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I am suffering from a paralyzing fear of short masculine lesbians.

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Stella1976, May 25, 2018.

  1. Stella1976

    Stella1976 Member Member

    This has been going on towards me since i was a teenager and there is nothing I can do. Has anyone else experienced this?
    Me being spineless is due to my intense fear of conflict with short masculine older lesbians. I just automatically want to do everything possible to keep conflict down and I always sacrifice my dignity for it. I tell myself that "next time" I will change. Always "next time" but next time never comes.
    I just continue being the weak spineless person.I am a 38year old woman what is wrong with me?
    I am 5ft10 foot tall and being well endowed well built and curvy always on high heels makes me HUGE!
    The other day I was in a mall with my daughter and this little boy pointed at me and said something like: "Gush mom, look at her, she is giant!!!"
    If I am in a crowded room, I am a head above 95% of the people. WHY do short mature lesbians always touch me? Am I really so touchable? I have large boobs, and all men like to tell me about them. Men talk about them a lot, but no man ever dares to touch them. If he did I would tell him to fuck off. If he did I would scream. If he did I might even report it, depending on the situation and my comfort and who he was and where we were and you know, All The Things. But short creepy lesbians have often touched my boobs, and I’m sure they will continue to touch my boobs. Why is that?

    Why would I scream my head off if a man did it but I can’t verbalize a succinct “NO” to the short lesbian women who do it?A short skinny scary butch lesbian in her late sixties once told me indignantly, when I asked her to please remove her face from my tits, “It’s fine because I’m woman!” Another once actually said, “I just want to touch them!” My breasts have been grabbed numerous times in jest by short masculine older lesbian women. There is one awful ugly short skinny red haired soft butch woman in her early 50s who has groped my breasts and slapped my ass on numerous occasions for the past year. I just had an issue with this last week on the parking lot after work this new short muscular old butch lesbian security guard grabbed my boobs and then ran her hands all the way down my body…and then a few minutes later she did it again. I didn’t say anything or tell her to stop because it just happened so fast, and I didn’t know what to say anyways. am a 38year old woman. I am divorced since november 2013.
    I have 11year old daughter. I was married for 8 years. I dress in mainly tight satin and silk fashionable clothing. Always on high heels.Men find me attractive, and I like male attention.I don't think men are uncontrollable, because one of the things I enjoy most about male company is flirting and teasing, and yes they can't help getting aroused but they definitely stop when they know I'm not ready. On the more sexual aspect of it I do find something empowering about arousing a guy in public through flirtation and teasing.But I feel quite uncomfortable with older short masculine women. At the same time I feel surge of confidence towards women who are taller than me or their heights almost match mine.
    I am 5ft10 tall and curvy. All my best friends have been almost my height.If a short mature creepy masculine woman approaches me and touches me I completely freeze up.Totally paralyzed.This almost always happens.Because of that since i was a teenager i let weird short lesbians to touch me and grope me.How can i explain this to a therapist?I am suffering from a paralyzing fear of short masculine lesbians. I feel like a fool, but i totally freeze up. i've lost count of the amount of times I've been groped by short masculine lesbians. It is bizarre because i am 5ft10 tall curvy always on high heels i am towering.I often run into short lesbians who feel the need to reach out and touch me grab my breasts or slap my ass.I've even had complete strangers older short masculine lesbians squeezing my breasts with both hands pressing their faces on my breasts rubbing my ass.I would LOVE to know how to fend off invasive creepy short lesbians.

    Usually when short masculine mature lesbians who shouldn't be touching me try to...I just kinda... let them do the touching the groping hugging or whatever, but I basically just sit/stand pretty stiffly and then start breathing again when the lesbian is done.I have no idea how to stop it from happening in the first place. I wish I did.Why do they scare me so?They just....freak me out.I am a 38year old 5ft10 tall heterosexual curvy hourgllass shaped attractive brunette.I I like dressing well, and looking presentable.
    Most of my outfit are satin pant and skirt suits satin coats and satin and silk blouses.I am always on high heels and full make up on.My problem may sound funny to some, but is real for me.I always have problems with mature short masculine women touching me, bumping into me , grabbing my butt, or bumping into my breasts. Lesbians always approach me wanting to make small talk but it always seems like its more than that. I could be walking in a store and they entire area could be clear and masculine lesbians bump into me. They stare until it becomes uncomfortable. I could be standing by myself and the entire area would be clear and a masculine woman would come and stand so close to me. I am very feminine.
    Its not the younger feminine lesbians either they don't bother me, its the really ugly older masculine short women that do this. Whats going on? I don't dress slutty at all. My boobs are 32 f bra size though and I do have a big butt.i am 5ft10 tall and always on high heels. I have had old masculine lesbians grope me and talk to me about random things in the bathroom many times. They are worst than the men, they stare so much. i'm not homophobic at all. The reality we are in an era where women are getting just as aggressive if not more than men. They see it as not as harmful because they are the same sex. I've been through it all. When I was at college there was this girl, she was really short and muscular. She would just constantly grabbing my breasts and butt. It was very bizarre.
    Last october at the book club meetings there was this 53 year old 5ft2 tall skinny Lyle Lovett lookalike lesbian she would do things like stroke my back and massage my shoulders or try to touch my breasts. One time she came up next to me and squeezed my boobs. Another example we were standing she started squeezing my butt and would not take her hands off my butt and kept pulling me back when I ran away! I'm straight so i will never sleep with a woman. In april 2015 I've even been groped by a old short skinny butch lesbian in the grocery store.

    I'm not homophobic. I'm afraid of them. HELP I AM LITERALLY SCARED OF MASCULINE SHORT OLDER LESBIANS TO DEATH.If there is short masculine mature woman standing next to me, I feel both MENTAL AND PHYSICAL fear. And why are that type of lesbians always drawn to me? My friend thinks that because i am always dressed up in shiny satin and silk clothes always on high heels tall and curvy i am radiant and touchoable to them ..There is this 5ft3 59year old skinny masculine lesbian neighbor she is always touching me. She is very touchy feely.She likes to caress satin fabric and would place her hands on me at any occasion. Whenever there is short older masculine woman in the room she always comes up and puts her arm around me or rubbing my back or something.One time in my office this old short lesbian client I had only spoken to once came up behind me while I was at my desk and started rubbing my shoulders.
    Lesbians seem to think that they should go putting a hand on my breasts or patting me on the back.One time at a restaurant i was putting on my red satin coat and this short scary butch woman came up and aggressively pulled up my collar for me then bolted off.It seems it was an attempt at a pick up but a very weird attempt. Not everyone wants to be man handled by someone that has come up behind you. I'm being told I look like I want to be touched. One time in Chicago this creepy old short skinny woman came up behind me and put her hand on my butt while I was walking. Please share what you think right that i should take on to move ahead?
    So I have an irrational fear of short masculine older lesbians . I've had it ever since I can remember and it has impacted my life so much to a point that I WANT to try and conquer my fears. Can anyone help?This might seem like a stupid thing but I have a fear of lesbians. I know it's really weird and probably sounds ridiculous. It's a deep rooted uncomfortable feeling rather than a hatred of lesbians.
    I don't have an issue with lesbians doing what they do and i dont dislike them as people. I don't quite know how to explain this. When masculine lesbian is standing next to me i am freezing.

    Please understand.There is a state I get into that I am struggling to understand.There are some things I don't know how to describe to you.I've been reading everything I can find about the freeze response, but it doesn't quite fit. What is wrong with me? Is this a normal reaction to getting attacked...to disappear into your head and go limp or rigid? I've never heard anyone say they did this and I'm so ashamed that I couldn't even say no or push them away.Being tall and curvy draws attention on its own. This can be both postive and negative. I tower over plenty of men and women. I love my height and my curvy stature. I love satin and silk clothes and dressing up too. I am always in high heels with hair and makeup done. That's just who I am.I love dressing up, I've tried dressing down, but I always end up changing.
    my clothes are there to be worn! I want to look hot! I have been groped by weird mature short masculine lesbians countless times in my life. I'm not sure what it is but it's almost as if somehow, I subconsciously attract those kinds of women. Most men who talk to me in public don't touch me but lesbians are always touching me. I haven't been touched by strange men in a creepy way. It seems lesbians can flirt so aggressively it would get a guy arrested, but it works for them.
    That's actually a big issue. Plenty of strait women do not appreciate how handsy some lesbian women can get. As for why they get away with it... I don't know. anything that's harassment when a man does it is still harassment when a woman does it. That doesn't change just because it's coming from a different source.
    In my experience masculine weird short lesbians can be especially aggressive. I think that our culture kind of gives them a pass, since homosexuality between women isn't nearly as taboo and a lot of women can get away with being pretty handsy with each other. I don't know why older short lesbians always think they can grab my boobs or slap my ass and invade my personal space like that.
    They think it's ok to slap my ass or squeeze my breasts, they're just probably even more bold because they think they can get away with doing something like that more than than men can. I've never had men do anything like that.
    My friend thinks that because i am tall curvy always dressed up in classy shiny silk and satin clothes on high heels full make up looking like stuck up and arrogant snob they just like to humiliate me. I don't get it though. I really don't think that I am sending out that vibe at all. When short masculine mature lesbians are groping me touching me hugging me pressing their faces on my breasts I just wanted them to finish and leave.…I don’t want anybody else to notice what is going on, because I am so embarrassed by the whole thing. I’m embarrassed that weird short masculine lesbians touching me and groping me countless times so intimately and I did nothing about it.
    Also, I have huge boobs, and I've had random short lesbians approach me, seemingly perplexed, and touch my breasts the same way someone might pat a pregnant lady's belly.Usually i am freezing and too shocked to say anything about it right then and there. And I guess that is the lesbian groper's power - the stealthy and quick assault. it's happened to me countless times and I was too shocked and sickened to do anything about it when in retrospect I should have turned around and punched the short lesbo geek in the face. I feel like if I think it's not my fault, I'm just pretending in order to make myself feel better. I always physically freeze when older masculine short lesbian is touching me. It happened countless times of me freezing physically. God that sounds horrible out loud.Every time when I face short lesbian older masculine groper i freeze and just cannot do anything.I freeze and don't talk. I am frozen!That doesn't work wonders at all. It feels like I am fighting but also I am frozen in place. My hourglass shape is unique and i am tall, and I appreciate that.If you are curvy, tall and busty, many clothes tend to look sexier on you than on a thin person. So things that fit properly that are relatively conservative can be suddenly too revealing and sexy when you put it on. This happens to me a lot.I wear almost always my satin and silk blouses fully buttoned to the top combined with a satin skirt or satin pants. I prefer wearing satin pants and a little shorter satin skirts, always above knees, sometimes even quite much, but not any miniskirts anyway. I am always on high heels and full make up on.I am always in tight form fitting satin and silk clothes. I am a stylish person.I usually stay away from anything too revealing.I have an overwhelming amount of attention from men, but also short masculine older lesbian WOMEN.Weird short mature lesbians gravitate toward me like fruit flies on a banana AND THEY ALL WANT TO TOUCH.I have never had a man even ask to touch me, let alone do it without permission.I'm such a push over with practicaly every short mature masculine lesbian.I'm practically defenceless against them.I'm only a pushover with older short masculine lesbians. It's always been that way.I'm not a pushover, with men,heterosexual women and even younger or taller lesbians. I'm actually a little *too* defensive.I've just always shrunk from confrontation with short older masculine women.
    Well my problem is, I simply freeze when short older masculine lesbian is touching me. I freeze up.So what to do? I unfortunately have plenty of experience with this.Freeze is how I developed my ability to completely disassociate and numb out basically every time when short masculine mature lesbian is groping me and touching me.Does anyone else have a very strong freeze response? It is what is putting me in bad situations with that type of lesbians.It is bizarre because i am 5ft10 tall,curvy and always on high heels standing next to these women i look like a giant.Because of that I was not taken seriously ever by other people.I'm feeling really frustrated. Most heterosexual women dislike me. I have one real female friend. That's it. ONE. I have been told that i look stuck up and arrogant.I have had the experience of women being jealous of me.I like satin and silk clothes and I wear them well, I should not have to suffer for what I like because other women have low self esteem and don’t see the gifts they have within themselves.I have a more stylish sense of fashion. I never wear anything trashy, I keep myself well covered and strive for professionalism and class.
    I am totally paralyzed.Heterosexual women don't like me.A lot of them are rude to me. I don't mean all women are rude, but I have to say that the majority of women I encounter are. It's more to do with body language and the tone of voice than anything else, these women haven't actually said anything nasty to my face, but probably are thinking it. I get hit on a lot by guys, which makes women I am around jealous for some reason.People often think i am stuck up arrogant and a bit of a snob when i am NOTHING like that at all,i have also been told that i think i am better than everyone else.This 5ft3 tall 59year old skinny masculine lesbian gray haired wrinkled face lesbian moved moved two houses from me in february this year.She is constantly outside in her front yard.It is impossible to avoid her.Every time i am coming home from work she is approaching me and touching me.She is always hugging me tight.Pressing her face on my breasts.She is a a squeeze hugger that lasts too long in a vice grip.She is saying that she likes to stroke shiny satin fabric.She always links arms with me and walks leaning into me. I HATE IT!Sometimes she is holding me from behind with her hands on my waist.She is extremely touchy. She always find a way to be near me like she standing in front of me my boobs touching her face.She touches and messes with my hair, holds my hand (interlocking fingers).Also there is this awful awful ugly red haired freckled face thin lips 5ft2 tall skinny soft butch woman.She is a free lance accountant.Last year we were sharing the same workplace for three months.She is totally obsessed with my boobs.She is hugging me bouncing her face against them. She ALWAYS has to be grabbing them.She is publicly groping me at every encounter.I mean touching, squeezing, rubbing, and patting my breasts and sllaping and rubbing my ass.These two women neighbor and free lance accountant are the worse.This hideous short skinny ugly red haired accountant is on me every chance she gets.In the bathrooms she is grrabing me from behind around my waist rubbing against my body.Carresing me from behind while rubbing my breasts squeezing them uncontrollably.She'll just grab my breast randomly or place her hand on my ass.She is obsessed with my breasts. She touches them and talk about them all the time.Also she is saying that I have a round and firm butt and that she adores my ass a little bit too much. She is CONSTANTLY slapping it in public!She is always slapping or grinding on my ass.One time in the diner she slapped and rubbed my ass so much that people were staring.This repulsive short skinny geek accountant doesn't just touch me or grope me like most short older masculine lesbians would do, but she always seem to be out to embarrass me somehow.She likes humiliating me in front of people for laughs. And this ugly wrinkled face lesbian neighbor.She is always complimenting my style and touching my clothes on me.She also always place her hand on my hip at the side when i stand beside her.She likes giving me hugs. She started with hugging me for uncomfortably long times (still does),often she is hugging me from behind.She likes to touch my breasts and ass. She will rub and squeeze my breasts quickly or haphazardly sometimes (daily).Almost every day after work when i get out of my car she is there.She started rubbing my back and massaging my shoulders.She is too short so she is bending me over while rubbing my back.She is making me sit in my lawn chair and and starts massaging my shoulders and breasts while talking to me that i look tired and stressed out . I am just sitting there kind of awkwardly.You are totally right she is a real predator.It is all my fault. I let these weird women walk all over me.I'm phisically stronger.I let short masculine mature lesbians get away with so much.I am totally paralyzed. My ex husband was extremely jealous and possessive.I used to tell him some of the times, not all,about incidents with short masculine older lesbians.I have stopped telling him though because he was all pissy with me like its my fault.I've met so many different men since the divorce, and each one of them that I've taken to bed has offered me something new, from the way that he kisses to the intensity of our connection. Sex after divorce is exciting.So i like to flirt with guys sometimes, and they say i tease them. I guess i like to tease them a little. Im a straight woman, i love men, simple! I am straight and I am completely 100 percent straight. So why are creepy older short masculine lesbians always approaching me and touching me and groping me?Why is this happening to me?what could be the possible reasons?
     

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