hand caressing my ass. Then she started rubbing my back, arms, shoulders and my ass as she was standing behind me. "I'm sorry,"she said - "It's just that i can’t resist touching and stroking satin fabric. It is not sexual at all.It's just so soft and smooth, - do you mind if I feel it for just a moment more? ". .
Then she hugged me from the back and her hands subtly cupped my breasts and started to caress them. She was caressing and patting my breasts. I was just standing stiff as a board not saying a word while she was feeling up my boobs for like 5 minutes as people watched. Other people were weirded out but they ignored that and said/did nothing as if nothing was happening.I think that the women were in shock themselves? Some people don’t like to get involved if they feel uncomfortable or not sure what is going on. Also I am physically stronger than this woman my neighbor . I am 5ft10 tall well built well endowed and curvy. She is masculine but she is 5ft3 tall and skinny. I was on 5inch high heels she was in sneakers.Standing next to me she looks like a midget. She is tiny short skinny 53year old masculine woman. She is not intimidating.
.
As she was holding me from behind with her hands patting and caressing my breasts i I developed sensation! I got super aroused. Then i sat on a chair. She sat next to me on my right side. She invaded my personal space repeatedly. She hugged me around my waist with her left hand, rubbing my right arm and shoulder with her right hand. I got up, while she was still sitting and she rubbed my ass with her both hands.
As we were leaving i pulled her aside and said to her " I have a thing with personal space.” I explained to her that it is making me uncomfortable that i understand that she is friendly and tactile but i feels a little uncomfortable when she touches me. I said that i am straight and that i never had any desire to do anything sexual with a female and that just thinking about possibly kissing a female makes me cringe. She said to me that i am mis-reading the creep factor. Then she said to me " You are an arrogant snob ! You stupid overdressed cow. Standing next to you i look like a midget. You are physically stronger than me. It's just that i can’t resist touching and stroking satin fabric." Also she said that she is an extroverted, touchy-feely, huggy person. As she was standing in front of me( her face is exactly the level of my breasts) she said "Your boobs are sooo large" and reached out with her both hands and grabbed my boobs and jiggled and squished them. I was too shocked to say anything about it. She was feeling up, squeezing and jiggling my boobs for like 10 minutes . I was just standing there stiff as a board while she was feeling up my boobs . I was just standing there in the middle of the parking lot kind of awkwardly letting it happen. Even i was unable to speak coherently.I was going “ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm” ” errrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr rrrrrrr” for ages and ages while she was rubbing my breasts. Then we walked to our cars and we left.
What is wrong with me? I’m so ashamed that I couldn’t even say no or push this short skinny old neighbor woman away. I do not see myself as a victim.I really enjoyed having my breasts and ass touched by this ugly skinny midget woman , so I love this. When her hands were rubbing my ass or squeezing and feeling up my breasts i got groinal responses. I know you can't help feelings of arousal, but what bothers me is i worry about letting myself enjoy them. know that this doesn't mean that I'm gay as such, because I've had sex with men and I like men! I'm so worried that this isn't normal! Having my ass rubbed and my breasts squeezed, jiggled and massaged(over clothes) by this ugly short skinny creepy woman my neighbor is something I liked. What is wrong with me? I am a straight woman, I love men, simple! I am straight and I am completely 100 percent straight. I have never been attracted to a woman sexually. I am STRICTLY hetero. Even the thought of eating out a vagina makes me gag. I've never had any desire to do anything sexual with a female. Also this groper neighbor dyke is ugly and repulsive to me. So i feel like since i got my feelings of arousal from the groinal responses then i'm a bisexual cheating whore. Is this normal or am i horrible?? I think i'm a a slut. I'm 100% percent straight. I'm not attracted to this ugly short skinny woman neighbor or anything. Please give me some advice!!!!!!!!!
I must admit that i it turned me on that this ugly short skinny masculine woman that would not even be anywhere near my league was so dominant and aggressive with me. What is wrong with me? My mind hasn't been able to think straight in days. I love my husband and he loves me so much. We have a wonderful and caring marriage. We hug and kiss and don't care about showing our love to the world.
But,
Over the past four years or so my husbands sex drive as been super low. To the point where if he doesn't initiate sex, we don't have sex more than once every month unless I initiate it. He loves sex, and it's very easy for me to turn him on and get things going, the problem is is that I'm getting tired of being the only one to initiate it.
He tells me he thinks I'm beautiful and sexy all the time, but sexually I feel undesired and like he no longer finds me attractive to the point of wanting to have sex with me.
I have mentioned this to him countless times, and in our conversations we both cry, he apologizes and reaffirms his love and affection for me. He promises to be better because he claims he wants sex. He's just tired, or doesn't think of it, or something.
The thing is, we have had this conversation so many times and nothing has changed. I don't want to hurt my husband and I don't know what to do.